OK, Millennials: Lights, Camera, Action

Before I begin this treatise on Boomer vs. Millennial films, let me just say that many of my best friends are Millennials. In fact, my own children are Millennials, and as a group, you guys are as perfect as avocado toast. Those nasty comments about being self-indulgent and needing constant validation are so unkind; after all, we boomers were the ones giving out all those participation trophies to you, right? And if you were raised by a Gen X latchkey kid, we’re guilty of causing that reality too.

Now, with love in my heart for all you 28-41 year-olds, on to my “OK, Millennials, if you liked that early 2000 film, you’ll love my Boomer precursor.” Let me start by saying that I have avoided taking the easy way out by contrasting originals with reboots: Ocean's 11 1960 vs. 2001; The Producers 1968 vs. 2005; Shaft 1971 vs. 2000 (2019!). (Hmmm . . . that is interesting that so many films that you came of age with were reboots. Again, our fault.) Instead, I have tried to be creative and somewhat eclectic in my pairings. My boomer films all fall within the 1968-1972 period and the millennial films were released between 2000-2005. Enjoy.

Action Films with Cars

The Fast and the Furious (2001) vs. Bullitt (1968)

As the mother of two millennial sons, I wound up sitting through the entire F&F franchise over the years, usually after a heavy holiday meal. Those hours spent bounding over Paul Walker and Vin Diesel will never be forgotten, and I can measure family milestones by release dates.

While Mr. Vin Diesel (or is it just Mr. Diesel?) is ruggedly charming on screen, no one did the fast car action film better than Steve McQueen. He is pure bad ass. The Mustang GT he drives in the film is just as bad ass and recently sold at auction for almost $4 million. And one final point, the United States National Film Registry chose to preserve Bullitt because they consider it a "culturally, historically [and] aesthetically significant” film.

Somehow, I don’t think any of the titles from the F&F series will ever qualify.

Tear-Jerker Romances

The Notebook (2004) vs. Love Story (1970)

In early 2007, while marooned in rented cabin on a rainy day, I shuffled through a pile of DVDs, and upon spotting the iconic Ryan-Gosling-has-great-muscles-but-why-isn’t-Rachel-McAdams’s-eyeshawdow-not-running-down-her-cheeks-in-the-rain? cover, I decided to give the film adaptation of Nicholas Sparks’ best-seller a try. It was a mistake. In so many ways.

Now that you Millennials are beginning to reach early middle-age and have developed a more jaundiced eye towards romance, I think you would agree with me that saccharine love stories have their place . . . in a middle schooler’s streaming collection. However, if you’re pining to be swept away by a tragic love story with gorgeous actors, give Love Story a try.

Plot spoiler: One is rich, one is poor, and one of them dies.

Dramas with Soundtracks

8 Mile (2002) vs. Lady Sings the Blues (1972)

The 8 Mile soundtrack is so embedded in my mother of millennials brain that I can throw down the lyrics to “Lose Yourself” with the best—at least while I’m alone in the car. I also know all the dramatic nuances of the film, including the thrilling, à son point culminant (you can Google that) battle scene between Rabbit and Papa Doc.

Again, now that you are all adults, you probably have a general working knowledge of great pre-1990 musicians. (I assume most of you did take that World of Music easy-A course in freshman year.) So, if you love a drama about a singer struggling to make it, and you want to listen to a world class soundtrack, then check out Lady Sings the Blues, which stars Diana Ross and loosely follows the life of jazz great Billie Holiday.

It's a grown-up movie. Mic dropped.

Gritty NYC Dramas

Requiem for a Dream (2000) vs. Midnight Cowboy (1969)

Both of these films ran into ratings trouble, with Requiem for a Dream being given an NC-17 rating, so most of you likely didn’t actually see the film when it was released. (And if you snuck into the theatre or swiped your uncle’s DVD and actually liked it, then—well—I hope you are fully recovered.) Today, my feeling is this: count yourself lucky for having not seen this snooze that chronicles an unlikable character's descent into the raw world of addiction set in pre-gentrified Brooklyn. It’s just not a healthy film choice in this dystopian pandemic year we’ve been living through. Plus it's boring. - With Love, Your Virtual Boomer Mom

If you're looking for a tour of post-film noir New York, stream Midnight Cowboy instead. The old seedy, grimy Times Square—which none of you remember because all you know is the Disneyfied version—is the star of film, with Dustin Hoffman and Jon Voight playing brilliant supporting roles. While the film received an X-rating when it was first released, the sex scene which caught the eye of the censors is actually mild by today’s standards.

Cowboy is a true buddy film with heart.

Comedies with Mismatched Principle Characters

The Odd Couple (1968) vs. Stuck on You (2003)

I will admit that I cheated a bit in this category. If I were being fair, I would have expanded my Millennial film period to encompass 2008’s Step Brothers, and this match up would have been more of a competition. Film review sites stack it up this way: Odd Couple 7.7; Stuck on You 5.7; and Step Brothers 6.9. But Matt Damon as a comedic lead is just too low-hanging fruit in terms of film criticism to ignore. Sorry, he’s not funny. (And if you bring up Linus Caldwell in the Ocean’s 11 reboot, I will counter with “ensemble cast.”)

In the end, I think that we must all admit that the film version of Neil Simon’s play, The Odd Couple sets the standard for the mismatched buddy trope. But a big shout out to Step Brothers, a great example of the vulgar-stupid-boy-comedy genre.

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Thank you to all the Millennials who have taken the time out of their busy schedules to read through this admittedly non-exhaustive list of film comparisons. You have read nearly 1,200 words, which is about the length of a four-page double spaced essay of the type you wrote in high school and college.

Be sure to check your emails for a virtual participation trophy.