The Kiss (Chapter 2 - By the Cover)

Nathan

I blinked, opening my eyes to the bright sunlight streaming through the bay window into the lounge. I sat up on the sofa, finding Rose lying next to me, still asleep despite the bright morning light. I never noticed how beautiful she was. Sleeping next to me, she looked so peaceful, her dark hair cascading loosely over her shoulders. It must have escaped during the night. I spied the green elastic she always kept it in lying on the ground, unconsciously discarded. I liked it better that way, a few wisps playing wildly over her milky, pale skin.

She stirred just then, shifting on the sofa away from the light. Away from me. I almost pulled her back, but stopped: I didn't have the heart to wake her. I stood up slowly and headed for the stairs, hoping she would still be asleep when I got back. Creeping carefully up the notoriously loud, uncarpeted staircase, I grabbed some clothes from my bedroom wardrobe and went to take a quick shower. My clothes had been so damp from the stifling lounge, I had to peel them off. The cold water felt good, the chill successfully driving away the haze of sleep. My mum had forgotten to get the water heater fixed before deciding to leave a week early for her trip. There was a week left before school closed for the Christmas holiday and she hadn't come home last night, not even bothering to mention that she had changed her ticket. Maybe she was tired of making excuses and I had long grown tired of hearing them. Maybe it was for the best. Mum and I had very few traditions, but this one would probably stick and I was fine with that.

Christmas had never been the same with my dad gone. When he died, mum just stopped trying. She had never been the motherly type; she probably wouldn't have become one if my dad hadn't wanted kids so badly. She had always seemed to care more about her job than us. She got promoted to the chief adviser to her company's founder when I was two, using it as an excuse to stay at the office most nights and go on monthly business trip. A lot of the time it was just dad and I when he wasn't traveling, when one or the other was busy with work, I was with my Nan, Joanna. My dad and I spent a lot of holidays with Rose and her mum. Mine seemed to find a reason to be gone more often during the fall and winter months, so I used to pretend Rose's mum was my mum.

For the summer holidays, when my dad was away on a trip and mum took her annual family-free vacation to a Swiss health spa, I went with Rose to her grandfather's farm in Ireland. With my dad gone, I spent every holiday with the Willows. Mrs. Willow treated me like family. When I was little I had been jealous of Rose for having such an amazing mum—a real mum that cared for you when you were sick, that kissed every little scrape, and didn't need to hire another woman to mother their child. And most all to be there for you when your dad dies.

I loved being over at the Willow's and wasn't sure what I would do if they moved away. This could happen but I didn't want to think about it.

Flipping the shower off, I shook the water out of my hair. The spray had become frigid and the soap had long since been washed out. I stepped out and wrapped a towel around my waist. I heard the floors creak down on the main level, so I slipped into my jeans and pulled a t-shirt over my head. When I got downstairs, Rose was in the kitchen putting on a pot of tea. Out the window, I could see that the roads had finally been cleared. That meant there would be school today. I sighed audibly. Rose turned and smiled, handing me a mug. Rose took her tea upstairs to get ready. Her mum must have dropped off her uniform on her way to work early this morning. It was only 7am so I made breakfast while I waited for her. We would have to take the bus, which didn't come till 8am, so we had plenty of time. Even though my mum had had the company's driver take her to the airport, I wouldn't get my license until next year, so I couldn't take the car.

"Oh shit," Rose screamed.

I rushed upstairs, worried, practically running into Rose I sped through the already open bathroom door. She turned around and I flinched, not even having a chance to hide my initial shock. Her mum had accidentally dropped off Rose's old glasses, the ones she hadn't worn since Brittany had started calling her owl eyes in year 8. They were big oval lenses with gold rims. Her piercing blue pupils had been magnified by ten times. Rose had been forced to wear them again for two months during the summer holiday last year while she waited for her new ones. Had they seen her, Brittany and her minions would have never let her hear the end of it. Luckily, the three of them had been vacationing in the Bahamas on the White family yacht, the amount of wealth Mr. White amassed, and subsequently wasted was actually ridiculous.

Rose's voice snapped me out of my head and back into reality. "I'm going to kill her," Rose joked, only half serious.

"They're not that bad..." I told her, trying hard not to laugh.

"Shut up," Rose playfully punched my shoulder, and shook her head, "besides, you don't have to wear them."

