Sometimes It's Not All About You

Ok. For a writer, it is usually all about you. It’s your thoughts, experiences, and opinions on the page. That's the whole point, right?

But the road to becoming the world's next Zadie Smith or Michal Chabon, is not a sprint; it's a marathon. It’s going to take time, probably years. Anyone who’s been on a marathon would know you need to smile at your fellow companions on the journey to keep your spirits up, or else you’re not going to make it.

My preference leans towards wanting to be alone. Getting away from all that troublesome human interaction. I've learned, it doesn’t help my creativity.

I have friends whose minds are a buzz of activity and inspiration, a constant stream of new ideas at all times. But when I’m in the still and quiet, my mind shuts down. My thoughts stop flowing. I sink into a malaise. What’s the point? Why do anything?

I need stimulation, something coming in from the outside. Like a paper shredder working in reverse, I need a flow of little tidbits to piece together to put into new ideas. Is this what ADHD feels like? I’m not sure.

I like background noise, so I do most of my writing while in coffee shops. Right now, I'm in one. At the table across, I hear the back and forth of a business meeting. A woman with a posh sounding Australian accent introduces herself to a man who has the appearance and manner of someone in business. I eavesdrop. There are thank-yous for things that have happened. They discuss people they know, that I obviously don’t. Is this a sales meeting? If so, who is selling whom? Or is this something illicit? Or illegal? My mind races with the possibilities.

I think I have a new story…I begin to write.

But, how to write well, I ask myself. I’ve watched dozens of educational videos with eye-catching titles such as “Improve Your Writing in 10 Steps.” They all have the same advice: use short sentences, write with strong verbs, don’t use adverbs…verbs are engaging, visually describing the scene with “is/was” sentences is so 19th century.

I recently learned that a teacher at the Iowa Writers Workshop was very fond of Raymond Carver. He taught his students to write like Raymond Carver. These students became teachers and taught their students, and within a few generations of student-teacher turnover, the staccato style of Raymond Carver’s writing has spread across the English-speaking/writing world.

Countless YouTube videos later, I have mastered these ideals. So, for new inspiration, I open one of my favorite books: Anthony Bourdain’s “Kitchen Confidential.”. This book is packed full of colorful characters, vivid arguments in the kitchen, wildly excessive sex and drug use. It’s amazing. I want to write like this! I take a close look at his prose and sentence structure. And it’s stuffed to the gills with adverbs and adjectives, and has sentences that go on and on and stretch to paragraph length. All the things the 'experts' tell us not to do. But it works, brilliantly.

I believe we are all on a writing journey to learn what works for us. A marathon of writing and feedback from readers, and discovering “our” voice, the one that connects with readers. The one that moves people to read on and feel what we feel.

But, I’m not Anthony Bourdain, not even close.

Last week, a story I entered into a competition was brutally rejected. Damn. I was certain it was my best in a long while. I wanted to shout at my screen and fire off angry messages to everyone connected to this conspiracy to reject my entry.

“Don’t rage,” I tell myself. “It's not all about you.”

Before doing anything rash, I need to pause. I scroll down the list of entries to the competition, and find a few writers' names I don’t recognize, and have any received any likes or comments. I take a deep breath, and then completely immerse myself in another writer’s story.

A day later, I receive this:

It brought me to tears to read this too.

Treasure the effect you can have on your fellow writer. It's not all about you. Scroll through the Latest Submissions list of a Vocal Challenge that you have submitted to. Find a title and opening paragraph that catches your eye. Devote 10 minutes immersing yourself in the story. Read it, searching out what you like. Turn off your inner critic and tell them three things you like about their story. Give water to those promising seeds, and you may see new flowers of creativity bloom.