Melting in midsummer

I know i'm not the first nor shall I be the last person to vocalise how hard the heat wave is at the moment, at forty something years old I am at the beautiful juncture of life that all women hit, that's right, perimenopausal. Let me just say if nature could put the pause on it that would be frickin fantastic! Most days are spent in a sweaty fluid heap either in the garden or in a hothouse quite literally trying to get as cool as possible,every once in a while I get a sudden burst of energy flow through me then my hormones decided a hot flash is the way to go. Then a mundane task such as hanging out the washing becomes a shower worthy experience. The task of then trying to maintain a level of dignity whilst wiping sweat out of your eyes becomes a hellish experience when you forget that you are wearing glasses to help you see and become temporarily blind as the nose pieces then end up jabbing you in the eyes. Feeling like a prize prat the descision to then just sit comfortably in the living room in front of the fan whilst seemingly the best idea yet,then became a noxious experience as,also suffering with heat,our newest addition,the cutest little terrier ever,decides that the fan is now her best friend and proceeds to "perfume" the air frequently, making the nice cool living room now such a noxious enviroment that only flies can breathe in it! In all what should have been a rather more cooling situation then ended up forcing us all back outside or upstairs to escape only to have the little perfume cloud follow us wherever we chose to retire. Fast forward to evening when the heat should abate and yet still there is no sign of relenting from the heat or the dryness of what is now afflicting the country and a new air con unit seems to be the way forward,glancing through different sites,one of my favourite being Temu, I locate a unit that says its capable of cooling a 17x17x17 room and despite the fact that I will have to endure a couple of weeks of heat it will all be worth it in the end to be able to shut off and have an acceptably cool room for us all to enjoy and its an absolute steal at half the price of a normal air con unit,what could be better?

Fast forward a week and as my parcel is delivered by land it only takes a week I'm hyper active about my bargain even though the box isn't massive i'm non too worried about it, still stands about knee height so I don't expect there will be much in the way of internal packaging. The husband is mildly interested in my bargain but does express a concern that we may need to spend a fortune in AC coolant for it and that it will eat up the electricity as it probably won't be energy efficient,only to dissolve into tears of laughter once the box is opened and reveals a desk fan that is 17 cmsx 17cmsx17cms. As if that wasn't embarrasing enough I had managed to not only misread the details for the fan but ordered a six week supply of said AC coolant in an effort to be frugal! Trying to ease the disappointment I laughed off the situation and proceeded to go and sit in the back garden in the shade,shaking my head at the hilarity the hubster clearly still felt and was vocalising I fumed all the way down to the bottom of the garden,or I would have,had I not been so preoccupied with my shame that I was nearly throttled by a pair of pajama bottoms .