Villainess Review: Dr. Joan Allenby (Columbo)

I love Columbo, I really love that show. I love so much about Columbo. I adore the howcatchem format, I'm enthused by how nearly every episode kicks off with the central killer's path to committing their murderous deed, I even love that each episode is basically at movie length: close to 90 minutes. One of the reasons why I'm a huge fan of the Peacock series, Poker Face, is because it's a modern day Columbo--from the format to the big name guest stars, to its central character.

Columbo lasted 10 seasons in a span of over four decades, and this is because Season Eight started nearly 11 years after Season Seven (the final season from the original run) ended. The last three seasons are considered the "modern era," which does fit, because these episodes aired during my lifetime. All of the show's antagonists have been quite interesting, especially the female ones, and without question, the best one from the modern era comes from the episode, "Sex and the Married Detective."

The episode centers on Dr. Joan Allenby, a famous sex therapist who was shown finishing one of her shows, while being watched by her love interest, David Kincaid. The couple is very much in love, as we see in the episode's opening, but sadly, all good things must come to an end. As Joan visited her office late one night, she saw a heartbreaking sight: David...in the arms of Joan's assistant, Cindy Galt. Scandalous. The next day sees Joan act nonchalant and unknowing of David's affair, but in actuality, the wheels were turning in Joan's head, and they turned to thoughts of revenge and murder.

Joan's murderous plot actually included a rather stunning disguise. High heels, a lavish dress, a wig, and a fedora, all in black, and we see her try on the disguise before packing it up and taping the outfit under a public bathroom sink. Joan later attends an important gathering in her usual attire, but takes the open opportunity to sneak into the bathroom and don her villainous disguise and leave the gathering under her alter-ego, which she named "Lisa." She later approached David, who is enraptured by Joan's look and demeanor, and the pair took their hot and heavy encounter back to that office. David is enjoying Joan's seduction and is expecting more.

However, Joan has another thing in mind:

Joan takes out her gun and shoots David to death, completing her murderous revenge, and afterwards, she changes out of the attire and returns to the gathering. In typical fashion, Columbo is on the case, and we see actual discussions about Joan's profession and topics, as well as her book, The Courtesan Complex, with Columbo mentioning that his wife has read it. The "lady in black" was mentioned, though Joan claimed never to have seen her. Joan was set on burning her disguise, but circumstances prevented her from doing so; though, she would put it on one more time and enter a bar to further throw suspicion off herself. That would usually work on others, but this is Columbo.

Columbo tents to notice the smallest of things, and in this case, it was a tag on Joan's blazer during their very first encounter. Sure enough, Columbo frantically looked for a similar tag all over the building's offices, and he managed to find it, leading to a confrontation between the ruffled detective and Joan, whose defiant side comes out. As Joan leaves, she suddenly sees the "lady in black," to her shock, but she later disappears. She sees her again, but it's revealed to be a mannequin, while the other woman was actually a cop in disguise. Why the search for the tag? Turns out, Columbo had evidence of Joan buying that same outfit, and it was from the same place that she buys all of her clothes from. So Joan has been caught, and afterwards, she voiced her heartbreak over David's affair, and actually admitted to feeling more comfortable being Lisa than she was when she was herself, a feeling that frightened her more than her eventual arrest.

"Sex and the Married Detective" was the third episode of Columbo's eighth season, and aired on April 3, 1989. The episode featured Lindsay Crouse as the episode's main villainess, Dr. Joan Allenby, who has to be the best villainess from the show's modern era. Joan was deliciously vengeful and elaborate; I loved everything about her, mainly her choice of disguise. She had that inner strength regardless, but as Lisa, she was bolder than ever, and she knew it. "Lisa" was Joan's inner femme fatale. Joan had it in her all along, and it took David's infidelity for her to come out in all of her evil and fiendish glory. Crouse was the true star of this episode, as she played out all of Joan's facets perfectly. Her strength, her vulnerability, her cunning, her ruthless nature, even her sadistic satisfaction of the completion of her evil scheme. All of it was played brilliantly by Lindsay Crouse.

Lindsay Crouse is known to fans of Buffy the Vampire Slayer as recurring villainess Maggie Walsh, and her long list of credits also include appearances in seven episodes of Law & Order: SVU as Judge Andrews. In fact, Crouse played judges on the original Law & Order as well, coming after appearing as evil psychiatrist Diane Meade in Season Three's "Promises to Keep."

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Check out Dr. Joan Allenby's profile on Villainous Beauties Wiki!