A Higher Calling

I am invisible to most people.

To say we are event planners is to minimize our calling.

Those who pause to see me for a brief while might not even think of me. My features have become part of the background now. It's as if someone took a watercolor brush and blended me in. Not that anyone would care to invest that time in the hustle bustle of life anyway. Life unlike death, never pushes the pause button. It keeps on going. If a person really thinks of me or my life, even I become surprised. You see, I've forgotten what it is to be noticed.

My job has defined my life.

When I first started, I was animated, engaged, and my personality shone through. However, that is not what is required of me. I have aged myself, learned to recede, and engage in a larger way without being conspicuous. Somber, that is an apt description for me now.

Everyone is caught up in the emotions of the moment when them come to me. I don't blame them at all. Their associations with me are temporary. They do not wish to become repeat customers. I understand. After all, is it not part of my job to do so?

I have to wear many hats. My customers like me to be the event planner from start to finish. Everything must run like clockwork 24/7. I book the time and day of the event, select the officiant, the flowers, the service, and I also must be present for my clients emotionally.

The job also requires me to be one of the first to bring my client to my location. Our business provides cleaning up, dressing up, doing their face, hair, nails, and even providing the clothing before taking the individual to the event location. Of course, we provide choice of wearing own clothing. We also allow family members to take care of make up and dressing if they choose to.

We are respectful of every religion and ritual.

At times, I have to help prepare speeches, while at others, I may have to do some legal work, mostly managing documents. I must keep a dispassionate attitude and provide empathy and listening ears almost always. Family member choices take precedence, and I must be prepared to suggest options for my client they may not know of. Arranging different kinds of transportation is also part of my innumerable duties.

When the pandemic hit, there was a sense of trepidation to work in a changing scenario. We had to make sure we had enough protective equipment because life did not stop for us even if it did for others.

These are tenuous times. A sense of guilt also took over me when it began. I was not impervious to the fact people lost jobs and livelihoods. Parties, celebrations, and other group events came to a halt. For me, things did change in different ways. Several people lost their jobs, and finally they began to show some curiosity about my job. After all the years, they looked with new eyes at my calling. In the process, I had to endure a whole lot of snark.

"Business must be booming for you."

Such digs were becoming more common.

It's a wonder how the deliverer of this line thought he or she came up with something original. Is this humor somehow uplifting? I really have no time to dwell on this remark. This is not my first rodeo. If only I had a dime for each time someone said it....

The duties we execute while dispensing our jobs intersect several disciplines. The pay isn't reflective of the large corpus of knowledge and professionalism we wield. Even in lean economic times an occasional person pays only a little more attention to my job and income, truth be told.

Without considering disruptions in supply chains or vagaries of demand and supply, some folks manage to sneak in criticism. Contrary to their belief, we are not here to gouge people.

A sense of anxiety for PPE and job related supplies seized me when the pandemic was ravaging the world. We were running out of our business merchandise at an alarming rate. We just could not keep up. A booming business is not always a cause to celebrate.

I began to feel a strange sense of guilt. My responsibilities also increased. Business had to go on despite the pandemic and lock-downs. My guest list decreased, but my duties increased. I had to take over for the family members due to social distancing. Earlier, there was more interaction with people, but now more and more people passed on the baton to us to complete the ceremonial procedures. I truly hope I did justice to the families that reposed faith in us.

It has not been easy. Each day after work, I pour myself a stiff one. However, I cannot indulge, for I have to be ready when a call comes to pick a loved one at any time.

So why do I do what I do? It's all about purpose. My job has given me immense satisfaction. From a sensitive person, I have become stoïc now. Nothing bothers me these days. Yet, the one thing that makes me happy is providing comfort and solutions to mourners.

At a given moment, people find solace through my service. I understand they do not want a long term business relationship with me. I am associated with finiteness. I am the undertaker or funeral director. When the time comes to serve my clients, I doubt they'll even be able to say a hello.