Compliments Are Contagious

When was the last time you complimented a stranger? Excluding that time you were drunk in the club bathroom and you really loved that girl's shoes. Not counting complimenting customers at work to adhere to friendly service standards. But a time when you were out in public, doing your own thing, and just complimented someone you crossed paths with. It may take you awhile to remember- prior to writing this article I realized that I am guilty of not doing this very often.

Now, think of a time that you were given a genuine compliment by someone you did not know. You probably blushed and got suddenly shy. Perhaps you got a fuzzy feeling in your stomach? Looked down at your feet and said "Oh, thank you!" Then you probably went back home and said to your family over dinner "You will not believe what happened to me today!" proceeding to retell the story of the compliment with your own embellishments to sensationalize the events.

However it happened, my point is, you felt good right? And aren't we always looking for more ways to feel good? Then when you feel good, you're more likely to do more good- and a pattern of kindness emerges. Compliments are one of the simplest things to give and receive, and best of all it's free! I don't know about you, but with everything going on in the world I was struggling with a feeling of helplessness. I am just one person, and I am far from wealthy, what can I do to help lift up the people around me?

One day I was out walking my dog when I crossed paths with another dog owner. We smiled and nodded at each other while our dogs sniffed and touched noses. As I was about to walk away the dog owner said "I love your hat! Where did you get it?" I was wearing a black brimmed hat with a gold chain accent, which in the fall is a part of my go-to dog walking attire. I blushed, smiled, looked down at my jacket and felt kind of shy. I replied "Oh, thank you! I got it at some vintage store downtown."

"Well it looks super on you! Take care!" and she walked away. Let me tell you, I felt so good afterwards. In fact, I proceeded to find a nice colourful tree to pose underneath and took selfies almost immediately after. I can truly say, that moment made my day go from average to great!

Still on my serotonin high, I walked back to my building and got in the elevator with one of my neighbours. I've ridden the elevator with him about a thousand times, and he always has the nicest sneakers on. Plus they're always in pristine condition- which seems miraculous to myself who cannot keep mud off my shoes to save my life. I thought to myself I should tell him I like his shoes, he clearly takes pride in them, he'll appreciate that I noticed. And I did.

"You always have the nicest sneakers! And I admire how you keep them in such great shape," gesturing first to his shoes then to my beaten up rubber boots. He paused, looked at me, looked at his shoes, and then smiled before saying "Oh, thank you! Yeah my collection of sneakers are my prized possessions, the only thing that means more to me is my wife." We shared a laugh before exchanging good nights as he got off the elevator. That's when it hit me; compliments are contagious!

Had that dog owner not complimented my hat, I may not have felt confident enough to finally talk to my neighbour to tell him I liked his shoes. Her act of kindness not only made my day, but it propelled me to be kind to someone else. Who knows, maybe I made my neighbour's day! I also observed that after giving the compliment, and having it so well-received, I felt better too! After a little more research I learned that giving compliments is actually proven to make you feel as good as receiving them and overall it helps manifest a more positive mind set.

I am making a pledge to myself- from now on I'm not just going to keep these compliments alone in my thoughts, I am going to say them out loud! I thought really hard about times when I did compliment strangers. Though it took me awhile to remember anything specific, two moments really stood out in my mind.

One day I was in line for coffee behind a girl who had her nails painted in this beautiful shade of blue with little flowers painted on the ends- so I told her I love them, and I learned that she did them herself! Another day I was feeling really bold and the guy beside me on the subway was listening to one of my favourite songs really loudly in his headphones. I typed out my compliment on my cellphone and lifted it to his eye line. He smiled and laughed. He took his headphones off and we realized that we had both been at that bands concert a month earlier!

Human beings are social creatures- yet we tend to live in our own world a lot of the time, forgetting about those around us. Taking a moment to connect with one and other - no matter how brief- is proving to be more important than ever. Paying a stranger a compliment can be life affirming when you realize the positive power your words can have on others. Sharing a smile with someone helps bring sunny thoughts forward even on your cloudiest of days.

Now I am passing on my challenge to you, take two extra seconds and give out a random compliment to someone you don't know. Who knows, maybe that small gesture of kindness will turn their day around. Perhaps you'll be surprised with the feeling it gives you in return. Go ahead! Sprinkle about some positivity and joy, we could all use more of it, and find out for yourself just how contagious compliments can be!