Normalize being me.

Our society has a saying: "normalize [insert anything, literally anything]."

Normalize going to the movie theaters alone. Normalize girls having fat rolls. Normalize wearing bright colors, not changing your last name when you get married, natural hair. Anything. Seriously, anything you can think of can be put into that phrase. I'm sure you have even said it yourself a time or two, I know I have. This trend has become so widespread even Buzzfeed did an article about it where people shared things they wished were more socially acceptable.

It's the idea that anything which doesn't fit into the definition of societal 'rules' we needed to ask permission to do or participate in. But this trend or phrase had negatively impacted people in a way that I don't believe we have realized yet. This statement has done two things to our society.

First, it has given us a pass to be lazy.

Whether you've heard it or not, people are actually saying things like "normalize a messy house" or "normalize eating junk food all the time."

I personally found myself in a really unhealthy place a few years ago. I was eating fast food all the time and just not taking care of my body like I wanted to. I know I will get some heat for this, but when people were saying 'normalize every kind of body type' I let myself become lazy in my health routine and it wasn't good for me.

While I fully agree that our society has a skewed view of what a 'normal' body looks like (because there is no such thing a one normal body type) we have a serious disconnection between our mirrors and our minds. I'm not shaming anyone, if that's the season you're in, then live out that season and jump back into the life you want when you're ready. If that's the lifestyle you want then live it fully, that you do you, but don't use the 'normalize my unhealthy lifestyle' to let your body or mind stay in a broken place just because you're too lazy to change something in your life.

The other way this trend has damaged our society is that by using this phrase we have given power to people who should have no power over us. I literally just said it above, you do you. There is no rule book for life, so where does it say that we need to have permission for those around us to be who we were created to be? I mean, come on. In what universe do I need to ask permission to love my natural hair? At the same time, if I want to get a perm or dye it another color, who have I permitted to tell me I can't become a redhead? No one.

No one can tell me that I have to be a certain way, or that I can't jam out in my car to the radio. So what if the teenagers in the car next to me laugh at my stupid dance moves? I don't care. Let me say that again for the people in the back. I. Don't. Care. And you shouldn't either!

Take back the power you gave to people outside of yourself and be whoever you want to be, no boundaries (okay, maybe some. Like don't go stealing purses from little old ladies or anything) but if you want to say no to invitations because you need a night in, then say no. And say it with confidence.

The moment I took away society's power over me to decide what was 'acceptable' or not I was freed to be me. The weight of pleasing the world was lifted from my shoulders and it was the woman looking back at me in the mirror who became in charge of her own future. Now, the decisions are mine to make and no one's opinion mattered besides my own. I don't care to be accepted by those around me because they have a different idea of who I should be than the woman I am.

Normalizing something makes it, well, normal. Being normal isn't worth it. Being normal means you wash into the wallpaper and go unseen. Why would I want the world to look like me when it can be looking at me? Looking at me and thinking, man I wish I had what she has. Well, then join me in pulling up your own seat to the table and be authentically you. Break free from the bonds of waiting for the world to 'normalize' what makes you unique and just be you, confidently. Dance in the rain. Laugh out loud at the theatre. Walk into a store and not buy anything. Step into the spotlight and show the world who you are instead of waiting for the world to 'normalize' you.

I won't lie to you and say that I know exactly who I am because I myself am still figuring it out, but the moment I do the world better be ready.