A Chance

I sat at the end of my bed staring at the little black notebook. This book did not belong to me, or at least it hadn’t started out that way. Once you’ve stolen something, I feel like it becomes your property, right? Not that I steal often, actually, this is the first time I have ever done anything like this. Anyway, that’s beside the point. I first saw this notebook earlier today while walking downtown. I had been looking for the apartment number I was supposed to be delivering to. Being a pizza delivery driver in downtown Chicago, you gotta be careful. I always steer clear of trouble, I know if I mind my own business then others will mind theirs. So why hadn’t I done that today?

I was looking for this apartment when I saw two men in pinstriped suits standing close together. They were engrossed in conversation and hadn’t noticed me. They sounded like they were in a shouting match. “Come on, Jerry! I don’t see no big deal here.”

“Yeah, you wouldn’t because you have a brain the size of a pea, don’t ya!”

“All’s I’m saying is that we could slip out a couple thousand and no one would be any wiser.”

“Ya know who wouldn’t be any wiser Tom? You! Are you trying to get me killed? Yeah, just slip out a couple thousand, no one will ever know! Goodness, I knew you were dumb but I didn’t think you were that dumb.”

Tom looked affronted and continued in his argument saying, “K, then a couple hundred. I just need some extra cash. Come on Jer.”

Jerry lifted the book between the two of them and said, “You ain’t gettin a dime outta this book, especially not to pay ya gamblin’ debts.”

It was at that moment that I realized what was going on. These two men were part of the mob and were doing a money drop. It was like a scene out of a movie, I couldn’t believe I was actually witnessing this. I quickly and quietly turn around, praying they hadn’t seen or heard me. I round the corner and instead of booking it back to my car which I knew is what I ought to have done, I stopped. That book probably held thousands of dollars. Probably just slipped between the pages or something. I needed money, I needed it bad. Ever since my dad had died about a year ago me and my mom had been living in a rundown shack apartment. She had picked up a night job pulling doubles at a 24-hour diner and I had gotten this job delivering pizza. I knew that mom couldn’t hold out much longer, being so overworked and still being crushed under the weight of losing dad. There might be enough money in that book to get us through for months, maybe even a year. Maybe even enough to move to a better apartment across town . . . Maybe enough to leave town altogether . . . No, I couldn’t let myself dream that far. I needed to stay realistic. The fact was that I needed that money.

Before I knew what I was doing I had set down the pizza box and started quietly walking back to the corner. I saw that the two men were no longer there and leaning against an apartment building sat the notebook. I would never notice it if I had just been passing by. I knew I had to be quick, someone would be walking by any second to pick it up. I start a brisk walk toward it, looking up at the building, pretending to be looking for apartment numbers. Once I reach the notebook I act as if I tripped and bent down pretending to tie my sneaker. After a final cursory glance to make sure no one was around, I scooped up the book and quickly stuffed it under my shirt. I stood up and began to walk in the direction I had come. I had almost made it around the corner when I heard a deep voice call out, “Hey!”

I glance back and see a man standing at the end of the block holding a gun! My heart began to race. I began running as fast as my tiny 5’3” frame would carry me. I rounded a second corner and saw my car where I had left it. I quickly jump into the car, grateful I hadn’t locked it for once in my life, and immediately put the gas to the floor. Going as fast as I could. As I passed the corner where I had just been, I saw the man running towards me. I willed my car to go even faster and turned on the next street, praying that the man hadn’t seen my plates. Goodness, this was the stupidest thing I had ever done. What was I thinking? I could’ve just been killed.

That brings me to the present, with me sitting in my dingy apartment, wondering what on earth I was supposed to do with this now obviously worthless book. I had gone through every single page and found nothing but paper. Worthless, horrible paper. I had angered the mafia for no reason. Why did they even want this book? Maybe there’s drugs soaked into the paper, maybe it wasn’t a cash drop off, but a good’s drop? I’m pretty sure I’ve seen that in a movie where they soak something in the liquefied drug to make it easier to hide. Oh goodness, I just stole drugs, what kind of sick person was I?