"Sorry, it's just they're so... sorry, nevermind." This time I couldn't keep myself from laughing, but stop when I saw the "evils" she was shooting me. Damn, those glasses are seriously effective at making her point.

Rose glanced at herself in the mirror. "I look like Harry Potter."

"A little bit," I agreed,"but Harry's pretty badass."

Rose smirked. "Pretty badass, huh?"

I nod, looking her in the eye. "Plus Roe, if anyone says anything, you know I'll bloody well beat 'em up," I say half-joke, stepping back into what I hoped was an intimidating fighting stance.

Rose rolled her eyes. "Thanks Nat." She started to put her hair up into an elastic.

"Leave it down," I blurt, "it uh...I think it looks nicer that way."

"Ok," Rose says, taken aback. I've never said anything like that about her before.

Rose turned around and hugged me tightly. "Thanks."

I'm not sure what to say, so I blurt out the first thing that comes to mind. "Want some breakfast?" I ask dumbly,She must think I'm so stupid

Rose looked down at her watch. "Um ok, but we had better be quick. We've only got five minutes before we have to leave."

Racing down the stairs, we grabbed two bowls of cereals and dumped in some milk. After gulping it down, Rose and I rushed out the front door, my bag trailing from my hand. Rose expertly swung hers over one shoulder as we ran. We made it to the stop just as the last person was boarding. My bag got stuck in the closing doors, making me trip, almost taking Rose down with me. Everyone on the bus is staring at us now. A few people snicker and I hear Britany loudly whisper, "Get a room," and the whole bus joins in on the ridicule. Somehow we're the outcasts even though most people on this thing have the combined IQ of a garden pea. These idiots always manage to make everything a popularity contest.

"Told you they would notice," Rose mumbles sharply, her head kept low and eyes downcast as she quickly shuffling to a seat near the back and I slide in next to her.

"It doesn't matter what they think," I whisper back. Britany locks eye contact, puckering her lips at me along with some other lewd gestures. I braced myself for another normal, god-awful day, knowing Rose was doing the same thing. That is the reason why snow days and holidays were always such a relief. I'm always grateful for the escape, as is Rose.

"Now, that's not very ladylike," Harrison White, Britany's older brother, scolded his sister mockingly. "I don't think daddy would approve." He smirks at the sour look on his sister's face, tossing a nod in my direction. I grin. Harry is an ass to everyone and his sister is no exception. Rose just sighs and slides down further in the seat, staring blankly out the window at the slick black tarmac.

Before I can say anything, the bus goes flying over a massive bump, sending everyone roughly out of their seats as the driver speeds around a bend and pulls to a jarring stop in front of the school. There's a thud and I whip around to see Rose's head hit the ceiling hard. Her heavy glasses remain unaffected, even as her head lolls to the side. Holding her head, Rose stayed seated and didn't move for a long time, even when everyone else scattered off the bus. She looks dazed, but otherwise alright.

"You two getting off?" The driver snaps impatiently. Asshole, he probably did that on purpose.

"Just a minute mate," I call back.

I heard the driver mutter, "I 'aven't got all day."

The man grew louder. "Oi...I've places to be," he grumbled impatiently.

"Alright, just one minute-" I turned back around. "Er, Rose, we've really got to go," I say, urgently trying to rouse her.

"Ok," she squeaks, "give me a hand." Rose reached out a shaky hand, blindly groping for mine, eyes shut tight.

"Rose, do you think you can stand up?" I ask softly, trying to get a look at her head under her hand.

"Yeah, I think so. I hit my head pretty hard," Rose groaned through gritted teeth, clamping her hand back over her slightly swollen head.

We edged our way out of the bus, me supporting most of her weight as she stumbled almost drunkenly along.

Rose wanted to stop and sit down, but I wouldn't let her, continuing down the corridor straight to the nurse's office. The minute we walked through the door, the whole explanation came spilling out.

Nurse Smith nods. "There's a nasty on her eyebrow that needs looking after. And I'll have to check her head for any more injuries, but she won't be able to go to lessons today, that's for sure," the nurse states matter-of-factly. She turned back to Rose and started to tend turned to the gash over her swollen eye. "You'd best be off, Mr. Johnson," she said sternly, never once taking her eyes off of Rose.

I can't bare to leave her. "There must be something I can help with."

"Get her a sick bucket," nurse ordered, seeing Rose clamp a hand over her mouth.

