This Mindset Shift will Change your Life

////the moment you start working, the more output you produce in a given amount of time.

Therefore, starting is the best tip you can have for everything else you do and work on because, as soon as you start working, you start feeling motivated to work, whereas everything else is putting off the work you think you should be doing. Personally, I've noticed that for some big mental tasks, such as content pieces or large projects that require significant mental effort, it only takes me five minutes to complete them bit of a lay of the land to then get into it but I used to take hours to delay to start the first 5 minutes and so my time compression of when I thought I should start doing something and when I started doing it over time is just compressed to the point where it's like the moment I think that I need to start doing it sometimes I just start it because then what happens I get this open loop and so rather than complete work at like CU a lot of people are like I want to complete it at this really nice clean Point stop halfway through

the sentence cuz it'll drive you mad you should train and the next day you should wake up feeling good there's something called rate of perceived exertion let's say I make you do pull-ups and let's say the maximum amount of pull-ups you can do the maximum amount of Pull-Up is 10 let's keep a nice round number at 11 you couldn't do 11 if I put a should I make you do 10 pull-ups on our workout no I'm going to make you do five why because I'm setting you up to work the next day the next day we're going to do five and the next day we're going to do another five and then we're going to do six when six is really easy we're going to do seven why if you count if if you did 10 pull-ups on Monday you're going to be sore till Thursday let's say it's really your max so Thursday you've only done 10 pull-ups from Monday to Thursday you've only done 10 pull-ups me I've been doing five pull-ups every day so I'm at 20 pull-ups already 25 pull-ups I have more volume than you now if you add up at the end of the year who trained more

I've trained way more than you it's called empowerment you've heard that word right now the management definition of empowerment is get her done just get her done with fewer resources and less time I Empower you make it happen I'm talking about feeling empowered that's different feeling empowered is when you're self motivated now if you want to know if you feel empowered or if your child your student your worker feels empowered ask them three questions and if they yes say yes to these three questions they will feel empowered and by the way this is not based on common sense it's based on research but you've all been there so it'll feel like common sense question number one can you do it Albert bandur calls it selfefficacy do you believe you can do it do you have the time the knowledge and the training to do what we're asking you to do if you answer yes good second question will it work do you believe that we're asking you to do the process we at will work Albert bandor calls that response efficacy believing that the behavior will lead to the ultimate outcome by the way that takes education right

we have to show them the data we might show them some Theory we might we show them teach them why this might work I just Ed the word education earlier I used the word training is there a difference in elementary school if we call it education middle school education high school education College higher education then you go to Industry what do you call it training you have your training department there must be a difference well you know the difference do you want your kids to have sex education or sex training and your kids might answer the question differently cuz you know that training means you do the behavior and you get feedback that's powerful powerful have you ever heard this word online training I mean training is watch the behavior get online training if you answer yes do it will work third question is it worth it so we've had a training question we've had an educational question this is the motivational question do you believe the consequences this is about consequences BF sker taught us this selection by consequences Dale carnegi quoted

BF Skinner and said from the day you were born everything you did was because you wanted something for doing it consequences is it worth it so you have to convince people that it's worth it now by the way you answer yes to those three questions you feel competent am I right you feel competent at doing worthwhile work you've all been there when you feel competent at doing worthwhile work you're more likely to be self-motivated you've been there no one has to looking over you you feel now here's the challenge leaders teachers how do you inspire people to feel competent where you give them feedback you give them recognition you show them they are kind competent okay I got one more another CW Choice your common sense will tell you when you believe you have a sense of autonomy a sense of choice in what you're doing you feel more self-motivated BF Skinner taught us that too in his book beyond freedom and dignity way back in 1971 reading that book changed my life

