Escape

“See you guys next time.” I yelled to my friends as I got my coat and walked out of the bar. The cold night air hit me hard and sobered me up immediately. So much for a good time. I grunted and pulled my collar up higher, letting my reality sink back in. As I walked home, I tried envisioning what would happen this time when I walked through the door. It could never be a “Hi, honey how was your day?” or a “So glad you’re home.” I picked up the pace, maybe he’s still out and I can get home before him. Tonight is cardio it normally takes him longer. With hope in sight and the house in front of me, I open the door. Peeking inside, I see Eugene standing there...arms crossed...waiting.

“Where the hell were you last night?!” Eugene asked. I swallowed hard, why were we still on this topic. I had told him this morning, would he believe me if I told him the same thing again? I have nothing to lie about but is he going to assume I am to cover something up. I looked down at his hand already in the shape of a fist and I braced myself not knowing how he would react.

“The job requires us to stay late, we had to finish pouring some concrete” I looked him in the eyes.

He stepped closer to me, pushing me against the wall.

“If I were to check with co-workers or your boss...” he slammed his fist into the wall next to me “...and you’re unaccounted for, there will be hell to pay.”

“Eugene...I swear I was at work.” I sighed “You can talk to anyone you want.”

“I just might.” He removed his hand, not realizing he put a hole in the wall. “Shit!” I could see him starting to get upset again.

“Don’t worry,” I said quickly. “There’s plaster in the closet, I’ll fix the hole. Why don’t you head to bed. It’s late and you look tired.” With that he went off to bed. I walked over to the closet and took out the plaster. Grabbed the rest of my tools and started to patch the hole up. I couldn’t help but think about how Eugene used to be with me. If he came home before me he would be waiting on the couch, with a blanket over him maybe a bag of chips. The tv would be on, the screen showing the movie he has picked out. His face would light up and he would motion for me to come under the blanket with him. We’d cuddle on up and watch the movie together. Sharing our thoughts and laughing at all the wrong moments. He was always so nice, he’d make sure dinner was done when I would come home. We would always talk about our day. It was nice light hearted fun. I looked forward to coming home and seeing him. Now, now I’m afraid to walk in the door. One thing's for sure, something has to change soon. Either he stops acting like this...or I have to find a way to calm him now.

I woke up at three the next morning like I always do. I headed to the shower, got dressed, and was about to pack lunch when I felt my phone go off.

No work today, too much rain. It was from my boss. Well looks like I have a free day. I started to put the stuff away that I pulled out to pack lunch. Then I remembered the fight Eugene and I had last night. I decided I would make us breakfast, sort of an apology for what had happened. I grabbed the eggs and milk out of the fridge. Then took the cinnamon and nutmeg from the cabinet. Before dunking the bread into the egg mixture I set up a pot of coffee, making sure to grab the dark roast; it’s his favorite. I turned on the pan and threw an unhealthy amount of butter into it. The smell of cinnamon wafted throughout the house. When starting to flip the third one, I felt a pair of hands slide around my waist.

“Morning.” Eugene planted a kiss on my cheek.

“Good morning, hope you’re hungry.” I flipped the french toast using just the pan and landed it perfectly. I turned to ask him if he caught that but he was already gone. Okay then. I went back to cooking. It’s nice that we both have early schedules, cause there’s no fear of waking each other up before they really planned to. God, what if he didn’t wake up until 6. I would probably be dead by now having my alarm go off at three every morning.

We ate in silence.

“What are your plans today?” Eugene asked mid bite.

“I’m not sure really. With the rain I may just relax at the house.”

“Ah good. The bathroom is gettin messy. You can clean it up today cause you’re off.”

I nodded.

After breakfast Eugene went off to work. I decided to do the dishes and then head straight to the bathroom to clean. I wiped around the sink, cleaned the tub and toilet, and pulled one of the air fresheners out of the cabinet to make the room smell nice. I also decided to vacuum the living area and straighten up the rest of the house. I’d say it was about 2 o’clock when I finished everything. I didn’t really know what else to do, and I didn’t want to head out in fear of Eugene getting mad that I went somewhere without him. So I decided to watch TV until he came home.

