Some Thoughts

I would like a reader to remember my story days or even hours after they’ve read it. Sure, claps and comments are among some of the more obvious ways we measure our standing. However, the unseen benefits of the time you spend writing something are when the reader thinks about what you said later on. This is unseen, as I said. You will never know if it happens. It’s just something you have to have faith in.

Think about how you’d feel at work if somebody came up to you, out of the blue, and said, “You know, I was thinking about what you said in our last team meeting about folks saying hello and goodbye as they leave the office. I’m going to start doing that. I think it might make the others feel better about themselves somehow. Like, even though I’m nobody, I saw them.”

Right away, I’d want to say something about them thinking they're nobodies. Everybody is somebody. So, what if everybody else in the office or your class has a better standing or makes more money than you do? The thing is that you might notice more than other people. If you’re a writer, noticing things is a given. You might not think so, but I’m pretty sure that’s what we do.

I used to tell people in our convenience stores that they were the face of the company. This happens with folks who answer the phones in an office, too. Even if they are overworked and underpaid, their jobs are very important. So, you start out at the bottom of pretty much any job and work your way up just like anybody else. Unless you are born with a silver spoon in your mouth, the playing field is level. Another thing is that you might not think anyone is watching you, but they are. Not that they are spying on you. It’s just that they are observant too.

Another thing I want to point out is that a person does not have to be busy every minute of every day. If you don’t take breaks every once in a while, you’ll get worn out. If this is a problem, just schedule in some time for yourself.

This is one thing I learned at work. Having a problem and going to your boss or supervisor to complain is one thing. Going to them with a solution in mind will be appreciated. Even if they don’t take you up on it right away, they will appreciate what you did. And who knows? They might even come around later on after they’ve thought about it and either counter it with another suggestion or just take you up on your offer. You will really know they’ve been listening to you when they ask you for help with another problem that's come up. No, you likely won’t be offered a promotion, but you will know someone noticed you were doing something right.

Something else I learned. Nobody likes a whiner. It’s one thing when you are three years old. It’s another thing when you are 24. It is not anybody else’s responsibility to make you happy. That’s something that you have to do on your own. It sounds harsh. I mean, we all grew up thinking we’d get married and live happily ever after, right? Well, it takes two people to work at a marriage, to understand that they will both grow and change through the years. If you can accommodate that and also say you are sorry, you’ll be better able to navigate life's ups and downs.

My husband is fond of saying to other men, “The only thing you need to remember to say is, ‘Yes, Dear,’ and you’ll be fine.”

What is it that you like to do when you are relaxed? Read something? Watch something on television or your computer? Play solitaire? Knit or crochet? Perhaps taking your dog for a 20-minute walk would be nice for both of you. You say you don’t have a dog? Maybe there is someone who lives near you and has a dog and would appreciate it.

Another thing I believe is necessary in life is kindness, both for yourself and for others. Is there an older person in your neighborhood who might appreciate a companion to get out and walk around a little bit? Maybe they could use some help getting groceries. Stop by, introduce yourself, say you are on the way to the store, and ask if they need something.

You’ve only got 24 hours in any one day. You’re going to spend part of that sleeping. The rest of it, if you’re not retired, is going to be spent at work, at school, or raising your family. Give yourself the gift of time. If that means getting up earlier, which is what I did for many years so I could write, then do that. You’ll grow accustomed to having that special time to do whatever it is that holds a place in your heart.

Thanks for reading.
Pauline Evanosky