I felt like I was going to throw up for how much trouble I had gotten into and all for nothing. I pick up the book intending to throw it against the wall, I have it arched over my head about to release it when I notice the pages. Why are the pages so thick? I mean it was a nice quality book with a beautiful black leather cover, but even a quality notebook doesn’t have paper that thick. I pull it closer to my face to better inspect it and I am now certain that these pages are abnormal. Not so thick that it’s totally obvious, (I had proved that in the last thirty minutes while I had been staring at it) but they were definitely unusual. I began to fiddle with the corner of a page. To my surprise, it started to peel away! With my heart racing I tore it back the rest of the way and stared in amazement at the cash sitting there.

It was a couple hundred dollars just on this one page! I quickly began tearing through the rest of the book, money spilling out with every page. Once all was said and done, I had counted out 20,000 dollars. I had never seen so much money at one time in my life. I was so excited I thought my heart would burst from how fast it was pounding. I gathered it all in my hands and threw it in the air with a squeal!

It lands all over my bed and I flop down into it, relishing in the dirty green. I breathe in the wonderful griminess of it all. It wasn’t a fortune by any means, but it was a lot of money that I could make go a long way. I began to laugh uncontrollably at the ridiculousness of what I was doing, but I didn’t care how silly it looked, this was the answer to all my prayers.

It was at this moment of complete insanity that my mother walked in. I freeze mid-laugh and just stare at her. My mind begins to race, how am I going to explain this to her? She’d never approve, she’d call me crazy and make me return it all. I almost laugh again at the idea of trying to return 20,000 dollars of stolen money to a mob boss. I manage to keep myself composed though and instead say, “Hi mom.”

She doesn’t even play along, she goes straight for the kill. “Serenity Rose Clegg! What is all this money and where on this forsaken earth did you get it?” Her voice was filled with unspoken accusations.

“Um, would you believe me if I said it was a really good day for tips?”

She put her hands on her hips and looked at me with that guilt riddling expression only a mother can give, “No, I would not.”

“Mom, listen, it was just sitting there, I mean the real crime would have been to not take it!” My voice is pitched high as my words tumble out over my tongue.

“Serenity! Don’t you dare tell me that this is stolen!”

“Shhhh” I say rushing over to cup her mouth with my hand. “I don’t want the whole block knowing about it.”

Her eyes look down at my dirty hands covering her mouth and I quickly pull them away, as if her eyes had burned them. She takes a deep breath in, obviously trying to compose herself. When she speaks again her voice is eerily calm. “And where exactly did this stolen money come from?”

My face pales as I prepare to lay the truth on her. “Well, you see, there were these two guys . . . and they sort of just left it . . . on the side of the road. So, I grabbed it.” Her eyes look expectantly at me for further explanation. “Then I kinda sorta ran away from the other guy that was coming to pick it up.” I finish off in a hurry.

Her eyes alight with understanding. “You stole from a mobster?” Her voice is quiet and filled with so much fear it curdles my blood, sending a chill down my spine.

“Well, yeah, I guess.” Came my weak reply.

She nods, her calmness scaring me more than anything else. “How much?”

I’m taken aback by this response and it takes me a minute to figure out what she means. She continues to look expectantly at me, I fumble over my words but manage to say, “20,000.” She nods again. “Mom?” She looks up, “You’re scaring me.”

She gave me a sad smile and said, “I’m sorry, I know, you’re probably already terrified. We have to leave, now.”

“What?!” My voice is high, I don’t know what I had been expecting her to say but it wasn’t that. She began rifling through our drawers, pulling out clothes and shoving them into the duffel bag we kept under the bed. “Mom?” My voice came out as a whisper. She turned toward me, with understanding in her eyes.

“It’s time to leave sweetheart. I’ve been thinking about it for some time, but I kept waiting until we had some savings. I think 20,000 should be more than enough to get started. When we first moved to the city, it was because your father was in trouble, trouble like this. It was easier to get lost in the crowded city. I’ve been wanting out of this awful town since day one, but, surprisingly, it was the safest place for us. Not anymore though. It’s finally time to start over.”

She hands me the now packed duffel bag and picks up the discarded black notebook from the bed and stuffs the money back into its pages. I am in shock, but elated at the same time. I was getting out. We were leaving. I wouldn’t have to spend another day in this sin ridden town. I had only ever stayed to help my mom, I hadn’t known she’d wanted out too. This filthy stolen money had given me the chance I had been longing for since I was little, the chance to start over. I hug my mom. She hugs me. We look at each other and nod, then leave, lock the door, and don’t look back.