because I realized that I am controlled by consequences but sometimes I don't feel control when I'm working for a pleasant consequence it feels good it feels like I'm working to get something when I'm working to avoid an aversive consequence I feel controlled that's called negative reinforc so here's a challenge leaders how do we get people to become success Seekers rather than failure avoiders first day of introductory psychology class I teach two classes of 600 students maybe some of you have been in that class and remember the first day I say how many are here to avoid failure an 8% raise your hand and I say well thanks for coming I I know You're motivated but you're not happy campers you probably told your friends I got to go to class it's a requirement not I get to go to class it's an opportunity you probably woke up to an alarm clock not an opportunity clock

it's all in how you see it it's your Paradigm it's how you communicate to others and how you communicate to yourself Ellen Langer said in her book mindfulness she said and psychologist know when you perceive choice you perceive motivation you're more motivated so the deal is for yourself sit back and reflect be mindful of the choices you have and talk about being a success Seeker rather than a failure avoider it's all how you talk how you communicate to yourself and to others I got a fourth CW Community powerful word psychologists know that social support is critical people who perceive a sense of relatedness a sense of connection with other people they feel motivated they're happier validating it and so I like to give myself evidence that it's true I'll give you an example one of the things right now that I'm really working on in my life and one of the things that I've lived with a lot in my life is I think I have judged people too much and not extended enough Grace and but the last 10 years of my life man I'm really proud of myself I've extended Grace to people I feel better about me brother when I extend Grace to another person I just

I just feel good about me particularly maybe when they don't deserve it in the moment give you an example give you a quick Story 3 weeks ago my kids were home for the holidays and uh so we were at dinner and so we walk into a restaurant great restaurant not like an amazing place but a good restaurant we walk in and from the lobby I can hear these kids screaming and I'm an introvert so I like quiet meals I like to actually be able to hear the people I'm talking with I like quiet restaurants this was normally a very quiet place is why I picked it this night it was not quiet in there and I can hear these children screaming and you know when you're a parent like I am sometimes you're like what is why don't you I would never let my kids act like that there's easy to judge and I didn't so anyway we walk into this restaurant and guess who we sit next to the table I could hear from the lobby there's five kids at this table with two parents and the kids are yelling and screaming and one of them's running a circle out they want them through some food and the mother had kind of had her head down the whole time and she really my tendency would be to judge that family this is an extreme story but it gives you an example of why

I work on the validating so it's good enough to say my intention is to give people Grace but I need to validate it and so my kids were kind of looking at me cuz they know their dad and I went um I'm going to extend Grace to that family right now and I actually told my family I said you guys okay it's going to sound crazy can we just say a quick prayer for them over there they were like very close to us and the rest of the restaurant had noticed them too and so I said let's say a quick prayer and they go Max say the prayer I say it to my son so my son says a quick blessing for that family and my daughter says daddy let's buy them dinner I'm like now you're pushing me but okay but okay we'll get their dinner too but we're not going to tell them anyway so we extended Grace and the entire meal they were noisy and chaotic anyway the end of the meal they left before we did and um so they left and it got very quiet in there and like ah but the whole time I had extended Grace I didn't judge them which would be a tendency I would normally maybe do in my past but now I'm validating this new intention of mine anyway we pay the bill and we leave and two days later I'm hitting a couple golf balls at the golf course and the server that night was hitting Balls next to me and he said oh Mr myet that was so kind of you to buy the meal for that night for that family in light of the funeral and I said what he goes that family that night he goes you know they had they had come there to celebrate they had just left the funeral of their grandmother I said you're kidding me and he said no and the grandmother would come in here with them they're a very close family the kids don't normally behave like that the mother that night was so down it's her mom the kids are extra close to her because their husband when he was deployed in Iraq the grandmother lived with them and sort of raised them and so they had just left the funeral that night and were having the dinner and I went there you go you never know what someone's carrying you don't know the burden they're carrying it hurt people hurt people people in pain typically will create pain for other people and I was like what a blessing that I've got to this point in my life that I do extend grace even when it doesn't seem like somebody deserves it because you don't know what they're carrying so I validated that intention with my behavior