The Moonflower

She let her thoughts flow freely, instead of trying to control them. Same with her emotions. She was left alone again after letting her guard down but strangely enough, the storm inside of her was calm. But her sadness made it storm around her. She couldn’t cry so the sky did for her.

Her soul was dull, she was numb. She wanted to feel something but she couldn’t feel anything at all.

The vision she had, had once again been distorted by the one she opened up to, the one she waited so long for. She wanted him more than she could ever want another man. He was her light, her Moonflower, her love, her motivation... Her future. She wanted to make memories with him, explore with him, love him, care for him.

But her happiness was stolen by the time she woke up. She lost her breath, she lost all feeling in her precious soul. She wanted to feel something, anything. But she fought so much for the last one, she barely had any fight left. Her mind started to go blank and she started to feel scared. Her vision she loved and cherished so much was fading, but there was nothing she could do. She was frozen, and just out of reach.

Well, she’s just right back where she was and it’s a very familiar place. She’s known this place for so long. It’s starting to feel like home. She’s welcome and wanted there. She knows her way around....loneliness.

She wants so bad to reach for him, to call him, to hear his voice, see his beautiful eyes that she could get lost in for hours. She’d miss the way he would look at her, the way he’d take her breath away. She felt so safe, so certain about this one. But no one seems to love the color purple for very long, they find a color closer to theirs instead.

No matter how far out of reach he got, she still searched for him, craving him more than ever. She missed the way his eyes looked into her soul, the way he would serenade her. She just missed watching that beautiful creature exist. He didn’t know how special he was to her. He’d probably never know. He was so beautiful and so precious. She wanted to love him, she wanted to be with him. She wanted to let him feel the love he deserved, the love he thought he didn’t. She saw HIM, and he was absolutely beautiful. Her heart and soul aches without him, it’s lonely and quiet without his energy. She doesn’t know what it is about his soul, but it captivated her. He was a masterpiece, he gave her life direction. To be with HIM was like living in the stars. Such beauty. She just wanted to be the one he chose, the one that took his breath away, the one that made his body tremble with just one touch, the one he couldn’t wait to see laying next to him in the morning.

She tried to be what he needed, she begged and punched that brick wall till her knuckles were bruised and broken.

Her knuckles bled. She couldn’t get through.

She had no choice but to give up. She didn’t want to, but her hands had no strength left. She still doesn’t want to let him go, how could she ever want to? Should she?

Will her beautiful Moonflower need to be replanted? Will this one stay forever closed?

I guess we’ll have to wait and see. But sometimes, we end up waiting for nothing...