Around three o’clock Eugene came home.

“How was your day?” I asked

“Horrible,” he grunted “I need some relief.” He glanced at me and started to rub my leg.

I had looked down at the floor, he knows I’m not ready for that.

“Okay fine,” He stood up. “let’s go have a few drinks.” He pulled me off the couch and we went out the door, starting to walk towards the bar.

We sat down at the counter where my good friend Sam bartends. He came over and I introduced him to Eugene. We started talking about how his day was and how he’s had some weird customers for it only being about four in the afternoon. I guess Eugene didn’t like how friendly we were, because after a while of talking he blurted out.

“You know...Dallas won’t give it up. He’s always teasing and god knows I’m trying to get some of that ass.” My face got bright red and Eugene pulled me in for a big sloppy kiss on the mouth. Sam gave an awkward chuckle and excused himself to go help other customers.

“I’m going home.” I pulled a ten out of my pocket and left it on the counter and walked out. The whole walk home I couldn’t shake the feeling of embarrassment and shame. I opened the door, kicked my shoes off, walked into the bedroom, stripped and went to sleep. I don’t know how long I was out but I awoke to Eugene sitting on top of me, also naked, rubbing my back. I let out slight moans as his hands moved over my body.

“I’m sorry for what I said at the bar. I just wanted him to understand that you belong to me.” My body softened under his touch and he knew that I accepted his apology. “You think that feels nice huh?” He laughed. The next thing I knew I felt him pushing into me. Before I had the chance to tell him to stop he was all the way in. My body clinched in shock, but damn it felt good. After realizing I wasn’t going to fight him. Eugene started to move his hips, getting faster with each thrust. Eventually he finished, cuddled up next to me and went to sleep.

The next morning I woke up to another message from my boss saying there was no work. However instead of making breakfast, I waited for Eugene to wake up; I wanted to talk about what happened last night.

“Morning.” he kissed me on the cheek.

“Morning.” I was silent for a little.

“Eugene?” He looked over at me. “I want to talk about what happened last night.”

He laughed. “It was a great time wasn’t it? God you felt amazing.”

“That’s not what I mean. You know I wasn’t ready.”

“But you let me.”

“I know, but earlier you dropped it cause you knew I wasn’t ready. We had talked about that. You kinda forced…”

“I didn’t force anything! You could have told me no.”

“You were already inside me. What was I supposed to do?”

“So I “forced myself” on you because you were too pussy to tell me to get off?!” I sighed, he continued “For fuck’s sake, you’re trying to tell me I basically raped you.”

“Not exactly, just that you..”

He pushed me into that ground hard, knocking the air out of me. “I did not rape you!” Before I could say anything, his alarm went off. “Shit I’m going to be late, it’s all your fault. We’ll talk when I get home.” With that he got his stuff and rushed out the door. I laid on the ground, trying to wrap my head around what just happened. Of course I wasn’t trying to accuse him of rape, I just wanted him to know how I felt and maybe get an apology. Instead I got thrown to the ground! I need to get out of here, but I have nowhere to go. I decided I would just wait around the house until the bar opened, making sure I was gone before Eugene came back.

I sat on my couch practically brain dead about what happened a few hours prior. At one thirty I got myself together and walked down to the bar. The feelings of sadness, anger, and fear swam around in my mind. The conversation was not supposed to go like that. Why would he hurt me when all I wanted to do was talk about how I’m feeling? Partners aren’t supposed to hurt each other, but bring one another up. I opened the door to the bar and sat at my usual spot on the counter, Sam came over. took my order, and tried to converse with me. But I just wasn’t in the mood, I came here to drink until I became numb. Numb to the point where I couldn’t picture Eugene’s stupid face. Numb to where the events that he caused me harm all became lost in a sea of booze. I just wanted to forget.

