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starting over

doing what I wanted, not what I needed

By ASHLEY SMITHPublished 2 years ago 3 min read
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begin again

I had kids young and so became a grown up early. Luckily got a well paid job and became normal and average. Going to work 5 or 6 days a week, earning good money but spending it all on grown up bills. Especially as my ex wife was allergic to paying bills.

Both our kids were disabled and therefore we got some benefits to cover extra costs. She received it and spent most on herself or takeaways as she was too lazy to cook. Once the kids were old enough it was time to finish for my own health. I left and went back to my home town and started over again.

Through the care of my kids I studied disabilities, worked with numerous specialists and volunteered at the schools. It was time I loved, especially the time I spent helping in the kids classrooms. I loved it but pay was too low for the bills, the job I had paid well but I hated it. Now was time to do what I wanted.

I started by living alone in shared homes before the start of a couple of relationships. I moved in both times and am now 5 years in to the relationship I have now. Both women were carers and I met them where i worked. It means our income isn't great but I enjoy it far more then any job before. I support disabled adults with their day to day life. I help them with food preparation, personal health and all aspects of their life. Its minimum wage but more personally worthwhile then anything that's been before.

I have gone through the qualifications and now am qualified to management level , though this is still probably worse pay then I had before. This is still where I want to be, I haven't got to a management job yet but will aim for one soon. I know I can do it but I prefer the hands on job of helping people personally.

I would like to think I could earn more in another job, I have decided that for now I would rather be happy. I would like to think after 31 years of experience I know quite well what I am doing. I help other staff with advice and suggestions, I give ideas to management if I think its worth it also.

Its just me and my partner now, we would love more money but not at present. She is much younger then me but earns more then me. We enjoy each others company, play computer games together and we are getting married next year. We just have enough money to get by.

I get reward and fulfilment from helping some one make a meal or tie their own shoes. I make sure they have their medication on time and stay as safe as possible, all which are my rewards. Them smiling or saying thank you is what I do it for.

I am lucky enough to have the patience and experience so why not use it. While my body and mind stays ok I will try and help others who struggle mentally or physically. Maybe when my mind or body starts to fail then hopefully there's someone like me to look after me. That might be someone who has cared for many years or someone who started late.

At time of writing bills are rising and wages aren't so I might have to make some changes. I may have to either look for promotion within the care industry or return to life outside of care work. I don't want to but might not have a choice. I just wish this career was as financially rewarding as it is emotionally.

career
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About the Creator

ASHLEY SMITH

England based carer, live with my wife, her parents and 4 cats. will write for all areas but especially mental health and disability. though as stuff for filthy seems popular will try there . any comments, suggestions or requests considered

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