Haunted Mansion - A Movie Review

Are we really moving into a haunted mansion? Everyone warned us about it.

Haunted Mansion is a 2023 remake of the 2003 film. A single mother and her son take up residence in an ancient haunted mansion. Enlisting the aid of a tour guide, a psychic, a priest, and a historian they are on a quest to rid the place of any malevolent spirits.

Haunted Mansion is an unnecessary remake, lacking originality. Why not make it an actual story instead of making the film a full-length SNL skit of the actors doing their comedy routines, prolonging the film’s runtime?

Enlisting a noteworthy ensemble of actors who each have a talented background in acting or comedy, their performances are easily the best parts of the film. They’re fun to watch, have excellent chemistry, and enjoy their time working on the film. Aside from that, Haunted Mansion resembles a comedy show than a genuine attempt at making a film.

LaKeith Stanfield is the best performance. I have seen him in a handful of movies where he has maintained a versatile performance in each. In Haunted Mansion, Stanfield is the only one playing a character and has a backstory. Ben is the most interesting character out of any of them. Stanford delivered a tear-jerking monologue in the film about his deceased love.

You can never go wrong with good old Danny DeVito. The audience erupted in laughter when DeVito is hilariously carried away by a haunted chair. Haunted Mansion missed a huge opportunity! Lasting only five minutes, it would have been thrilling if a ghost overpowered DeVito’s character, adding more excitement to the film.

Surprisingly, I was wrong about my initial impression of Owen Wilson from the previews. Wilson is funny as a lackluster priest. Honestly, if this movie only had Stanfield and Wilson, it would have been satisfying. They worked well together.

More credits include Rosario Dawson, Tiffany Hadish, Jamie Lee Curtis, Chase Dillon, and a haunting appearance by Jared Leto. You don’t even recognize him with all the ghostly makeup and CGI effects.

The ensemble portrays exaggerated versions of their personas, failing to commit to their roles. It felt more like a reality show instead of a movie. Moreover, Curtis doesn't receive the screen time she deserves as the trapped medium, leaving audiences disappointed by this missed opportunity.

Haunted Mansion is so inconsistent. I got tired of it after an hour. Nothing much happens. For the majority actors are just sitting around laughing together in scenes. Justin Simien could have added more of a captivating narrative instead of having the actors do random things.

What audience is Haunted Mansion geared towards anyway? The film is childish but not enough to hold a child’s attention. Clocking in at two hours, the actors prolonged antics, leaving barely anytime for the ghosts. It could have been 90 minutes.

The visual effects in Haunted Mansion are worth noting, designing scary ghostly apparitions and captivating illusions. The aesthetics of the haunted mansion itself capture the spooky ambiance but unfortunately, these visuals don’t serve any purpose within the context of the film's non-existent storyline.

Why couldn’t we have spent more time on the ghost angle of the story? In my opinion, the comedic banter between the actors should have been limited so that the story about the haunted house’s history could have been expanded. That’s the movie I was here to see.

Haunted Mansion is a good laugh but the film doesn’t hold a lasting impression. I do recommend it for its funny nature but overall I was disappointed by the final product.