When the Cheerleader Couldn't Be Saved

The series Heroes character Claire Bennet could feel pain. The difference was that she could deal with it. She could sustain devastating falls, cuts, bruises, lacerations, burns and other calamities. The actress who played her, Hayden Panettiere, felt pain, too. Only it was crushing, debilitating and completely unwarranted. In her death, she further showed the unbelievable hurt that can arise out of life.

She wrote in her personal memoir about her battles with the bottle and drugs, but from where did it all stem? It came from the viciousness of the side of fame and fortune that afflicts the best of us. She had been working in TV and film since before she could talk. The ugliness of the business of show can be devastating to anyone, especially young women. She possessed no superpowers to shelter her from the storm of paparazzi and hounding bloggers and vloggers. She knew that she had to find a way around all of this. 

Sadly, she could not find happiness because of such horrors as post-partum depression.

The crux of her world weakened even more at the death of her brother. The combination of delivering her child and knowing about the demise of her dear sibling made it suffocating. Claire could have survived all of the lack of air. Hayden couldn’t. As strong and beautiful as she showed herself to be, she could not withstand the pains of sleazy industry figures who only wanted to use her body and cast her away like a gum wrapper. This is a tale too often told in Hollywood. Some of it never mentioned by women and men adversely affected by ogres. 

Hayden Panettiere wanted desperately to be happy, but because of the impossibility of an Age of Envy as the late writer and philosopher Ayn Rand pointed out, the young star perished. People say, “but she had fame and fortune, a little girl, the world!” The reality is that she was swallowed up by the camera lenses and the flashing lights of folks who never cared about her. Now, they cry crocodile tears to attempt to compensate for their vicious behavior. 

What Hayden Panettiere had going for her collapsed on her like so many bricks in an earthquake. In fact, she called the rough spots in her brief existence “lifequakes.” Those moments when everything just shook the foundation of an otherwise stable individual and tested her resolve. Even with good relationships she had with sponsorships, one showed no resolve or care after she was dropped from the company. With a million watt smile and blonde hair and wondrous facial features, she also had the acting chops.

But none of that mattered. The idea that she relinquished full custody of her daughter to ex-fiancé Wladimir Klitschko, made her broken but not deterred.

She even sat down for an extended interview and read from her personal journal. This was not a passage from her memoir. This was her dearest diary. And she showed ache and somehow wonder through all she had gone through in this life. The ugliness of some figures in an industry that has welcomed, embraced, and cast away mostly actresses could have been faced down by Claire. She would’ve known that the anguish and agony she experienced would have evaporated like a drop of water on a hot skillet. For Hayden Panettiere, this was not the case. She braved this life with as much fervor and truth as anyone could know. She, yet, could not be Claire. 

The envy that is present in this current existence is so puny and vapid that it only casts shadows. It never fully reveals itself and can only win if you let it. Sadly, Hayden Panettiere let it. The same singer of Nashville fame witnessed scripts that reflected ideas of substance abuse, mental illness, and other happenings in her life. She launched head first into these issues and never wavered despite the personal associations involved. Instead, she knew she could become a better human being despite the monsters who sought to swallow her up whole. 

The superpowers that Claire possesses seemed to always be a way for her to deal with any obstacle that she faced. Hayden Panettiere was that woman warrior who looked at the trials and tribulations of life and still had enough stamina to go on in human form. With calamities she sought the grace of reality and the beauty of nature. Rather than sulking and seeking pity from anyone, she transformed her dolor into determination. Despite all of the snares that appear on this pavement into the horizon, she showed herself to be the only one who could have saved her. 

In this world, Hayden Panettiere represented the radiant bombshell who could charm a room and enchant any man she encountered. This brought out the talons of the men and women who knew too well that she could be twisted and turned. But she had her awareness of people who sought to take advantage of her. Perhaps inspired by her fire chief grandfather, she knew that she could battle against any adversity. What she did know remained the might of the mind to come out swinging at all times. Maybe that’s why she wanted a boxer to give her a child. She had the spirit of a pugilist. She just kept beating herself up. This is the saddest part of her story. Because Hayden Panettiere fought like someone devoted and always challenging what she could do with her mind and body. 

Her individualism shone through with lines like, "Some people ask me whether I'm a 'mama's girl' or a 'papa's girl'. I'm nobody's girl." This glimpse of light,  a spark, really, nourished the fire in her soul burning with an intensity of showing excellence and the greatness squashing out collectivism. She cared about herself so much but the world ate her alive. All of the while, Hayden Panettiere struggled but survived and became more than a conqueror, as the faithful say. Her ability to use her splendid appearance and her physicality to her roles spilled off the screen into her real life. 

It’s just too bad that no one could save the cheerleader.  She was rooting more for everyone else and not enough for herself. That’s the real tragedy.