SELF-TALK

When the alarm goes off in the morning, you mutter to yourself, "Why did I set it so early?" Rushing out the front door, you reach for your keys and realize they aren't there. Frustrated, you yell, "I can't do anything right!" just in time to spot a neighbor. Talking to yourself can feel uncomfortable, and some people even label this behavior as a sign of mental instability. However, decades of psychological research show that talking to yourself is completely normal.

So why do we talk to ourselves and is it considered normal?

Self-talk refers to the story inside the head, sometimes called inner speech. This differs from mental images or memorizing facts and figures. In particular, psychologists define self-talk as verbal thoughts directed at yourself or some aspect of your life. This includes personal conversations like, "I need to work on my free throw." But it also includes thoughts you have throughout the day, like "The gym is full tonight. I'll be back tomorrow." And while most adult self-talk is silent, talking to yourself out loud also falls into this category. Psychologists believe that our first experiences of talking to ourselves are mostly vocal because children often talk to themselves out loud while playing.

Russian psychologist Lev Vygotsky hypothesized in the 1930s that such speech is actually the key to development. By repeating conversations with adults, children practice controlling their behavior and emotions. Then, as they get older, that external self-talk becomes internalized and becomes a private internal dialogue. We know that this inner self-talk is important and helps you plan, overcome difficult situations, and even motivate you throughout the day. But learning to talk about yourself can be difficult. It depends on subjects observing behavior that occurs spontaneously and often without conscious control. Therefore, researchers are still trying to answer basic questions like why do some people talk about themselves more than others. Which brain regions are activated during self-talk? And how does this activation differ from normal conversation? But we know for sure that what you say in these conversations can have an impact on your attitude and performance.

Coaching or motivational self-talk has shown to increase concentration, boost self-esteem, and help with daily tasks. For example, one study of college tennis players found that incorporating coaching self-talk into their practice increased their focus and accuracy. And just as talking to a friend can help reduce stress, talking directly to yourself can also help regulate emotions. Remote chat is when you talk to yourself as if you were talking to another person. Instead of saying, "I'm going to crush this exam," you can think, "Caleb, you're ready for this exam!" One study found that this type of self-talk was helpful in reducing stress during anxiety-provoking tasks such as meeting new people or public speaking. While positive self-talk can help you, negative self-talk can hurt you. Most people criticize themselves occasionally, but when this behavior becomes too frequent, it can become toxic. High levels of negative self-talk often predict anxiety in children and adults. Those who constantly blame themselves for their problems and think about these situations tend to experience stronger depression.

Today, there is an area of ​​psychological treatment called cognitive-behavioral therapy which focuses in part on regulating the tone of self-talk. Cognitive-behavioral therapists often teach strategies to recognize negative thought cycles and replace them with neutral or more compassionate reflections. Over time, these tools can improve mental health.

So the next time you find yourself talking to yourself, remember to be kind. This inner voice is a companion that you will talk to for many years.