Humans logo

Curious About Becoming a Sugar Baby?

A Few Basics to Know

By Liliana LanajPublished 7 years ago 6 min read
Like

Ever been curious about being a sugar baby? Some might have not even heard of the term. A sugar baby is the counter part to a sugar daddy/sugar mamma. That's right men, can be sugar babies too.

I've always heard of the term sugar daddy but it was always a far away fantasy term. Like you joke with your friends and say I need a sugar daddy. No one actually means it. It's just a fantasy like winning the lotto. One day I saw a documentary on sugar babies and sugar daddies with different arrangements. That was my first glimpse into that lifestyle but of course, back then I quickly decided it wasn't for me.

Yet some days when I felt desperate I'd fill out a profile half way on a sugar website, stare at the screen and hit cancel. There was no way I could be as confident and elegant as those sugar babies! They knew what they wanted and how to get it. No way I could be a gold digger! Besides what kind of weird men would I encounter? I can't rely on a man for money my whole life. I'm definitely not skinny enough or hot enough for this.

Common things that run through your mind when you're on the edge of hitting confirm and cancel. So here are things you need to know if you ever thought about exploring the idea of being a sugar baby.

1. You are not a gold digger.

Although the arrangement/relationship is based on money you don't have to feel like a gold digger. These men/women already know what they're signing up for. They want to spoil you and give you money. You're not tricking them into it. You don't have to rely solemnly on your sugar daddy for financial stability.

One misconception is that sugar babies rely on their sugar daddies for everything. Like housing, food, education and if the arrangement were to break you'd be out on the street. Absolutely not, that does not have to be you. You can work and have your own life separate to being a sugar baby.

2. Know what you want.

Being a sugar baby isn't entirely like being in a relationship and just seeing how it goes, no. You have to come to the table knowing what kind of arrangement you want. You never have to do something your not comfortable with.

A popular stereotype of a sugar baby/sugar daddy relationship is rich old men with young hot girls who are experts at makeup and walking in 6-inch heels. Wearing tight fitted dresses and most likely putting out. If that is not your style, you don't have to try to be someone you're not. You don't have to do anything you don't want to, either. There are a lot of other arrangements where you can just be yourself. That is a common misconception and part of the reason why I kept hitting cancel.

Sugar daddies know what they want and that isn't always a perfect skinny girl or thick girl with a flat stomach. Sometimes it's more about personality than body. Be confident in your own skin even if you are on the heavy side or maybe don't have the perfect figure.

3. Set up arrangements.

An arrangement is the terms you set for the relationship between you and your potential sugar daddy. So you already decided what you want. Perhaps you want to have fun on the weekends. Watch movies, go to a fancy restaurant, have an engaging conversation.

Or perhaps you want expensive vacations out of the country or maybe only a sexual arrangement. Whatever the case may be for it to work, you must be open and honest on what you want and what you expect. How much money you want and how often.

Before the deal has been struck meet your potential sugar daddy in a public place. Maybe have a lunch or a dinner. Something simple and see how comfortable you are with this person before moving forward.

4. Watch for the frauds.

Like any other dating sites, there are frauds and scammers. It is important not to get too excited and give out your bank information just like that. You might get a message that sounds a little too good to be true like;

"I came across your profile and I think you're perfect! I'm a down to earth business man looking to spoil you! I travel for business so we can meet every other weekend and I'll give you a weekly allowance. Are you interested? Yes, then give me your bank information and I'll set you up on my payroll."

That is a red flag. A sugar daddy is as careful as a sugar baby. He would want to meet you first and iron out the details of the arrangement before deciding to spoil you and method of payment.

Being new to the sugar scene, I did my homework. Within a few days, I got fraud messages like these. I which I replied with, "I won't give you my banking information at this time." Which they replied, "Really, why not?"

After giving them my reasons like I haven't met you, we haven't discussed a price point or what we expect from each other, I don't know what you look like. They would never write back. These scammers assume that you're a dumb veteran sugar baby with lots of cash stored away in your bank account. Don't fall for it. I prefer cash transfer apps because you don't have to give your personal banking information.

There are also those who even though they are on a sugar daddy site they don't intend to bring the sugar. You can spot these when they have something like "Looking for bae" on their headline. Men that are looking for a romantic long-term marriage leading relationship and somehow think that they'll achieve that on this kind of site. There are also those who want the arrangement but not bring on the sugar.

5.Stay safe!

So you hit it off online with a potential sugar daddy. Everything seems perfect and you're getting ready to meet. Being a new sugar baby, you might not want to let everyone know that you decided to take a chance on this out-of-the-norm lifestyle. Especially to your family but safety is very important.

If your going to meet someone let a friend know where you are going. In my case, I let them know where I would be, for how long, and set up safety alert texts. Like when I arrived, the middle, when I left, and finally when I arrived back home.

If in your case you feel like you don't have anyone to do that with or trust anyone enough with the private details of your life. You can just say, hey if I'm not back by, or if you don't see me on this day then. But just have some plan. It will also ease your nerves a little bit.

Other than getting spoiled by your sugar daddy there are other rewards to this life style. Making a new friend and companion. Discovering a whole new world. Finding yourself, and discovering things about yourself that you didn't realize before. Maybe finding aspects of this relationship you can bring into a romantic relationship when the time comes. Having perspective on different things.

Although this is a flexible lifestyle, it still doesn't mean it is for everyone. You might want to try it but decided it most certainly isn't for you. And that's okay. Life is a journey.

how to
Like

About the Creator

Liliana Lanaj

Im a low key adventurist. I love to try new things which include food, new places, reading up on religion, culture, beauty and more. Iv been around the world but I have yet to see all of it. I'll try mostly every thing at least once.

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2024 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.