Non stop soul searching

So, we are always looking for validation through likes and dislikes, re-posts and re-tweets on every form of social media, if we don`t get it we feel disappointed in our lives. Am I right or am I right?! We are also looking for validation from the people around us, sometimes we get it and sometimes we don`t, which is actually pretty disappointing in many ways... We are quick to change our look or behaviour just because others don`t like it. We go shopping for clothes others like, get a hairstyle others like, but in the other hand we might not love them so much. We do it for acceptance and getting the validation that lifts our feels goods. But where are we in these scenarios?! Good question, huh?!

The other day I decided to take a short online class on content creating and the teacher wanted us to ask people who are close to us, our friends about what unique traits did we get that they like about us and write them down. Well... I went into this pretty sceptical about it, I didn`t think I was anything but average. The fun stuff about this was that this time we weren`t asking validation about things like appearance, style, success ..., it was all about personality. Let me tell you, I got some really surprising ones. For some of them, I was like "Really?! Well... I kinda am like that, but really?!" I didn`t know how people see me by the likes and dislikes on my posts and such. I felt like I asked a question, but I wasn`t ready for the answer, which was true. I was happy to see that I wasn`t the person, I thought I was, also that I was better to other, than I was with myself. So, I would encourage everyone to do the exact same and see how people who love you actually see you as a person.

As they say, communication is the key in relationships and in friendships alike. We talk and we sometimes listen, but do we ever discuss openly how do we feel about each other or how do we see the other person?! I don`t mean, romantic friendships, I mean everything else. When was the last time you had a conversation with a friend of you about their qualities, the good ones. We are pretty quick telling each other and people in general what we don`t like. We tell people that they are rude, they are selfish, they are bad listeners, … But do we ever tell them that they are kind, they are strong, they mean a lot to us or even just give them a genuine compliment?! I know, that most of us not so good at taking a compliment, maybe even worse than giving one. Why is that though?! Why are we so quick to point out the negative and so slow to point out things that could actually build someone up?!

We live in a world where it`s the normal thing to do, but it is still not the right thing to do. When pulling people down became normal?! When did we decide that we are going to do this, and that`s fine?! Nowadays, we struggle seeing ourselves as we are and we are looking for acceptance from others. We struggle with body dysmorphia, mental health issues and they all deeply rooted at the same place. Wouldn`t it be easier to treat people well and make people feel better about themselves?!

You know, this assignment came just in the right time for me. My life is straight up falling apart, almost every way it`s possible, but knowing that my friends see me as a person who is worth loving gives me some hope to get through it all somehow. Don`t know how yet, but somehow someday. This opened my eyes and helped me better understand this whole situation and how to change it. Now I know, how some people around me see me and helps me see myself from a different perspective. This assignment was maybe for me, but it could open up doors for you as well. Try it!