Memoirs of Iyjana: Spring

Wed: 03222017

“I feel okay, a few lingering metaphysical knots/‘nots’ but I know what I must do to unravel them. What I find myself wanting a lot of the “time”, is a clean slate, just to do it all over again, a few minor changes here & there…

the closest thing to anything of that sort is a detox & cleanse, a metaphysical detox & cleanse. I’ve been noticing the intertwining fundamental nature of our continuum of existence, of course I’ve been aware of the fact that all things are connected, but for some reason my experience has been blowing into proportion, the likes of “how & why” things are, within every fiber of my Being.

For example, all things existing via electromagnetism;from planets, “space”, atoms, cells, people, thoughts, feelings….all things are just massive, minute, microcosmic vibrations/versions/visions/reflections of ‘ourselves/cells.’”

Thurs: 03232020

“Like many, I’m being forced to recognize weight; mental, spiritual, emotional alike. I find I’ve been making excuses as to why I allow & engage with certain ppl & things to enter my world over & over & over & over again…searching for greater meaning when the key is simply understanding the lesson always at hand:

things come & go. I have no problem letting go of ppl I Love, because I look forward to who comes back. I pedastalize the saying “if you Love something, let it go, if it returns, it was always yours.”

My infatuation with the idea of falling madly in Love incapacitates me to the point of crippled discernment. I’m allured to forbidden Love & romantic tragedy like a moth to flame. There’s apart of me reluctant to men with clear & pure intentions to Love every part of me, &

I’m not exactly sure why that is.”

Fri: 03242017

“& I promise…

If you ever

Step foot

On the landscape

Of my heart again,

It Will open up

Like the Earth Herself

& swallow you to depths

You have never,

Ever been.”

...

“Each day, I feel so much more amazing, so much more secure within the chaotic atmosphere we All share as re-ality. Insights have been knocking—tapping on my Soul’s window…as the storm rages inward/outward, backward/forward, bottom to top, I’ve been assimilating bits & pieces of information that sync periodically throughout my journey, & each time the puzzle becomes more complete, more whole.

The feeling of this completion is similar to the joy one feels after unlocking a certain ability within the characters of video games. & then it hit me: knowledge r e a l l y is power.

I can feel the surge of energy felt by my psyche, or motion in the gears of the naked observer’s perceptual organs…that only possess a “psyche” in the first place due to being born into multiplicity & subjectivity.

That is what life & death is…experiencing the ever-changing existence & progression of consciousness."

Sat: 03252020

“I’ve been going back in time. Collecting myself over the last 2.5 decades. The collage of who & what I am is drawing near in sight, more & more of what I’ve carried in linearity, is falling like a cocoon from a butterfly.

I’ve been reluctant to diving into my emotions because it’s difficult to fly with damp wings. However, the process of drying—of strengthening, is a path & experience that is absolutely unavoidable, & I grow more & more grateful for it as I walk the shore of who I am beyond the cocoon.

I’m learning to trust my heart, for as painful as the lessons it has to offer are, we are stronger than our growing pains; we are wiser than divisiveness.

Like eyes that’ve never seen the Sun, Truth can hurt when it cuts through our illusions & attachments. Tumors of the Heart & Mind are never malignant, & as beings of Awareness, we have the power & opportunity to amputate these tumors before dis-ease &/or physical Death do it for us.

Now is the Time to let go, Now is the Time to surrender,

align & reclaim that which was before you,

that which is with you,

& that which is

the Ever-Present capacity of creating the future.

Send.

Receive.

Expand.”