How To Build The Self-Confidence You Need To Win At Life

Do you ever feel self-conscious about your appearance? Do you ever feel as though you lack self-assurance? It happens to the majority of us on a regular basis.

Everyone seems to be creating billion-dollar enterprises, becoming YouTube celebrities, or becoming Instagram celebrities.

Most of us, deep down, realize it's all a load of nonsense. At the same time, we see all of these individuals having amazing lives and don't care if they're genuine or not.

It doesn't matter if you want money, celebrity, travel, or none of those things since it all boils down to one question: How confident are you?

>Are you brave enough to say "fuck it" and go for your dream?

>Are you self-assured enough to declare, "Fuck it, I don't need that," and stay grounded?

Do you see what I mean? If you want to succeed in life, you must have self-confidence – a lack of confidence will always hold you back, no matter what you're doing.

According to research, a lack of self-confidence is linked to:

>Depression

>loneliness and feeling left out

>Lower academic achievement

>Lower life satisfaction

Bernice Milburn Moore wrote an essay in the journal of Educational Leadership in 1952 titled Self-Confidence For Competence. She covers self-confidence for teachers in the essay, but I've found it valuable in many aspects of life.

When you search up the definition of self-confidence, you'll find that it's pretty much the same thing every time. It's "a trust in oneself, a faith in one's capacity to confront events as they happen," according to Moore.

But, maybe more crucially, she claims:

“Self-confidence without competence is of as little use as is competence without self-confidence.”

It indicates that attending business school is a sign of expertise. However, leveraging your business expertise to run a firm requires both self-confidence and expertise. They're only beneficial when used together.

That comparison works in both directions. Simply believing in oneself without being competent is pointless – talking the talk isn't a long-term strategy.

You'll need the talk and swagger, but you'll also need to work on developing the abilities to back it up.

Building Your Self-Confidence

As a result, as you improve at what you do, you get more self-assurance. That's the system, and research backs it up.

What will you do with this information? The technique that follows is simple, but it takes a lot of effort to complete all of the phases.

This is how it goes:

1).Enhance your abilities

2).Put them to good use.

3).Check out the outcomes.

4).Increase your self-assurance.

5).Repeat

6).That's how it works.

“That’s great and all, but what if I don’t see results? Plus, I don’t have the time to practice.”

It's alright if you want to make excuses. It's your life, after all. However, this way of boosting self-esteem is focused on practical, actionable measures rather than intangibles like affirmations. Confidence does not arise out of nowhere.

You may tell yourself every day that you're confident, lucky to be alive, or anything — but if you don't have the abilities to get things done, you'll never believe it.

And this is my main beef with a lot of self-help philosophy and authors. Yes, affirmations, optimistic thinking, and goal-setting are all beneficial, but they are useless without action.

If you never accomplish anything, how can you expect to gain confidence? It isn't possible.

“Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment.” — Thomas Carlyle

“What competencies should I improve?”

It depends on what you're looking for. However, I feel that there are some abilities that everyone can benefit from.

Emotional intelligence – Humans are innately sociable, according to research. We perish if we don't have excellent relationships. And, if you want to have excellent connections, you'll need emotional intelligence: the ability to recognize and respond to other people's feelings. This is a skill that can be learned.

Self-awareness — Continuous self-reflection is a good way to practice self-awareness. Write down your ideas and attempt to figure out why you do what you do, what you can improve on, and what you're good at. Know who you are.

Solving problems — Our current educational system was established during the Industrial Revolution. We're taught to function as gears in a wheel. We aren't taught how to address difficulties in complex situations; instead, we just follow orders. However, the world has changed, and in this situation, the individual who is better at addressing problems will triumph.

Don't deceive yourself into thinking that wishing for a better life would make it so.

When you put in the effort and see the outcomes — whether it's a stronger physique, more energy, more money, or whatever it is you want — you begin to believe in your potential to accomplish your goals.

Now go out there and accomplish things, improve your skills, see results, repeat the process, and gain confidence.