What are some psychological tips you can apply in your life?

Have you ever thought that "face value" doesn't really exist, it's just an illusion?

In fact, there is a button inside your brain, through which the outside world can manipulate you.

Likewise, if you master that button, you can also manipulate the other person, whether it's a relationship, workplace, business competition or sales pitch.

Why are talented people more attractive to the opposite sex? Do people who can play the piano have a higher face value?

This article will explore how the chemistry of the human brain affects daily preferences and how we can stimulate and utilize such chemistry mechanisms.

Men must have heard a woman say, "I don't know why, that man is obviously very good and handsome, but I just don't feel anything for him".

The so-called "feeling" in this sentence is actually an "impulse".

The "impulse" is the result of the object's attraction to the subject, and ultimately the subject will feel the object's high value, which is actually the intuitive experience of this impulse - in short, this sentence means, maybe other people think that man is handsome, but I don't know why, I don't think he is handsome, because I don't have an impulse for him.

And this impulse cannot be explained or stimulated by reason. Likewise, the aversion to something for some reason is actually another kind of impulse that cannot be harnessed by reason.

The impulse itself is generated by the subconscious level dominant role, is a kind of unconditioned reflex.

What does unconditioned reflex mean, junior high school biology class have learned, is that the individual can not avoid the passive stress response.

As Sigmund Freud, the patriarch of psychology, said, the signals from the subconscious level are far more powerful than the surface consciousness, which represents your reason, but your surface consciousness cannot overrule your subconscious signals.

Take a simple example, agoraphobia. Fear of heights is a typical individual behavior dominated by the patient's subconscious signals. No matter how much reason he uses to convince himself that he is actually safe, but it doesn't work, he will still be unable to control his fear of taking the tourist elevator.

If agoraphobia cannot be substituted, then I will give the example that most people are afraid of long-legged spiders, and I myself am afraid of them, but why would I be? From a rational point of view, it is not going to cause you harm ah, if you say it is because you are afraid of it hurting you, then why are you not afraid of stray cats? It is reasonable to say that the probability of a stray cat scratching you is much higher. See, this cannot be explained from a rational point of view, this is the power of subconscious signals, it will directly override your surface consciousness to send signals to your body.

From Freud's theory of the subconscious, the individual's fear, disgust, love and other emotions for the same thing, is from your subconscious past experience or the properties of the thing itself with your deep memory inside an impression of the link, the formation of the impulse, this link is the individual can not be deconstructed or directly over the deconstruction link and send signals to the body.

For example, a person who suffers from severe fear of heights must be related to his childhood trauma, but he may never remember exactly which trauma caused it.

People are afraid of long-legged spiders because the spider's form is associated with your subconscious experience or deep impressions, for example, the spider's long legs are needle-like, and the needles trigger signals related to danger in your experience. --The combination of these forms your instinctive fear of spiders as beneficial insects.

That is, it is not the spider itself that brings fear, but rather third-party factors - factors that symbolize danger. The key is how your fear of third-party factors is projected onto the spider - we can call the whole process the "binding effect". Or, in layman's terms, it makes you have bad associations.

Before understanding this process, I would like to cite another famous case of a famous treatment by Hippolyte Bernheim (1840-1919), Freud's mentor and author of Hypnosis, Suggestion and Psychotherapy.

It was a little girl who developed an inexplicable and extreme aversion to milk and whose parents sent her to Bernheim for psychotherapy. Bernheim used hypnosis to try to find the cause from the depths of the girl's memory.

What was found was that the girl had drunk a fly while drinking a glass of milk as a toddler and vomited it up. Since then she has had an extreme aversion to milk, even though she had long forgotten about the fly.

Later, Bernheim was able to remove the fly from the girl's memory through hypnotherapy, and the girl never had an aversion to milk again.

Did you notice an interesting fact in the above case? What the little girl disliked was not the milk itself, but the fly, and her dislike of the fly had a binding effect on the milk.

