Search for your live mate, don't search for your soul mate,
Myths about soul mates and live mates and truth.
You’re looking for a soulmate? Well, you’ve got it wrong!
Don’t look for a soulmate but look for a livemate.
You are setting yourself for disappointment because you have made it a priority to find a soulmate in order to have a positive relationship with someone who may be your mirror, since a soulmate is not intended to last. A life-mate, however, is intended to last. So which one are you going to prefer?
The majority of people assume that when they find their soulmate, they will:
Be happy to be fully self-confident and be accepted as they are;
Feel unworthy of existence;
There's a meaning to life.
Do you, too, believe that? Ok, three years ago, that was me. I realized the risks of thinking this way, after meeting my soulmate and having this wonderful bond, and then separation.
Here are 3 soulmate myths and 3 truths about a lifemate.
Myth of Soulmate #1: You're going to feel whole
You assume you will find a sort of redemption when you meet your soul mate. All the feelings of emptiness are going to vanish.
You know it's temporary.
While the various chemicals released in your brain dissipate (the perfect phase) after the reunion with your soulmate, the real work of seeing your own soul and cleansing will start. It's so painful. Really!
Myth #2 from Soulmate: Everything would be fine
In the beginning, when you find a mirror for your soul, all is perfect. Your reflection is seen... on the surface. The Ego Reflection.
And then, even the imperfections of your own soul can be revealed.
You will project on your partner all your imperfections after the ideal process without understanding they are yours. Since your partner will trigger this, any single trauma or childhood problem will come to the surface.
You're a codependent? You're a narcissist? You are confident? You will still attract the opposite of you, even though you believe you have attracted someone close to you at the moment.
Myth #3 of Soulmate: You will get unconditional love and acceptance
You are waiting for the unconditional love that every child from birth to age two should get. It is an illusion, however. Unconditional love doesn't exist as an adult.
Others 'love and acceptance are conditional. Only self-love and appreciation of oneself is unconditional. You will find someone who will not condemn you when you are able to attain the perfection of unconditional self-love and acceptance. And it's not really going to matter. And you're not going to deny or self-abandon.
Livemate truth #1: Above all, your mate is a friend.
A livemate is a person you share more than just a physical attraction with. It's beyond the vanity of a soulmate's appreciation.
You express curiosity and enthusiasm when you are with your friends when they speak about their day. You often use irony or affirm their thoughts and perceptions as well. With amusement and joy, you talk to them.
Friends are individuals you admire, and you see them as your equals. And you don't take it personally and you don't condemn or blame them for that, even though they have different preferences and show an opinion different from yours.
Together with a good friend, you never feel lonely and a life mate is a very good friend.
Livemate truth #2: Basic principles and priorities are in line with you.
A livemate is someone who is a part of your daily life and becomes your family. That's why a relationship is developed beyond physical attraction and deep emotional bond with a livemate.
You with a livemate:
Have coherent opinions on the role of work in one's life;
Have comparable philosophies regarding work and family life balance;
Share comparable values as lovers and partners in your roles;
Have similar values in your life regarding the significance and sense of money;
"Have equal "autonomy" and "freedom" ideals.
In short, universal principles and priorities are in synchrony with you. Are your beliefs known to you? Do you know your objectives? Perhaps it's time to examine them before your lifemate appears.
Livemate truth #3: You support the aspirations of one another
You see the bigger picture with a livemate, since it requires building a life together. You exist outside your own ego recognition, and with your livemate, you can comfortably project yourself for the long term. What's important to you, then? For your partner, what's important? You appreciate each other's dreams and encourage each other.
You are not in the way of the ambitions of each other, but rather make the dreams and expectations of their lives come true, even though they clash with yours. Without bitterness, you figure it out. You respect the aspirations of another life and create a common purpose.
So would you tell your partner the dreams of your life? And are you acquainted with yours?