Leaving Home;

I wanted to start this by writing about something other than Covid-19. Start with something to ignite my story, let it implode with purpose, unburdened and free.

But how could I? Covid's destroyed my year, just like it has destroyed countless others. When I finished secondary school in March (the Irish equivalent of high school) I thought we’d all be free by Halloween. It’s fair to say now that I was very wrong.

Just like that, my hopes of attending college this year were scattered like dust in the wind, a wind that's wound its way into billions of our lives, overturning our homes, our families and our very existence.

I was forced to come to a decision. Enrol in college, pay for accommodation I likely wouldn't be allowed to stay in, chance the terrible WI-FI I have with classes on zoom or simply not go. In case you couldn't guess I chose the later.

The days passed. Slowly.

So I wrote.

I wrote music. I formed a band pre-covid, called 'Polxroid' and lockdown let me write and play more music than I could dream.

I wrote stories. After a rocky period with my freelancing career, I found Vocal and haven't looked back since. Impossibly, I somehow surpassed 1600 reads recently, beating my '500 reads in a month' goal and I experienced pride for the first time in months thanks to Vocal - pride in myself and in my stories.

But my soul has longed for more.

I'm undoubtedly an introvert, enjoying reading, writing and staying at a home a lot more than going out. Lockdown was something of a blessing for me at the start. Although I've never had anxiety I've often distanced myself from social situations and interactions.

I knew if I wanted to get the most out of my life, something had to change.

I'm 17 years old. I'm saving up for a car, for college and now, my USA summer camp fees. It was late September I made the decision to become a camp counselor. A year ago, you couldn't have paid me to even sign up in the first place.

So why now? What changed?

Me.

I did. Lockdown has given me the time to explore my passions and myself in more detail than most would usually get in ten years. And it's taught me more than I could've ever dreamed.

There's more to life than standing still. There's more to life than playing it safe. I won't be held back by my fears anymore, I will be inspired. Most importantly, my fears will not define me. My passions will not hold me back.

I will move halfway around the world next summer, because I made that decision. Because I deserve to live my life to the full. And, no doubt, I will be as terrified as I am now.

I will be alone, thousands of miles from home, with nothing but the clothes on my back. But I can do it. If there's one thing Covid has taught me is that comfort is subjective; every environment is adaptable.

I will face obstacles I never would've braved. I will leave the safety of my family behind, to forge new relationships, to work abroad with strangers and to grow as an individual. I will learn and move forward whilst remembering who I am, who made me and where I come from.

Most importantly I will live.

Like this? Wanna read more? Just click the little picture of me below for tons of content just like this. Feel free to leave a like or even a tip. Merry Christmas! - Ciarán