The Pandemic

This story took a turn for the best starting off, because before we get into what happened during my time in the pandemic my life was hectic and a mess going into it. I had so much to write about and it was going to come off as vengeful and full of hatred. I was that upset how I was when I kept running the scenario back in my head of my life starting to fall apart. As an over thinker I tend to process situations that don't seem to add up very slowly. The thing is I am a different over thinker, I will fix the problem in the long run and go back and fix what happened in time. Someone today taught me that it isn't worth it and I truly appreciate that woman. I appreciate the man upstairs for giving me a woman who is beyond beautiful, creative, and knows how to care for me emotionally.

I am guessing you already understand where this story was going to go, in coast to coast I mentioned how I decided to come to Arizona based off of a suggestion. That suggestion was from someone who covers things and moves on, which I understand from there point of view now. I was very immature about a lot of things and the pandemic put me in my place. It was all for good reason though, I learned though my creativity can reach heights when times get tough. I might seem like I knew that already, as you can tell I am on another wave though. I always could write, but not like in a way that can pull me out of a situation that I didn't believe I could.

At the starting of the pandemic I was already going down hill, I was just kind of cruising through life. I was trying to learn a different skill to pay for away to get back to the career goal of becoming a professional GT one driver. Things were not going to well, I was dealing with a lot of people who thought they knew everything and there was just a lot of talking about small minded things with people who have no goals. People played the pity card a lot, I did it to myself. I take full blame,but people suck sometimes and in life we just have to better and if you can bury them mentally. I would say physically, but we all don't know how to get away with murder.

The COVID started to come about and it was showing up on the news, I just went back to working in the kitchen, but not working my way to a chef. I went back to plan A hustle for the goal, a couple months before COVID started world domination, I was almost there to. I had a comeback like no other which was crazy, here is how it fell apart and it almost happened again in Arizona. I started to get big headed, but it wasn't arrogance this was confidence with thinking too far ahead. When that happens you will be put in a position to give up your goal and forget about it or fall and raise back up and show people you can do it. A ticket for a meal which had an allergy attached to it, I was told not to take control of the kitchen. I was just put in a position to lead, but apparently since other people have put in work there whole life in the kitchen I had to give them a chance. I was asked by the chef in training to make the dish regular, because apparently no one is allergic to butter. I was baffled and I told him no and walked out on my job, it was stupid yes, but fuck that I am not on a level of taking a risk like that.

That was the start of a real down fall because we were 3 weeks away from COVID's world take over as it was already starting to happen. I went back to changing oil,but not at a dealership. It was for a substation company and it was depressing, I also forgot to mention my car broke down and was impounded,because for some reason the other person on the other side of the phone at the insurance desk failed to finish sending the claim. The car had payments due on it and it was just backing up so I just let it run up. Then the pandemic finally started happening, people falling out and scrambling basically end of the world. As you can see it isn't the end of the world yet,but it looked like it.

I was driven out of my room by another few people I lived with at the time,because they thought it was a hoax. They heard rent free and heard I was trying to skip out on rent. People kept calling me things that weren't true and basically tried to decapitate a king. Not today bitch, but unfortunately everyone you thought you made friends with in the last 3 years aren't your friends if they saw you fail at your goal and claim they want to help, you just are realizing you helped the wrong fuckers.

I was taken in by old co workers that still had a house they shared now one of them was real out of all the people there about the situation. It wasn't enough though, trouble still came a foot and it was my last straw. I was told by some kid who thought he had money because he was a bartender and he had a troubling past with his mom that I belong on the streets. I threw his ass into the wall and put a hole in it with him, I had no time for this crap anymore. I didn't apologize and I am sorry if you think it was too much,but I always stood up for myself.

I was then transported by someone I looked up to for having a car that I still love as a car enthusiast to safe place till I moved away. I tried to respect him, but he was always paranoid I was going to take his car. I finally let him go once I had everything together in Arizona, I am not fully together yet though. I was just tired of having memories from the pandemic replaying in my head, but I finally let it go. It wasn't till today at work reflecting on this story and finally taking a mental break to go see the beautiful woman that came in my life during tough times. So sometimes you have to go through bad to have good, it isn't all happily ever after. I am growing very well as a human though, actually I am blossoming like a Rose.

I learned to create a better life in Arizona,but also start killing my goals while I build a life. Working hard in life towards your goal does attract the right people in life that you need, you will know when they show up. I appreciate both bad and good people though, we all are humans just know I still have knowledge not to let you play me. After this publication though it is time to start writing about my new adventures, I have to do what I say and move forward.