What to Do If You and Your Fiancé Can't Agree on a Honeymoon Destination

You're a little bit country, he's a little bit rock and roll. You love the idea of tea with the Queen, he loves the idea of kicking back with a Budweiser and Ted Nugent. As wild as it is for many to believe, there are a lot of couples out there who are spectacularly different when it comes to personal tastes.

For the most part, couples that are like this can survive pretty well. In many cases, they may even balance each other out. However, when it comes to figuring out major aspects of one's life, it's not always that great a thing.

If you and your spouse-to-be are polar opposites in terms of lifestyles, finding a honeymoon you agree on is going to be rough. Even more similar couples may end up in a situation where they can't agree on a honeymoon destination.

So, what happens if you end up having this issue? Here's some advice from a veteran relationship writer.

Examine how both you and your partner are acting when it comes to your honeymoon destination.

Sometimes, the reason you can't agree on a honeymoon destination is because one or both of you are being a bit stubborn. This is obviously easily remedied by realizing that having a honeymoon isn't something that you should be bickering over.

Are you really, truly dead-set on going to Thailand? Does your spouse absolutely, positively have to go to Moscow? Maybe you're both being stubborn and need to have someone mediate?

If your partner is not willing to budge, stop right there!

One of the worst red flags to notice when you're trying to get married deals with your partner's behavior. Signs of extreme stubbornness, including doing things like stonewalling you, refusing to acknowledge your needs, and emotional blackmail, are all signs of a very bad future.

A person who refuses to compromise is a person who will probably be a very selfish life partner, especially when it comes to something that should be fun. If your partner is resorting to these tactics, ask yourself if you could really be with them.

This behavior is abusive and controlling. It's also one of the most obvious signs your relationship is starting to turn toxic. You might be better off calling off the wedding. In time, you'll realize that the breakup was a blessing in disguise.

Take a look at your relationship dynamics—especially when it comes to your lifestyle.

Sometimes, the fact that you can't agree on a honeymoon plan is a red flag that other issues may be afoot that need to be discussed. Take a look at the kinds of plans you both have for the future.

Actually, have you guys spoken about what your ideal futures would be like? If not, this might be a good time to do it. You need to be honest with yourself and your partner. If what they want isn't doable by your standards, you have to figure out whether the wedding is even worth continuing.

If you haven't discussed things and you end up having entirely different ideas of where you're headed, finding this out before you get married could save you from a near-inevitable divorce.

On the other hand, if you feel you are still good to go, then don't worry! You can keep reading to find a happy way to compromise and discover the right place for you.

If your relationship is healthy, ask why your partner doesn't want to try your trip—and what draws them to their idea.

The best way to figure out what to do is to find out why you can't agree on a honeymoon. Is he afraid of seeing giant spiders in Australia? Is it because he's heard sketchy things about Romania? Or is it because he just really isn't a fan of Swedish cuisine?

The more you find out about your partner's issues, the easier it will be to hammer things out.

You might also consider doing a split-decision.

If you have the budget and time for it, why not do both honeymoon ideas? This way, you can both get the kind of dream vacation you've always wanted while also keeping your partner happy too.

Afterward, you will both have the memories you want and feel like you have seen the world the way you wanted to. Of course, this isn't always doable.

In most cases, you will not be able to have your way 100 percent of the time. So, it's time to get diplomatic with your spouse-to-be. Talk about what you want, what you're willing to give away, and how you would want to plan the trip out.

Don't assume that you will have to give everything up in order to enjoy a honeymoon and wedding with this person. You might actually find out what you want to do is actually pretty similar to what your partner wants to do.

Research other places that you might want to go.

We've all heard of brides who insisted on going to Italy because it's so romantic, or of grooms who wanted to go to the Caribbean because it's so relaxing.

Sometimes, the best way to deal when you both can't come to an agreement on where to go is to come up with a new dream destination. A good way to do this is to discuss the kinds of traits you'd want in an ideal vacation destination, then seek out places that would have those same traits.

Actually talk things out.

A common mistake people do when they can't agree on a honeymoon trip is to try to argue it out via text. This doesn't always send across all the little nuances of what you want to say, and sometimes, actually seeing how your partner reacts can help you agree on a destination.

During this time, you should also discuss your honeymoon essentials. These include your budget, your absolute must-have experiences, as well as the amount of time you would want to spend away.

Travel agents are very retro in nature, and it can be hard to find one, but guess what—they are really, really good for honeymoon planning. If you find yourself feeling worn out by all the research and Orbitzing, your best bet is to find a travel agent to help you out.

Though they may seem old fashioned, they are often the ones who can help book everything for you while also finding a happy medium for both of you.

Make a point of highlighting the fact that you're both going abroad for a fun time.

It might be a little disappointing that you can't agree on a honeymoon and, as a result, didn't make it to your #1 honeymoon destination, but that doesn't mean that you can't have fun. Whether you're going to South Africa or to Iceland doesn't matter.

What matters is that you're with your boo, you're enjoying life, and you actually were able to enjoy a wonderful vacation together. That's a huge deal!