Undefined

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”

― Rumi

This quote by Rumi is pretty powerful in regards to the way I feel about love. My definition of love is slightly flawed. But I like to call it a work in progress as I am becoming more open to receiving love after getting my heart stomped on for so many years by the people that claimed to "love me" and my children.

When you look up the real definition of love, you come up with "an intense feeling of deep affection".

The thing is, I feel everything so deeply as it is that most of my emotions that I experience are so intense.

So what is love to me?

Love is deep in your core, in the center of your heart charka. And when you experience it, your whole vibration changes.

I have always been obsessed with the idea of finding true love. Ever since I was a young girl, I dreamed that my Prince Charming was coming to rescue me. Little did I know that I could find that within myself. The love I so desperately yearned for was found within me. And that's the greatest gift that you could ever give to yourself.

I spent so much of my time being the person in the wrong relationship that I realize now later in life that I was unhealthy by expecting all of the love that I felt like I deserved was to come from someone else. Nope. You have to find a way to give yourself some of that love you seek to yourself. Pour into your own cup first before pouring into someone else's love bucket. Because the givers never know when to stop giving and the takers never know when to stop taking.

I have written about self-love before in the post down below.

To sum up my version of self-love for you, I think that embracing who you are, doing the things you love to do, without hurting others, is the uttermost best thing you can do for you. You can't embody love and go around hurting people in the name of love. That isn't how the world works. Karma has your address and trust me, she will serve you a slice of humble pie one day.

“You can be the most beautiful person in the world and everybody sees light and rainbows when they look at you, but if you yourself don't know it, all of that doesn't even matter. Every second that you spend on doubting your worth, every moment that you use to criticize yourself; is a second of your life wasted, is a moment of your life thrown away. It's not like you have forever, so don't waste any of your seconds, don't throw even one of your moments away.”

― C. JoyBell C.

You know what else love is to me?

Love is my partner refusing to yell at me during a disagreement because I flinch at the most random things after being a domestic violence victim. I didn't even realize that I still flinch until he pointed it out one day.

Love is telling someone the truth, no matter how painful it is.

And maybe that is a part of my journey on this planet is to be open and honest about my stories about love and why I closed my heart off for so many years.

Because it is not worth it. Closing yourself off to love blocks you from receiving it when you probably need it the most. I've accepted that I hurt people in the name of love along the way, but that isn't what love is to me.

Love is loving and being loved by someone.

Love is remembering the small details about someone.

Love is loyalty.

People like to say you have only one true soulmate but I don't think that is true.

I hope my children are so full of self-love that they never go looking for love in the wrong places.

We all carry shit around with us. From our parents, from our childhood, from past romantic partners, hell, even from friends that broke our hearts.

But wouldn't it be nice, if we all just went around treating everyone the way we want to be treated? Wouldn't the world be better if we operated from our hearts rather than our heads?

My partner is an Earth angel. I strive to be more like him in the way he treats others. He is the most patient, and forgiving person that I have ever met. Even when he's mad at someone, he still operates from the heart rather than his head. He cares so deeply about people and his friends and family have no idea how blessed they truly are to have a person like that in their lives. I'm so lucky to have a person like that help me raise my children. They lucked out in the dad department that's for sure.

Love day is rapidly approaching, and I think that children embody love better than adults do because emotions are so intense when you're a child. My son for instance wants to give every girl in his class a huge Valentine's Day heart and I thought to myself- "Who taught you that?" and then I realized, we did. He learned how to love people through us, the adults in his life. He witnessed my partner bringing home roses and sushi for me one day, just because.

No human is perfect, but there are perfect moments. That was one of them.

In closing, I think that the more we operate from self-love, the healthier our relationships around us become. I think that taking some life lessons in love from our children also help us as adults who struggle with love. When you're constantly pouring from that empty cup, you are left with nothing at the end of the day. But when your love cup is full to the brim, you can have more meaningful relationships instead of the obligation that you need to do something. Because love is a choice, not an obligation for me.

You choose to love others.

Thanks for reading my early morning ramblings on love.

Chloe Rose Violet🌹