The reason why there is such a projection or binding effect, Freud later argued that this is actually the result of biological evolution.

According to evolution, biological evolution revolves around the two major themes of better survival and better reproduction. One of the important abilities for better survival is to effectively avoid dangerous environments, and emotions like "fear" or "aversion" are born on this basis, which allows individuals to instinctively and spontaneously avoid potential threats.

In fact, what you experience as "fear" or "aversion" is essentially "vigilance". When you are under a potential threat, your subconscious mind sends a powerful signal to your brain to "stay away, get away as soon as possible", when your muscles tense up, your senses become sharp, your concentration is significantly increased, and there is a strong urge to get rid of the situation as soon as possible, and this instinct is one of the important abilities that keep the species alive.

And with evolution, this ability will continue to become acute, acute to a certain extent, one of the manifestations is that even if you just slightly associated with, your brain will immediately trigger such a mechanism, such as you are in the dark, see spiders, in high places and all the things or circumstances that allow you to associate with danger - yes, in fact This is the manifestation of biological "higher".

The nature of the "binding effect" is the result of such an evolutionary process.

Now let's return to the subject of this article - another human impulse, the preference for the opposite sex and the experience of the concept of "beauty" or "sexiness", is essentially a kind of bondage effect, and understanding and using it is the subject of this article. Understanding and using it is the theme of this article.

Let's start with a summary: your experience of someone who is good looking or sexy is essentially a dopamine craving projected onto that person, or a bonding effect with that person, resulting in an "impulse".

Yes, face value is actually an illusion, a vague or even wrong representation of your subconscious impulses, just like the case of milk and flies mentioned earlier, which are unrelated but create a bundle that can be created, manipulated and distorted.

How should I understand the above passage?

First of all dopamine is the essence of all pleasurable sensations, such as fapping, massage, promotion, eating good food, pleasant music, etc. You pursue these because your brain is secreting a lot of dopamine when these things happen.

But one key thing to understand is that dopamine brings pleasure, but what drives people to pursue dopamine is not pleasure, but "thirst", the thirst for dopamine in the normal state or in the negative dopamine state.

So, the feeling you get when you fall in love with someone is not essentially a feeling of pleasure, but a feeling of "thirst". This is why love is as sweet as lilac and as bitter as balsamic vinegar, or even bitter most of the time, the painful feeling of unfulfilled thirst, and once satisfied with a large amount of dopamine, you will be more thirsty and more painful. This is how you step by step deeper and deeper unable to extricate themselves.

It is very important to understand this point. Most people fail because they don't understand this point and do things that are contrary to the attraction.

So how does the subject allow himself to be connected or tied to the object's pursuit of dopamine?

The most typical example is that in the movie Tong Pak Fu, Chou-heung dislikes Tong Pak Fu's family man Hua An so much that she can be disgusted.

But because she has long admired Tang Bohu's own talent in her heart, even though Qiu Xiang has never met him, she will fall in love with him because of his poems.

When she learns that Hua An's true identity is Tong Bo Hu, this adoration can even be transferred to this person she once hated so much that she fell hopelessly in love with him.

It is not difficult to find that those who can play the piano, violin, guitar, or can sing, can cook food, there is no worry about the object around. Those rock bands abroad who attend music festivals never lack a partner.

The truth is that watching a basketball game itself brings a lot of dopamine, especially when the team you support wins.

The next question to explore is why the pursuit of music, art, food, athletics and other things that bring dopamine, will be projected onto the body of a human being.

The next question is, if I want to bring dopamine because of the good music played by ta, then I will take my phone to download the same music and listen to it again and again, so it will bring more dopamine, then why do I still desire that person?

How exactly do people project their impulses towards things?

Here we share a famous case in history - a brain neurology-cum-psychiatry professor named Robert Heath in the United States in 1970 successfully straightened a gay man through electroshock therapy.