The Borg Aren’t Swedish, Lily

by Will Stape 4 months ago in star trek

Star Trek’s Bionic Zombies Thrill Our Galaxy

The Borg Aren’t Swedish, Lily

The Borg aren’t Swedish. Nope. Not even a parsec close. Sorry, Lily, as much as they sound as if they’re working for IKEA, slinging Swedish meatballs in the food market cafe, those dangerous cyborgs don’t hail from Stockholm. Just ask Locutus—call him Jean-Luc Picard if you’re feeling sweetly nostalgic before his fabled Borgification.

See before loopy Locutus joined up with Borg, he spent time as a merry old Starfleet Captain, commanding a fabulous flagship Galaxy Class vessel, Enterprise 1701-D. Soon enough, we’ll all be watching him on CBS All Access in Star Trek: Picard—Jean-Luc that is, not Locutus. Then again, wait... Aren't they one and the same?

In Star Trek: First Contact, during Captain Picard’s valiant mission to thwart the onslaught of alien invaders, doubling as his reunion, if you will, with his old Borg buddies, he had a memorable exchange with Lily Sloane (Alfred Woodward)—warp drive creator scientist Zephram Cochrane’s ever-able assistant.

Picard “Good. They haven’t broken the encryption code yet.”

Lily, “Who? Those bionic zombies you told me about?”

Picard, “Borg.”

Lily, “Borg? Sounds Swedish.”

Ya know, maybe Lily’s really on to something special here. Let’s embark on a Borg Swedish exploratory expedition, and check it out together!

Resistance to Swedish Tennis Playing Is Futile

Bjorn Borg is Swedish, but he's not Borg.

Bjorn Borg is an internationally famous tennis player.

Borg once held the Number One tennis player title in the world. Yes, his name really is Borg. Over the years, he's won nearly a dozen tennis Grand Slams in the singles division. He’s definitely Borg, and he’s also definitely Swedish. He wields a tennis racquet as efficiently as Borg employs energy weapons. However, he doesn’t go around assimilating Starfleet crews, nor does he attempt to conquer their strategic outposts for invasion purposes.

IKEA - A Swedish Assimilation Process

Buy ready to assemble furniture here, but don't expect a Borg drone to help you.

IKEA is globally renowned for its unique furniture-selling stores. We visit an IKEA store to get affordable home furnishings, and often we assemble this inexpensive furniture ourselves. Get out that tool box, you Swedish furniture assembler, you! Live long and DIY!

IKEA even sounds like a cool Borg name. Locutus. Crosis. IKEA.

This sustains an all around excellent business model. It’s Swedish, and it allows for people to virtually assimilate a Swedish modern lifestyle. But, it’s not Borg—not the bionic zombie, cyborg invaders Picard and his infinitely intrepid Starfleet band of brothers love to take on and battle across the universe.

Even Borg Love Swedish Meatballs

These aren't Borg batteries - just Swedish Meatballs.

Who doesn’t love Swedish meatballs? Visiting an IKEA Concept Center will get you closer to those lovely meat bombs. Sniff! Can't you smell em cookin?

They’re always hot and tasty. They’re oh so Swedish, and intricately meaty. Even most any Borg drone, intent on assimilating or not, would probably not be able to turn down a big plate of steaming Swedish meatballs. This Earth nation delicacy is of Swedish origin, not Borg, yet the Borg would most likely assimilate a big helping of them.

Worf's big line in Star Trek: First Contact was, 'Assimilate this!'—did he actually mean phaser rifle fire or Swedish meatballs?

Seven Of Nine Is Borg, Maybe She’s Also Swedish

Am I Swedish? Who Cares, I Rock The Borg Look!

Finally, we come to a most popular former Borg drone—Seven Of Nine herself from Star Trek: Voyager, played by the wonderful actress Jeri Ryan.

Seven of Nine fans, don't drone on in despair. She’ll also be joining in on the sci-fi fun of Star Trek: Picardon CBS All Access. This is a tough one, because before she was assimilated by the Borg, Seven’s name was Anika Hansen. Swedish? Hmmmm. Maybe. Just as Lily said to Captain Picard in Star Trek: First Contact, ‘Sounds Swedish.’

star trek
Will Stape
Will Stape
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Will Stape

Screenwriter, book author, and producer. Wrote for 'Star Trek: The Next Generation & Deep Space Nine,' and has created docudramas for cable TV and the web.

See all posts by Will Stape