Intrusive Thoughts of a Psychopath?
The beginnings of a killer?
Every morning, every day, the same.
Every morning, every day, the same old humdrum.
Wake up, coffee, shower, shave, brush teeth and floss.
Get ready, leave house.
Let those intrusive thoughts run wild as I make my way into my favourite cafe. I say favourite...closest to home is perhaps more like the truth.
Have you ever looked someone in the eyes and thought, as you take in the full exent of the emotionless expressionless way their eyes meet yours, that the world might not be such a bad place without them in it.
Without them standing there in front of you, mouth gaping open wide, the surly look of a teenager that has been told by their parents to clean their room.
Without them muttering just beneath their breath in response to your questions as you wait for them to take your order.
Your order which you are going to pay for at their crappy cafe. Your order of the dullest sandwich, most bitter coffee and driest cake you've ever had.
It may seem like a bit knee-jerk reaction to bad customer service to want to rid the world of their existence. To make a widow or widower of their better half, to make their parent's childless and orphans of their children.
But, still, for a fleeting moment, before you sit at a free table to the back of the poorly lit room.
Before you slurp that first slurp of bad coffee and think things can't get much worse.
Before you take the first bite of the overpriced tasteless sandwich.
You imagine pummelling their face into the floor and leaving a cranberry-hued mess of blood, skin, bones and flesh. Something a bit more interesting for the flies to feast on.
How dare they make your life and world and experience that little bit crapper. Just because they are fed up.
How dare they indeed.
Of course, you leave the cafe and leave a tip because you may have anger issues and definitely be on a spectrum of some kind, but you're not a complete monster.
Then, when you walk down the street, and have to avoid all the bloody people standing in your way. This is a pavement for walking, not standing and talking about this and that, that and this. You just missed a bus, but don't worry, some old fella with nothing better to do is about to chew your ears off about the blood shrinkflation or some such nonsense. You look at his neck, all wrinkly and leathered and wonder how many breaths he has in him. How easy it might be to strangle the life out of the old sod then he wouldn't have to worry about the size of Kit-Kats or the amount of crisps you get in a regular bag of Walker's. You for a second, zone out his mutterings as you imagine the sweet delerium as you feel his crumpled, dry skin in the palm of your hands and feel his weak lungs pushing air through his windpipe as it feebly tries to reach his facial exit hole.
Fortunately for Old Walter or Arthur or whatever the hell his name is...I snap out of it before I snap his neck.
After a stress-filled but drama-free bus ride to work, I spend the rest of my day helping people travel to their next life.
Not nearly as satisfying as it sounds, as they are already dead before I get my hands on them.
The smell of burning flesh, though, soothes me.
At the end of a hard day, a shot of whisky, steak and chips and bed.
Time to prepare myself for another day in this dull existence I've carved out for myself (when really I want to carve up someone).
*
Thanks for reading!
Author's Notes: This idea was begging to be written. So I obliged. Obviously a work of fiction. Anyway, hope you enjoyed it...may become a series in the future..
About the Creator
Paul Stewart
Scottish-Italian poet/writer from Glasgow.
Overflowing in English language torture and word abuse.
"Every man has a sane spot somewhere" R.L Stevenson
The Accidental Poet - Poetry Collection is now available!
https://paulspoeticprints.etsy.com
Reader insights
Outstanding
Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!
Top insights
Compelling and original writing
Creative use of language & vocab
Easy to read and follow
Well-structured & engaging content
Excellent storytelling
Original narrative & well developed characters
Eye opening
Niche topic & fresh perspectives
On-point and relevant
Writing reflected the title & theme
Keep reading
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Comments (31)
Please make it a series, Paul!! I was hooked from the beginning! Suspenseful and creepy, and I just knew he would lose control at some point, which made it all the more tantalizing at the end when he didn’t.
Outstanding writing.... I'm amazed!
Woah, this was a piece of work right here. You seriously did an incredible job with this character, pal! He's terrifying. That inner monologue was amazing and set the stage for something more with this dude. Awesome work and congrats on top story! Also, loved your author's note "fiction, obviously" lol!
Outstanding! Keep striving for greatness—congratulations!
This was so intense to read. I don't know if you've ever played Baldur's Gate 3, but this inner monologue was exactly what I'd imagine The Dark Urge thinks when their intrusive thoughts of murder start to kick up. Chilling but also, mildly relatable? We're all dark in some way. We just know not to act on it.
Dark and frighteningly relatable. Pretty much everybody I've ever talked to has "intrusive thoughts," I think the difference between a psychopath and a neurotypical person is that the neurotypical person is horrified, disgusted, and a bit angry at themselves for having such thoughts, they'll push those thoughts aside before they get to graphic. A psychopath enjoys them and entertains them, letting the intrusive thoughts in and taking them down the rabbit hole. Congratulations on Top Story! It's not easy to climb up the Vocal story ladder. Well done.
Congratulations on Top Story. Very engaging piece! I do wonder if it's a Psychopath or depression talking. Psychopath, I feel psychopaths blame others for these feelings.
Well written but god dam this was a little bit horror
Well, that was horrible and amusing at the same time. Psychopaths have to start somewhere, why not the crematorium. Good read. Have a great Christmas.
I remember seeing this title pop up in my notifications and making a note that I needed to check it out! Lo and behold it makes Top Story!! Great work Paul and congrats!! I feel like a psychopath admitting how relatable this is for me! 😅
I liked each and every well written line to this story. Especially this time of year you have to wonder. Congratulations Paul
Aaand there's the Top Story. Congratulations!
Loved this, Paul. It flows perfectly and creates a real sense of who the main character is. I think this would make a very good novel, you could go so many ways with this. Congrats on the well-deserved Top Story.
You have to write this book. I want to read it. It is savage!
There's going to be an awful lot of backstory if you continue this!
This was unhinged and I liked it!
cool
How nice is it to be naughty! You've done this one proud and congrats on the TS but on thing is bothering me...where did you park the lorry? + something similar I did back in the day.. https://vocal.media/poets/murde-r-junki-e
This was really fascinating to read. Congrats on top story!
You've created a really poignant tale about a character on the verge of losing it. Extremely beautifully done; I relished every word!
You've crafted such an expressive piece about a character who's ready to snap. Really well done; I thoroughly enjoyed every word!
This is wonderful, and horrible. Nicely done. Congrats on the TS
Very nicely twisted, Sir.
Yo, so… Intrusive thoughts are real and can be traumatic if you don’t have the tools (no pun intended) to deal with these ..I don’t pay these much heed anymore..they can manifest in all sorts of ways including thoughts of harming others, self harm etc. . More a product (I believe) of an OCD brain than a psychopath, so I read this as more psychological (but still written in a wry and uneasy tone) rather than slasher. Anyhow that is my two cents! 😊
Sir Paul! You didn't ask my permission before writing my autobiography. I see that you've made some tweaks here and there but trust me, I know it's me you're talking about. It's like looking in a mirror. I want a split of however much you make from this story. Me 70 and you 30 because you didn't get my permission. This is trespassing. Plagiarism. Or whatever that it's called. You get what I mean. If you don't gimme my share, you'll hear from my lawyer. Kbye 🍩🥐