I quickly grabbed a bucket from behind me and Rose snatched it out of my hands just as quickly, throwing up her entire breakfast right in front of me. And kept retching until there was nothing left but bile. I felt the food begin to rise in my own throat and covered my mouth, wanting to be sick too. Nurse Smith just shook her head and continued about her business.

Snapping on a pair of periwinkle exam gloves, nurse moved to take a better look at Rose's head. "She has a mild concussion along with the shallow cut above her eye, and other than a little nausea, nothing to worry about." Nurse Smith headed toward her desk. "I'll ring her mum." I nodded, still holding Rose's hand. She looked at me, leaning into my shoulder as she started to dose and I began to realise just how deeply my feelings for her went.

Rose

I went back to Nathan's house after school, because he knew I still needed space and right now was not the right time. I was angry at him for continually telling me everything was going to be ok, but I loved him for it too. I was angry at my mum for not having the decency to tell me right away, for letting it be her boss who told me the news, even if that had been an accident and for having the power to take me away from the only real friend I had ever had. But most of all, I was angry with myself for being so selfish. This promotion was a big deal and mum really deserved it.

Despite being able to finally admit it to myself, I couldn't even get myself to admit it to Nathan, much less my mother.

With exams coming at the end of the week, I could easily use studying as an excuse to avoid her, at least for a little while, but I would have to talk to her sometime but just not yet.

So he and I sat again on the lounge sofa, this time with a cup of cocoa in hand, planning what we would do for the Christmas holiday. Neither one of us wanted to waste even a minute of it.

We had been looking forward to this since the start of school in the fall, but now it seemed bitter sweet. Nathan kept on trying to reassure me and I appreciated his enthusiasm, but just couldn't allow myself to share his optimism. I had to accept the inevitable. I was moving in five months and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it.

Nathan

I hated to see her so worried, but nothing I said seemed to help. I couldn't help but miss how peaceful Rose had looked this morning, her pretty face free of worry. She just seemed so defeated now and I hated myself for not being able to do anything about.

"I feel so selfish," she said suddenly, not even turning to look at me, still staring longingly out the window.

I put a hand on her shoulder. When she looked at me my heart skipped a beat. "You should go talk to her," luckily the words came without any hint of what I was feeling.

Rose nodded, resigned and turned back to the window. "Ok," she sighed so quietly I almost couldn't hear her.

Rose

I left his house quickly. I didn't want Nathan to see the tears forming in my eyes. It was cold but I didn't care. I practically sprinted.

My mum opened the door before I even reached the front steps. Her eyes are red. "Oh Rose, I'm so sorry I didn't tell you sooner."

I wrapped my arms around her and bawled, the tears streamed quickly down my cheeks; I missed her so much.

She pulled back gently and looked at me for a long moment. "Oh darling, don't cry," she said softly, leading me inside.

. . .

That night, my mum and I talked for a long time and I told her she should take the offer. She nodded and attempted a smile. "Ok sweetheart. Why don't you go get some rest."

"That'd probably be a good idea," I admitted,yawning as I began my ascent up the stairs.

As I lay down on my bed, I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

Nathan

I drifted through the darkness, all the house's echoes and shadows slip away. The blackness lifts and Rose materialises beside me, a smile spreading widely across her face. I feel myself start to melt. Then suddenly I'm kissing her like there's not enough air in the room and she's the only thing that can keep me alive. Like I've never kissed anyone before.

. . .

When my alarm trilled the next morning, I rolled over, my heart sinking slightly when I found the spot next to me empty, remembering that Rose wasn't there.

I got ready quickly, hoping to get to her house before she left for the bus. I couldn't really explain it, but I just needed to be near her.

Standing outside Rose's door, I took a breath before raising my hand to knock. I waited. Nothing. I tried again. Still, no answer. My heart sank. I had missed her.

Rose

I waited patiently for Nathan at the bus stop, wondering what could possibly be taking him so long. I didn't want another incident like yesterday to happen, but I also didn't want him to miss the bus. He had been fine the last time I'd seen him, but I doubted he was skipping. That just wasn't Nathan. And besides "every hour of learning is important" apparently, at least according to Mrs. Anderson.We had all been warned severely against skiving off, not that I ever would anyway, unlike Britany and her minions.

A few minutes passed and I was starting to get really worried. Nathan had never missed the bus before. What could be keeping him?

