Why It Is Inappropriate To Say, 'Happy Memorial Day'

Memorial Day is a federal holiday celebrated on the last Monday in May every year. The purpose of the holiday is to remember those in the military who were wounded and killed. It is a misunderstood holiday because people get it mixed up with Veterans Day, which is celebrated on November 11 every year. Veterans Day celebrates all veterans.

In a proclamation about Memorial Day, President Donald Trump said Memorial Day is a day to “honor American heroes” and “especially remember[ed]” the 13 service members of the Joint Force who lost their lives in the war with Iran.

President Trump's proclamation said:

“All Americans inherit the glorious gift of liberty that has been purchased with the spilled blood of brave warriors and the tears and heartache of those they left behind. It is fitting and necessary for our nation to pause for an annual reminder of the enduring and perilously high cost of freedom, but the immeasurable gravity of what has been sacrificed for the greater good deserves our eternal reverence and unwavering gratitude every day.”

What to Say on Memorial Day

We know that on most holidays, we greet one another by saying, "Merry Christmas," "Happy Thanksgiving," "Happy Valentine's Day," or something similar. However, those greetings are inappropriate to say on Memorial Day.

Overall, the sentiment is that Memorial Day is not a holiday we should preface with a “happy” when greeting someone, although that is commonly how people greet one another throughout the holiday weekend, which serves as the unofficial kickoff to summer for many, who use the long weekend to gather with loved ones and barbecue or go to the beach.

The Code of Support Foundation, an organization that connects veterans and caregivers to resources they need, says that despite hearing “Happy Memorial Day” countless times each year, the day itself is “not a happy day,” especially for families and individuals who lost loved ones in combat.

The organization explained:

“It’s not a day intended to be celebrated in the traditional sense of that word.”

Instead, the Code of Support Foundation recommends alternatives like:

• “I wish you a meaningful Memorial Day.”
• “I hope you enjoy your weekend, and pause to remember its purpose.“
• “Help remember those who have served on this Memorial Day.“

Wounded Warrior Project also recommended wishing people a “meaningful Memorial Day” and noted that it is not appropriate to thank a service member for their service, as Memorial Day is for remembering and honoring those who “made the ultimate sacrifice.”

A North Carolina-based etiquette instructor, Sydney Dunn, said she tends to think of Memorial Day differently and suggested alternatives to saying, "Happy Memorial Day" because the day did not come about because of happy occasions.

Dunn added:

“We’re used to wishing people well around holidays and special events. And that’s an important way for us to connect as humans, but I tend to think of Memorial Day differently.”

The etiquette instructor also suggested some alternatives to “Happy Memorial Day,” which include:

• “I’m thinking of your family this weekend.”
• “Remembering those who have fallen.”
• “I’m grateful for the freedoms we hold while honoring the men and women who made it possible.”
• “Enjoy the long weekend, and remember why we’re off on Monday.”

Note from the Writer

The information provided in this article makes a lot of sense. Hopefully, people will take the suggestions and refrain from saying, "Happy Memorial Day" and use some of the recommended expressions. Feel free to share with others because when we know better, we can do better!

Related Articles About Memorial Day

• Reason Memorial Day Is Celebrated
• Memorial Day: A Misunderstood Federal Holiday