The State of Men's Mental Health

“Mental health problems don’t define who you are. They are something you experience. You walk in the rain, and you feel the rain, but, importantly, YOU ARE NOT THE RAIN.”

Matt Haig.

There is now far more information available to read on the internet today for people who are troubled with mental health worries, not simply for themselves, but for those who may be looking or caring for friends or family members also.

No one needs to ever try to manage mental health problems alone or in silence.

For myself, I find that reading quotes that others have written about mental health can actually be quite enlightening, after all, discovering that others have gone through that dark tunnel that life can sometimes chuck at you, and have found that light at the end of the tunnel, can be so very refreshing and support you to understand that you really are not alone at all.

So, let’s start talking about men and mental health.

⬆️ Three times as many men as women die by suicide.

⬆️ ️Men aged 40 to 49 have the highest suicide rates in the UK.

⬇️ Men report lower levels of life satisfaction than women, according to the Government’s national well-being survey.

⬇️ Men are less likely to access psychological therapies than women, with only 36% of referrals to NHS talking therapies being for men

✨ Society’s expectations and traditional gender roles play a role in why men are less likely to discuss or seek help for their mental health problems. We know that gender stereotypes about women (the idea they should behave or look a certain way, for example) can be damaging to them. But it’s important to understand that stereotypes and expectations can also damage men.

✳️ Men are often expected to be the breadwinners and to be strong, dominant, and in control. While these aren’t inherently dreadful things, they can make it harder for men to reach out for help and open up to healthcare support services.

Mental Health Foundation. Men and Mental Health. (Last updated: 1st October 2021)

The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) in January 2017 stated that “men and women both experience depression but the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) in January 2017 reported that symptoms can be quite different. Because men who are depressed may appear to be angry or aggressive instead of sad, their families, friends, and even their doctors may not always recognize anger or aggression as depression symptoms. In addition, men are less likely than women to recognize, talk about, and seek treatment for depression.”

The causation that can determine whether someone suffers from depression simply comes down to three areas:

1️⃣ Genetic factors. Men with a family history of depression may be more likely to develop it than those whose family members do not have the illness.

2️⃣ Environmental Stress. Financial problems, loss of a loved one, a difficult relationship, major life changes, work problems, or any stressful situation may trigger depression in some men.

3️⃣ Illness. Depression can occur with other serious medical illnesses, such as diabetes, cancer, heart disease, or Parkinson’s disease. Depression can make these conditions worse and vice versa. Sometimes, medications taken for these illnesses may cause side effects that trigger or worsen depression.

Let me tell you a little bit about myself and what happened to me in my earlier life. It helps me by looking back on my past. It is a typical example of just how talking and sharing experiences can positively support you. I battled through Brain Stem Cancer when I was only 3 years old. As if that did not cause enough pressure on my family and myself as I was growing (as I was left with right-sided weakness as a result) problems became worse, when my dad committed suicide seven years after this point in time. I struggled with low mood for many years as a result of this but chose to attempt to ‘battle through it,’ rather than simply talk about what was emotionally hurting me.

Years on from it, and into my adult life, this stage of ‘silence’ started to eat away at me to a point where enough was enough. A low mood transformed into a bad state of depression requiring hospital in-patient care and prescription medication for a considerable amount of time.

It was a terribly dark and lonely tunnel.

But talking and anti-depressant medication led to that tunnel opening up onto a bright light of hopefulness.

And that is the key. The most important message to put across to you now.

Anti-depressant medication AND talking.

Not simply taking medication alone.

To successfully recover you need both medication & therapy.

You can read more about this in a recent article that I published much earlier below.

Don't get me wrong when I tell you about anti-depressants because your depression, yes, can be helped by the medication that is prescribed to you but, what is essential to your recovery is being able to access talking therapies at the same time.

We all need to listen.

We all need to talk.

Don’t simply bottle-up your feelings in your head. Because one day, just as a kettle boils, so too will your thoughts, feelings, and emotions, and they will burst out of your head when you least expect them to.

And that is where the real problems begin.

Medication alone can help to bring your body’s levels of:

1️⃣ Serotonin. This impacts every part of you, from your emotions to your body and motor skills. It helps with sleeping, healing, and digesting, and is also thought to be a natural mood stabilizer.

2️⃣Dopamine. An important neurochemical boosts mood, motivation, and attention, and helps regulate movement, learning, and emotional responses.

3️⃣ Norepinephrine. As a hormone, norepinephrine is released into the bloodstream by the adrenal glands and works alongside adrenaline (also known as epinephrine) to give the body sudden energy in times of stress, known as the “fight or flight” response.

But they work together… not alone.

Depression has been triggered by something.

It is that ‘something’ that you need to focus upon and explore deeply…

No medication can ever do that but talking therapy can help you to explore those negative feelings, thoughts, and emotions, in a guided and safe way.

Don’t simply brush what’s bothering you under the nearest rug.

There is no shame in speaking out…

Male behavior has been placed under a microscope as the hashtag ‘toxic masculinity,’ having been used 123,640 times on Instagram and continues to be used multiple times a day on Twitter. Whilst it is clear from these conversations that minority groups are not happy with toxic behaviors associated with masculinity, it is clear from suicide rates that men are not hugely benefiting from the expectations and values places on them either. The expectation of ‘strong and silent’, ‘stiff upper lip’, and ‘keep quiet and move forward’ seemed to stunt crucial conversations needed to rediscover a newer, healthier male mindset.

No Panic.

Let me introduce you to ‘Let’s Get Men Talking,’ hosted over on Twitter. This page is dedicated by The Marie Keating Foundation Campaign to raise awareness and remove the taboo associated with men's health issues.

And who is to blame for the way men have been conditioned into thinking the way they do, about themselves?

I’ll give you thirty guesses, but you will hit the nail on the head with your first guess!

It’s the media, yep, that’s right, you got it…

In just the same disgraceful way that the media have portrayed ‘the perfect figure’ to be for a woman and caused documented psychiatric in-patient admissions to eating disorder units (due to body image distortion) so too have the media portrayed men to be tough, silent, and emotionless along the way.

Don’t let the media damage your own mental health and body image.

🗣️ Learn to talk.

👂 Learn to listen.

There really is no shame in doing so…

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