“Hey man, why are you so down? Don’t even tell me you’re fine.” Sam said “I can tell something’s up because you’ve done nothing but down drinks, normally you at least talk to me!”

I couldn’t tell him, not before I can make sense and rationalize why Eugene did that, Sam would just think he's abusive but he's not...right? I looked down into my glass, now realizing it completely empty. I handed the glass to Sam and shook my head yes, answering the silent question of if I wanted another one. I needed to talk to someone, no one knows what’s been happening. Besides who could I trust more than Sam? He’s not just some bartender, I consider him to be one of my closest friends. He’s opened up to me before about personal issues and such so why shouldn’t I. That’s what friends do right?

Sam came back with another rum and coke, I took a sip. He’s definitely going easy on the rum now. “You can’t tell a soul” I lowered my voice, Sam nodded in response. “And I don’t want you to try and help, like I don’t need advice or anything.” Another nod, I took a gulp of my drink. “Eugene...he uh” I paused trying to find the right words, I don’t want to make him sound like a bad guy. “He kinda got mad earlier, we had, uh, a little fight I suppose.” Another pause. The memory I tried so hard to drown now came flooding back in full detail. “He um he kinda threw me to the ground earlier.”

Sam’s eyes widened-a look of sorrow mixed with a hint of fear appeared on his face. He laid his hand down on mine. “I’m so sorry. Are you alright? You know I’m here for you, if you need to talk if you need a place to...”

The door to the bar swung open. “Dallas!” Eugene screamed “where the fuck are you!” He looked around and found where I was, everyone was frozen, no one dared to make a move. That’s when I realised Sam still had his hand on top of mine. Shit, shit, shit. This looks bad, very bad. I quickly pulled my hand away but it was too late. Eugene had already saw. He was pissed and came rushing right over to me. I stood up trying to explain that it wasn’t what it seemed, but the words wouldn’t come out. Then bam! He hit me. Like full on punched me in the face, knocking me to the ground. My head was spinning, I couldn’t see straight. I sat up and saw that Eugene had Sam by the collar of his shirt, practically pulling him over the counter. Damn it, what am I gonna do?! The other guys in the bar started getting rowdy, they love this kinda action. It’s probably the most excitement they get. I saw Eugene’s arm pull back, his hand in a fist. Sam is trying to block his face, everything is in slow motion. I have to do something.

Without thinking I spring onto my feet, adrenaline rushing through my body, I pried Eugene’s hand away from Sam’s shirt and shoved him back away from the counter. He looked as shocked as I felt, because I had never stood up to him before.

“Don’t touch him!” I stared Eugene down. “You have no right to be coming in here and randomly laying your hands on people!”

“I have every right. That bitch was touching what was mine. I’m not about to stand here and let that slide without any consequences!” Eugene rushed back over and tried knocking me out of the way to get back to Sam. I stumbled a little because of all the alcohol in my system, but stood fairly tall. “Move, Dallas! I have to show him you can’t just do what you want to other people who are taken!” Eugene hissed.

“No one’s taken Eugene...not anymore. I’m sorry but it’s over.” I looked to the ground-it pained me to call it off, Eugene is a really nice guy at heart. He’s the man I fell in love with. He’s probably just in a funk and doesn’t realize the pain he’s causing. But how much longer would this continue when would he go back to the loving man he was. However I know it’s not healthy to date someone who goes after your friends, let alone you.

“You, you can’t break up with me! I’ll kill you! It’s me or nothing babe.” Eugene’s hands came crashing down on my wrist, his grasp was so tight making the feeling of pins and needles go up my arm. He started walking towards the door, pulling me along with him. I tried to pull his hand away. Tried to dig my feet into the ground. Sadly, being intoxicated makes you very easy to control.

I didn’t have the strength to fight back. I turned my head to look at Sam, he looked frightened but not because of what Eugene did to him. He looked frightened because I was being dragged across the floor. I wanted to tell him I was sorry. Sorry for what I had brought him into. I heard him yelling, but couldn’t make out what it was he was saying. Eugene opened the door and pushing me through taking me back to our “home”.