When the worst happens

Anna wasn’t pretty in the conventional sense but there was something about the warmth and depth of her green blue eyes, and the smile that lit up her face, that drew people to her. She had a kind and compassionate nature that meant people found her easy to open-up to. On any public transport, she would inevitably be engaged by those sitting next to her and end up hearing all their tales of woe as she had a talent for empathetic listening. This wasn’t entirely within her comfort zone as she was naturally quiet and preferred her own company or that of her small, tight knit circle of friends. There was a vulnerability about her, likely emphasised by her shy nature, that meant men tended to want to protect her. They saw her kindness as weakness and worried that she would be easily taken advantage of. Those who knew her well, understood that she was not in need of protection. She was strong-willed and stubborn and she was resolute in her drive to fight injustice. Give her a cause to fight for and she was unstoppable.

Today though, she wasn’t feeling very strong. She’d woken with a heavy weight on her chest and every part of her wanted to pull the duvet back over her head so she could hide from the world. Instead she dragged herself from the bed and stepped into a hot shower. She closed her eyes and let the water wash away the sense of dread that was filling her stomach. She had a challenge in front of her today and she wasn’t entirely sure she was up to it. A soft meow from the bathroom door reminded her of her responsibilities and she quickly exited the shower and dressed before heading to the kitchen to feed Mogs, her beautiful Bengal cat. “How about I stay here and laze on the couch and you can be me, Mogs? How would that be? I’m sure they’d never notice.” She smiled as Mogs purred and pressed her face into her leg.

Anna had worked for the victim support service for 9 years and had become accustomed to dealing with the distress of others but today was different. Today was the worst possible scenario that she could imagine. She arrived at the morgue and spotted her colleague lingering at the bottom of the steps smoking a cigarette. “Hey Joe,” she said, “How’s things?”

“Been better.” He said. She nodded solemnly to show she understood.

“Have the family arrived yet?” she asked. “Nope” came the curt reply. Joe was never the most talkative at the best of times but the current situation was clearly getting to him. “Okay, good. I was hoping for a chance to settle myself in before they arrive. I’m going for a pee.” He nodded and took a big drag on his cigarette. In the ladies, Anna splashed her face with cold water, leant against the basins and let her head drop forward. She could not shift the sick feeling in her stomach. She looked up and examined herself in the mirror. At least she looked the part, even if she didn’t feel it. Her soft brown curls framed her lightly made up face and she looked every bit the professional in her black tailored trouser suit. She took a deep breath and braced herself. Everyday she stood next to others in the worst moments of their lives. She held her head high and gave her strength to those who could barely hold it together, but the absorption of external suffering was wearing her down.

When she re-emerged in the lobby the family had just arrived and Joe was shaking hands with them. Mrs Webster looked like a broken woman. Her shoulders were slumped and she moved as though every step was a huge effort. Her eyes were red and puffy. Mr Webster was all business, back straight and jaw clenched. “I’m Anna Watt. I’m with victim services and I’m here to support you through this process. I’m completely independent to the investigation and am here to answer any questions you may have or just to listen. My services will be available to you for as long as you feel you need them.”

“Can we just get on with this please?” Mr Webster said in a gruff voice. “Of course,” said Anna.

“Follow me,” said Joe. He led them down a long, tiled corridor, into an old cage shaft elevator and then out into another long corridor with double doors at the end. On the way, he explained some of the circumstances behind the case, “The body was found yesterday afternoon, around 1500, in the basement of a disused property on the Greshop industrial estate. The discovery was made by police after they received an anonymous call in the morning.” As he talked, Anna noticed Mrs Webster begin to sway and she caught her before she slumped to the ground. She slowly lowered her to sit and asked Joe to get some water. “Are you sure you’re up to this Mrs Webster?”

“I can do it on my own, Dot,” Mr Webster said in a gentle voice, “there’s no need to put yourself through it.”

“No,” said Mrs Webster, with such ferocity that Mr Webster jumped. “She’s my little girl and I want to see her. Just give me a minute.” Once she’d regained her composure the solemn group continued through the door at the end of the corridor and revealed a cold room with metal surfaces. There was a gurney covered with a white sheet in the centre of the room and they all stood alongside it. Joe peeled back the sheet and Anna felt her blood run cold as recognition washed over her. Beneath the hollow eyes and bluish tinge to the skin, it was undeniable. The body beneath the sheet belonged to Anna.

Anna woke with a start! Her heart was pounding out of her chest and a thin layer of sweat covered her body. The nightmares were getting more frequent but the real nightmare was still to come and the thought of the day ahead weighed heavy on her.