The 3 Problems Preventing People From Finding Happiness

We live in a world today where so many people are seeking Happiness.

Yet, it also appears that we are living in the unhappiest of times.

Even though the world is at its most technologically advanced, most socially equal (not perfect, sure, but better than it has ever been in history), and with the most access to information, we are struggling more than ever to find happiness.

Why is this?

What is preventing us from finding Happiness?

Why is it important for Leaders to understand?

➼ The Result Problem

The first problem we find is that most people think that "happiness" is a result.

They believe it's a result after we attain something.

A Title.

Money.

Influence.

Any number of other things.

Yet, there are many people with ALL of these things, and who are still completely and truly unhappy.

How is that?

It is because "happiness" has never been a "result".

From a psychophysiological standpoint, we are at our happiest when we are in Flow States.

This is when we feel our best, do our best, become extremely creative, and are better able to solve our problems.

However Flow States themselves aren't a "result".

Instead, Flow States are a "Process".

They are part of a 4 Step cycle that we must go through, again and again, in order to be at our happiest.

The cycle goes: Struggle ➼ Release ➼ Flow ➼ Recover

It repeats itself again and again, and there is no "result" within it.

The more frequently you are able to get into Flow States, the happier you become.

There is also a further key within this - we have to get into Flow States by doing things we are good at ourselves (or are working on becoming good at).

It is possible to get into "Micro-Flow" by watching others succeed at high levels - such as when people watch professional sports.

However, these are only micro-moments of experiencing Flow, and aren't nearly as satisfying as Flow States that come from our own activities.

If you want more Happiness, you find it by going through the Flow "Process" more often.

➼ The Struggle Problem

This brings us to the second problem - Struggle.

In the Flow process, it is a requirement to go through the "Struggle" phase.

There are two ways most people get this wrong.

One is that the vast majority of people try to run away from Struggle.

If you never go through Struggle, you will never be able to get into a Flow State that truly makes you happy.

By running away from the Struggle, you are literally causing yourself unhappiness.

The other way people go wrong is that they Struggle "too much".

This prevents them from being able to hit the next stage of the Flow Cycle, which is "Release".

When you push yourself too far or have too many other problems occurring simultaneously, you literally become unable to "Release" the Struggle.

This isn't always your fault though - we live in a hyper-stressed world and many aspects of it make it difficult "NOT" to Struggle a lot!

However, you need to find the right balance of enough Struggle without going overboard.

This occurs roughly at about 4% more challenging than whatever your current skill level is within whatever you are doing.

A huge factor in finding this balance is understanding Dis-Stress and working to reduce it overall in today's world.

➼ The After-Effect Problem

The final problem we come into is actually AFTER we finish Flow States.

Flow States themselves are "Autotelic", which means we enjoy them for no other reason than themselves.

It's not about any money, or goal achievement, or title we could receive from whatever we do - The Flow State itself is the greatest reward to our happiness.

After we get into a Flow State, we desire to get into it again as quickly as possible.

However, this can become a challenge.

From a Mitochondrial perspective, Flow States require a LOT of energy to get into (The technical term for energy is Mg-ATP).

However, it takes time and a variety of other factors to get enough Mg-ATP to get back into Flow States.

This is where Recovery becomes important.

If we are unable to recover - whether due to a lack of minerals required, improper diet, too much Dis-Stress in our lives, not enough sleep, conflicts in our identity or psychology, and more - then we literally become unable to get back to Flow States.

We simply won't have enough energy (Mg-ATP) to achieve the Flow State.

So psychologically we will be driven to get into the Flow State (Struggle), but because we don't have enough energy (Mg-ATP) we literally are unable to reach it.

Our Struggle will increase, but there won't be a result.

Over time, we tend to do one of two things.

We either go "Flow Hopping" and attempt to find Flow by any other means.

But it always ends the same - we don't have enough energy so Flow always eludes us.

The other way it can go is that we simply give up.

Psychologically we can only handle failing so much before we give up.

When people talk about, "The Good Old Days", they have gone past the point of giving up.

It's a sad place to be, and more people are finding themselves there (often due to factors they aren't aware of).

However, the good news is that ALL of this can be overcome with the right understanding of our Psychophysiology!

➼ Importance To Leadership Success

You may be wondering - as a Leader, why do I care about these "happiness" problems?

Great question, thanks for asking!

These problems are all being experienced right NOW by everyone you lead!

Their level of "experienced happiness" will impact their work.

As a Leader, you have the ability to gain an understanding of these problems and to help those you lead through them.

Doing this will unlock all kinds of potential in your team.

If you can help someone experience "true" happiness at any point in their life, and you can help them experience it frequently, you will LITERALLY change their entire life.

This is how you create things like safety, dedication, productivity, accountability, and more on your teams!

Helping your teams find the Flow States in their lives, encouraging it, and fostering it with them, will lead to untold levels of success!