Enough With The Buzz Words

Note To Reader: This will be the first and very last time I have an opinion on this. Conversations such as this one don't feed my mind and soul. I would instead do something more productive like shadow work, meditating, going to therapy, and healing my inner child. I can't constantly entertain the foolishness that comes out of people's mouths, and most importantly, I am not a feminist.

I'm noticing a huge trend on social media that is pissing me off. Social media is the land of "buzz words" what I mean by this is we have introduced a word, and then everyone says that word in the wrong context but continues to use those words because it gets clicks, views and at times becomes viral. The internet is making me dislike the terms feminine and masculine. Bloggers, YouTubers, and those who have podcasts love to give an opinion on someone's "manhood" and "womanhood" based on outdated characteristics. I'm always confused why people want to know my opinion on such topics. Some may say that they value my opinion others want to know where my head is. I don't give three fucks about simple words and what I think they mean; this will be long, so if you're looking for good reading material or something to sip your coffee over, I would advise you to keep reading.

One thing I've noticed with people on the internet is people love to point the finger. "You're not being this" and "You're not doing that." Before you play the blame game, you will always have four fingers pointing back at you as you entertain yourself pointing one finger. I bet it feels good to give attention to someone else's faults. But what I've come to realize is those "you did it" people are the unhappiest, insecure, and lack self-love. People get so excited at pointing, laughing, and criticizing someone else's shit that you fail to smell your own.

What Is Divine Feminine?

I feel the need to break some of these terms down for context and help you all say these terms in the correct context. People throw around this term a lot, especially men who have never had a period or given birth to a child.

"The Divine Feminine refers to a face of the divine spirit that is connected with the body, nature, and the cycles of creation and transformation"- Bustle

"Embracing the sacred feminine is about fully realizing her divine essence, standing in all her power, and creating a more harmonious world; this doesn't mean we are operating only from our feminine energy." Goop

Here is where context comes into play; nothing in this definition states anywhere you should love and treat your man. Having divine femininity is "sacred," which means the only person who knows is a woman and whomever you decide to tell. Those who create rants and have an hour podcast about being feminine don't know a damn thing. Society and personal experience have created a perception that may or may not be accurate. If I tell a man I have cramps, and the man says, "no, you don't," who are you to tell me MY pain level.

I'm so glad men don't have periods because I feel like their ego will have them comparing tampon sizes on which ones are more prominent. There will be things about women men will never understand, and there will be things about men women don't understand but, I will never hold that against them. All of this talk about who's feminine and who's not is just a reflection of how you view your mother. Until both sexes are willing to admit that they resent their mother, I'm ready to have a real conversation.

I would advise both men and women to sit down and think about how they view their mothers. If you've never been around women who tapped into their divine femininity, then how would you know what it is? No matter what your grades are in school, your mother and father are your first teacher. Not only are they teaching how to read and write, but seeing how your parents interact will indeed impact the way you view the opposite sex. Look at all your relationships. What attracted you to them? What was it about their characteristics kept you interested? I can guarantee that your parents show up in each person you've dated: the good, the bad, and the ugly. Until you face your demons and resentment towards your parents will show up in all of your relationships. So, who is to blame?

Divine Masculine

"The divine masculine is very action-based, focused on doing rather than being. Where the divine feminine represents Universal Motherhood, divine masculine is Universal Fatherhood energy. It's about things like structure, logic, and taking charge."- Mindbodygreen.

Nothing in this definition says anything about how to treat and love women. The three terms that people need to focus on are Structure, Logic, and taking charge. It all pertains to having a sense of self. Most people fail to realize that these terms are all spiritual-based; it's more about a mindset and a feeling rather than something being tangible. It's impossible to meet someone and dictate if they are masculine now esthetically; they may look masculine, which in many ways created through Hollywood stereotypes that impact how we should look. At this point, I think we all know looks alone can be deceiving, and everything that glitters isn't gold. Human beings love to wear masks; no, I'm not talking about medical masks or the fancy cloth ones that match your outfit; I'm talking about keeping up with society masks. Whether it be materialism, not being vulnerable, being mean-spirited, or simply just being a hater.

I saw an Instagram post that reflects my true sentiment on masculinity.

The caption reads All of these complicated terminologies. I've never used the term "toxic masculinity" and never will. And yes, I get the discourse behind the [word], but I find it duplicitous. Just like I'm not going to say, "you're negative positive." You're either positive or not. You're either Masculine or not. The core principles of masculinity are all positive traits. People choose to abuse these principles. Just like principles of feminity are all positive, some women can use their sensuality to deceive and harm. That's ego-EmpressAk.

There needs to be healing on both sides. As an African American woman, I know and am aware of breaking generational curses and how hard it can be to discuss mental health and therapy. The word struggle doesn't discriminate, and the word trauma isn't picky. If we learn how to tame our egos and listen to understand and not respond, we will realize that our struggles are the same. I think it's disgusting, disrespectful, and cheap to create material that constantly demeans and harms the other sex. I'm tired of women sitting around talking about men. I'm tired of men sitting around talking about women. How does that help your personal growth? Where are the mentors and support groups who create healthy spaces for healthy dialogue? Why are we viewing relationships and love as transactional entities? People don't even have a blueprint for building a home but want to know "what you bring to the table?" Which is one of the dumbest questions that a man or woman can ask one another; the video below explains my sentiments.

Whatever happened to just being a decent human? Treat others with respect, speak kind words, help those in need, be a voice to those afraid to say, and find your purpose in this life. Why are humans finding joy in ripping each other apart? Having a holier-than-thou mindset and no sense of humility, respect for self and others, I refuse to constantly talk about this because I have better things to do; I have dreams to chase. I'm so busy creating a space to interact with like-minded people and doing my healing work that I find conversations like these useless. What are you feeding your brain, and why? I don't listen or entertain myself with topics that I won't find help with my personal growth and evolution. Why aren't men watching and reading about becoming better men, lovers, and fathers? And why aren't women watching and reading about becoming better men, mothers, and lovers? We have to be mindful of what we feed our bodies and minds.

People would rather talk about it and not talk it out. I feel like I'm watching a terrible circus act at times. Because I always beg the question, "have you looked in the mirror?" People who watch and listen to that nonsense need help. They come off bitter and lonely and tend to blame others instead of taking accountability. Most YouTubers have a degree in bullshit. None of these people have the background and education to give sound advice. Again, most of them speak from experience, which has helped them build a negative perception. Do something better with your time instead of asking me what I think about these topics because I'm not interested. I don't entertain unhappy people.