Annie Grace says, "Alcohol is the only drug on Earth you have to justify *not* using."
You worry about becoming sober for this very reason and carry on drinking to avoid having to justify your choice. I understand the situation you're in, I drank past this feeling for years. I'd drink to fit in, to make and keep friends, to have "fun". Inside I was miserable and depressed. I believed alcohol was the answer I needed, the answer to all of life's worries. It wasn't until I hit rock bottom that I realised the lie I was living. Sobriety was the answer I truly needed.
I'm hoping this article reaches you before you have to walk down that dark path. Take the leap of faith today, become sober and find your happiness.
The big decision
It all starts with a decision to remove these toxic substances from your life. Once you have resolved to live a clean life, it's vital to put your past behind you. Don't live in regret of not becoming sober sooner, no more wishing for drunken "fun" nights. Look forward to an alcohol-free future. Realise that drinking is a tedious cycle of monotony, and it is a drunken circle of doing nothing. You think you're having fun when in reality, it is the same dull shit on repeat. There is no positive feature of this substance that is worth ruining your health for.
In sobriety, you can look back and realise that drinking isn't fun; it's actually a distraction from your boring life.
After drinking for the entirety of my adult life, I didn't know how to live any other way. I realised I was drinking myself to death, and my life wasn't going anywhere. You may be feeling the same, and you know that your drinking habit is causing you to stagnate. Yet you carry on. Ask yourself;
What would life look like without alcohol?
Better, more enjoyable, healthier, financially stable, more productive. The positives far outweigh the negatives.
As you grow into sobriety, your tastes may change. Before you craved wine on a Friday night, now you want to go camping with your family for the weekend. Before, you'd spend Sunday in bed nursing a hangover; now, you spend Sundays painting and drawing.
Everyone is different, so I can't tell you what you're interests are. One thing that is for sure is how your brain changes for the better in sobriety.
When your brain is doused in alcohol, it warps your reality. You think that alcohol is the key to fun and happiness. Once you lift the veil and become sober, you see the lie. In truth, reality is brighter, it is full of energy and fun. The journey is far from easy, but it is far better than leading a monotonous routine fuelled by alcohol.
You can recover, I want you to take the leap of faith and improve your life. Find yourself again and start having fun.
Having fun means getting dressed up for a Friday night out, going into the city and finding a nightclub to spend your night, blasting all your money on cocktails and awakening the next day full of joy.
Whilst writing that, I scrunched up my face. How the hell did I ever think that was enjoyable?
Fun in sobriety is different. It is more fulfilling and enjoyable. To have fun in sobriety, you have to redefine what it means to you. It doesn't matter what others think is fun; you decide what you enjoy.
Fun might mean;
- hiking and exploring
- bouldering and rock climbing
- arts and crafts
A great starting point to find your hobby is looking back at your childhood and remembering what you did to pass the time.
At 32, I have started skating again.
Someone said to me recently, "Aren't you too old to be skating?." I quickly replied, "Aren't you too young to be giving up on your dreams".
Don't listen to the haters, do what makes you happy, break the rules and be a rebel. Your age doesn't matter as long as you're smiling.
Also, your version of fun doesn't have to involve being fit. I see a lot of people transition from drunk slob to a fitness freak. Suppose you don't enjoy exercise, that's fine. Being healthy is one thing; forcing yourself to "enjoy" exercise is another. If you don't enjoy exercise and are forcing it, you may relapse and go back to drinking. I will repeat it, do what makes you happy!
If you're unsure and stuck, make a bucket list to try a new activity every weekend. Do random crazy things (COVID safe, please). Enjoy the process, you never know what will light the fire in your soul. You may find a hidden passion, the piece of the puzzle that's been missing this entire time. The answer to the question, how do I enjoy life without alcohol?
Fun isn't drugging yourself into oblivion. It is about making yourself and others smile. It is about having control over life once again. You are the one making the decisions, not the alcohol. You have regained control; now, you set the boundaries and decide what works for you and what doesn't. Fun is what lights the fire in your heart, it brings a smile to your face. You forget your worries and enjoy the moment.