Just then, the bus came blazing around the corner. I looked behind me as the doors sprang open. Nothing. Sighing, I got on anyway, making my way to our usual spot in the back. A handful kids from the first stop were already there, but none of them seemed to take any notice of my presence. Most looked bored, some had fallen asleep, and all of them ignored me. I had never been so happy to be invisible.

A minute or so later, we are joined by four other kids from my stop. The doors squeak shut and I start to lose hope in Nathan ever showing up.

"Wait!" a voice exclaims and Nathan came rushing down the aisle, sliding into the seat next to me. I didn't even care this time that people were staring.

Nathan

Rose looked relieved, a smile breaking across her face when she saw me. She had been worried. Really worried. I smiled back, the feelings from my dream returning in a rush. In that moment, I wanted to kiss her so bad, it was almost unbearable.

"Nathan?" I can hear the concern in her voice. "Nathan!"

I realise I had been staring at her for far too long.

"In your own world today then?" Rose asked, knocking playfully on my forehead. "Perhaps I should just ring back later?"

"Oh yeah..." I laugh inconveniently.

Rose doesn't let up. "No seriously, what's wrong?"

"Nothing... just tired," I yawn, hoping she won't catch me in a lie. Anyway, it was completely a lie.

"Ok, so let's have it," Rose exclaimed in a voice that told me she wasn't asking. I tried to look away, but her gaze held mine in a death grip. There was no changing the subject.

"Christ Rose, I just overslept, ok? That's why I was late."

She started to speak, but is cut off as the bus stopped abruptly at the school's front gate, sending Rose flying up and out of the seat. Her arms shot out in front as she tried to soften the impact. Somehow, everyone on the bus is staring, eating it up like an episode of EastEnders.

Rose

I could feel my face turning red. He is so infuriating. Why did he have lie to me like that? "You know what Nathan, you want to keep your secrets, then you can bloody well keep them, but don't expect me to stick around," I spat as I stormed off the bus. I heard him start to get up and whipped around. "And don't follow me." Everyone was staring again; I could feel their eyes moving from me, to Nathan, then back to each other, but I didn't care.

Nathan

Wait I wanted to say, but the words died in my throat, and I watched frozen as Rose passed the driver, probably muttering a few choice words, before running out the doors.

"Playing hard to get I see Johnson," Harry chuckled, winking at me.

"Piss off," I yell as I stalk off the bus, angry with everything.

Rose was gone, but I knew where she had gone to her first lesson. All I know is that I have to talk to her. I have to make this right. I just had to tell her the truth.

Rose hates liars. Even more than she hates moving. That was why she was so furious with her mother. And I hate myself for making her think I don't trust her.

I waited for a long while for her lesson to finish, hiding occasionally in the male lavatories to stay out of sight from the passing teachers, sure to be suspicious of why I was out of lesson. When she eventually did emerge, Rose walked right past me.

"I don't want to talk," Rose snapped, pushing past me.

"Please we need to talk about this," I plead, sounding desperate, but I don't care. She starts to walk faster and I panic, blocking her way.

"Move," Rose hissed.

I don't budge. "No, not until you talk to me."

"Move," Rose hissed again, trying to push me out the way but failing.

"Please talk to me. I can't stand you being mad at me, ok?"

"No," Rose shoves me again with more force this time. "The answer is no!"

My feelings overtake me and before I can fully realise what I'm doing, I'm kissing her.

I'm kissing her like I did in my dream. Like there's not enough air in the room and she's the only thing that can keep me alive. Like I've never kissed anyone before.

As we break apart, I see Rose cast her gaze to the floor. "This isn't how it's supposed to be." She doesn't sound angry anymore, she sounds helpless, pleading. She sounds desperate.

Like I may have just made a huge mistake and before I can say anything to try to make it right, Rose is running faster down the hall than I have ever seen her run before. And then she's gone.

Rose

I don't stop running till I reach the female lavatories, and even still that's not enough.

Did that just happen? Maybe it was a dream, I think half-heartedly, but I know it wasn't. I can still feel a tingling on my lips and my breath still comes short and shallow, certainly from more than just my frantic run down the hall. Yes that did just happen. He kissed me. My best friend kissed me.

He's Nathan. He's not meant to kiss me or be interested in me romantically. God, what is happening to my life? I sigh.

Yet some part of me swells, suddenly set free. It rejoices in what just happened. And for some reason, this frightened me.