Scary brush with a mad elephant

Driving in Krueger National Game Reserve when I lived several years in South Africa back in 1983-84, we were enjoying watching a herd of elephants crossing our gravel road. After about 35 elephants there was a gap in the parade enough that three cars in front of us dashed off to drive on their merry way, however the “gentleman” directly in front of us decided to stop and block the point they were crossing. How anybody in their right mind could think this was a good idea is simply beyond my comprehension and just what he/she was looking at soon became frighteningly obvious.

Unfortunately the alpha male and largest elephant I’ve ever seen was yet to cross the road to keep up with his family, he quickly got rather angry and charged the car blocking him from crossing. Well of course the offending driver/car quickly raced off to safety, leaving a furious huge elephant racing onto the road charging the first thing in his path leaving him with only my car to stomp on. He turned as if to say YOU! And charged for us as fast as the large fella could run, which I understand is about 25 mph.

I threw it in reverse and drove at least a kilometer as fast as my company car would go backwards, and driving on the right (wrong) hand side of the car didn’t make it any easier. I hadn’t exactly had a great deal of experience driving fast in reverse on the left side of the road and on the wrong side of the car, well to me and what I’m used to as an American. And by the way the hardest part of switching to driving on the opposite side of the vehicle is entering the vehicle. It took me three months to stop walking up and getting into the left side of the car like I was used to, then realizing I had to get out and walk around the car. Yankees get a lot of teasing for this over there.

I’m frantically driving in reverse to outrun the huge angry elephant thinking this could be how it all end’s for me while my best friends wife and three sons who were riding with me were screaming something, no idea what, and I think the boys were speaking at warp speed in Afrikaans, a language I’d not mastered yet.

Racing away from the huge and rather mad elephant seemed like an eternity though wasn’t likely much more than two or three minutes of terror and yet seemed like an eternity at the time. Finally after Mr big and furious elephant decided he’d taught me a lesson (and mercifully the car was faster than he was in reverse, me not the angry elephant), he slowly turned away to rejoin his herd and harem while I checked on my passengers and checked my underwear.

When we arrived in our safari lodge/hotel complex it was completely closed in for safety with a 20’ concrete wall topped with razor wire to keep the lions out. Just as you enter the complex the road splits and directly in front of you sits a red Ford F-150 pickup that was smashed so badly that not a bit of it was higher than three feet off the ground! Right next to it was a large sign that read; “Don’t think an elephant can kill you? Well neither did this bloke”. Gulp.

Needless to say after getting my luggage into my basha (Swahili for cabin), I had only one destination in mind; the pub! I must have enjoyed myself at the bar as my rather clear images and intense memory of my near death elephant experience, but don’t remember a thing from after going into the bar.

My passengers will all four confirm the accuracy of this recall of the event, with a bit of recollection trepidation I would presume. I’ll send them a link on FB, they mostly live in Costa Rica now with the hubby still helping patients as a chiropractor in a town there.

My wife is thrilled with the idea that somebody else besides her and our daughter can hear my stories and experiences from my younger years. She’s likely tired of hearing me tell friends and occasional strangers about my brush with a mad elephant.