Strong People Need Care Too

Everyone knows that one person in their life who is commonly referred to as the “strong person”. We know what they look like. It’s that person we go to when we’re having a little too much trouble with our everyday struggles. The strong person is the friend to the world who always has a shoulder to lean on and keeps an extended hand to those who need lifting up, even when those who need lifting are complete strangers. Strong people are like superheroes to us, no different than Batman or Superman right? But more often than not, the strong person is the one who actually needs the most help.

I’ve always been a big movie/tv nerd and the tv show Angel, which is the spin-off to Buffy the Vampire Slayer, is pretty much my favorite live action show ever. The show is centered around a formerly evil vampire who has now dedicated his life to being a hero and protecting the innocent. The title character does so much to help other people find redemption and save their souls that people look at him as a very divine being, benevolent beyond words right? At the same time, this strong willed character is so charismatic and captivating because of everything he does for others that no one really ever checks on him to see how he is doing or if he is in need of saving. Towards the end of the series one of his dearest friends addresses this in his presence and he doesn’t even have much of a response to it.

This Angel reference is a real life metaphor for what the strong people we love in reality deal with everyday. How many of us know that person we can talk to and vent our frustrations of life to when life just starts life-ing more than usual. This is that person who would give the shirt off their back for a complete stranger, the person who you could call in the middle of the night if you were in a jam and they would spare no expense at being there for you. This person also never asks for anything in return because they don’t want anything in return. They just want everything to be okay, they just want you to be okay.

The thing about these caretakers is we are so use to how strong they are and how much they take care of other people that we don’t realize how much they need to be taken care of as well, sometimes even more than those they help. Perhaps no one struggles more than the strong friend, wanna know why? Because of their strength they don’t really have much to lean on. They are always lending a listening ear and offering a kind word to others, but no one ever thinks to give them that same support because it seems like a person that strong doesn’t need any kind of support with all the good they put out.

The fact at matter is these caretakers struggle too, but they carry such a well put together demeanor and they’re so adamant on making sure everyone else is okay that they will rarely show or tell that they are not okay, so their struggles often go unnoticed until they become overwhelmed and a blowout happens. Trust and believe that when the strong person finally loses it they crash harder than everyone else because they were bottling up so much more pain.

Sometimes the strong person doesn’t think anyone cares, so they feel like they can’t express their burdens. Sometimes they’re so overwhelmed with taking care of everyone else that they burn out and cover up the damage of building up to an ugly head, so what should be done about this? CHECK ON YOUR STRONG FRIENDS!!!

I want you to think about that strong person or people in your life who has always been a shoulder to lean on and someone you can go to when life gets rough. Make it a habit to check on that person and even just casually see how they are doing. You don’t have to be the superhero who saves their souls, but try making a habit out of being there for them just like they are there for you. Every now and then become a shoulder for them to lean on and an ear that will listen to their problems that they may not be big on expressing. Even a hero needs a hero.

We all need to make a habit out of supporting our strong friends. Let them know that it’s okay for them to express that they are not okay and that they can be vulnerable when they are struggling. They deal with a lot of issues of which we are unaware and if we don’t make attempts to humanize them and keep them from falling when they feel weak then the world will lose some of its most precious treasures. Be a source of support for the strong people in your life.