Wise People Write About Sex
And we don’t care if you don’t like it.
I’m flattered you’re here. Really. I get it. We seem to have adopted a notion in that wise people are usually quite humdrum, principled and sober with a sense of humor like sour milk.
That’s not you, though, is it?
Some people don’t like that I write about sexuality from time to time, using my body of work and creative expression as some kind strategic attempt to judge, ridicule and mess with my personal life.
I guess it happens to the best of us — or rather, those of us who have the courage to write what we want; freely expressing ourselves through our creativity without concern for the opinions of others.
As it is, I am going to go ahead and suggest that the above-mentioned would-be do-gooders avoid reading my shit. But I’m not daft enough to actually think that will happen because the prospect of gathering snark on me is just too good to resist for some.
What is it about sex that gets people all knicker-tied and prancy, anyway?
As if it isn’t a natural part of being human.
I am certain that I am not the only writer here who cops flak because we write about sex. At least, those among us who don’t write under a pen name.
Right? We have all experienced difficult people who are drawn to the reasonable ones. It comes with the turf when you choose to be yourself and dare to be a little different, like writing about perceived “taboo” topics.
But that’s okay because I have reached a point in my life where I care less about those with dim-witted outlooks and irrelevant opinions to impart my way.
Whatever happened to live and let live?
Bernard M. Baruch said:
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
There is so much truth in those words.
Personally, I believe that life is too short not to liberate yourself from conformity. Definitely too fleeting to be a people-pleaser.
I learned long ago to drop the need to seek outside approval in order to feel at ease with myself.
1. Other people don’t know you
I figure that it does not pay to care too much about other people’s opinions of me because no one truly knows me.
I’ve spent the time getting to know myself and believing in that person; reflecting on the past — mistakes made, killer heart-pain and great love, and then facing the truth of how those experiences have changed and transformed me, stimulated inner-growth, given me strength and propelled personal evolution.
I know what and who matters most to me.
2. Your creativity is abundant
No one can hold you back when it comes to your imagination and creativity.
Remember how Einstein said that imagination is more important than knowledge?
That’s because your imagination is an unlimited resource that births progress and evolution. A bit like sex, really.
Only you know what inspires you and what drives you. Likewise, only I know what lies deep within my heart’s desire, and I won’t allow the fickle viewpoints of others to interfere with my creative freedom and dreams.
3. People have baggage
Other people project their issues on you because they are not as aware about who they are, what they want and where they have been.
It’s true that when someone criticizes and belittles others it is much more about something they personally regret or resent about their own lives than it is about their “gossip” target.
I think that the ego comes into play here, too.
Sometimes, a person will feel invalidated or threatened by someone who puts themselves out there in ways that they themselves never could, choosing to focus on feeling insulted by your sense of inner-freedom rather than celebrating liberation and free speech.
It’s completely absurd.
I don’t mean to add insult to injury here, but usually, there is a “prudish” element in the type of person who easily takes offence.
Prudish People Are Not Happy People
Being a prude is a recipe for hypocrisy. It’s a self-serving, obstinate and ignorant way of being that limits your … erm … very limited time here, in this life.
You know what else?
Wisdom doesn’t make people prudish.
Quite the opposite.
Most people who regard themselves as intelligent, sophisticated, and well-educated despise prudery about sex because to be wise is to possess the fundamental ability to pivot and sway across the widest possible repertoire of human behaviors.
Sex Makes the World Go Around
Sexuality is a uniquely human trait and one of the fundamental drives behind everyone’s feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. It assists psychological and sociological representations of self, aligns a person’s attraction to others and shapes the brain and body to be pleasure-seeking.
Sounds like sexuality is an important part of being human to me.
So why then, is the topic often considered taboo? Further, why do the prudish at heart insist on consuming content they deem “offensive” only to use it as outrage-ammunition against those who are sexually-expressed?
It’s an interesting question and one that I cannot fully answer.
Apart from the fact that wise, open-minded people know that for almost as long as we have been having sex, we have been creating art, writing, and talking about it.
Folks who dare to openly express their feelings about sexuality know how to go with the flow. Lifelong, these types accumulate and refine knowledge of the differences that make a difference. Whereas, prudes are the kind of imbeciles who wander through life blinded by their self-infatuated, finger-pointing principles which serve no purpose other than to quench a warped sense of self-righteous nonsense.
For instance, an insightful, sexually expressed person is a sensual person by nature — making love is all about connecting deeply, and enhancing and appreciating the sensory experience with their lover.
This is the person who makes it their business to learn the difference between performing a good blowjob versus a great blowjob. Moreover, he or she realizes that the art of fellatio is a true meditation.
As is the exquisite craft of cunnilingus.
Uh-oh — I just mentioned blowjobs.
Someone call Jesus.
Prudish people hate the whole mouth-to-dick act, much preferring to spend their time licking their partner’s anus while pretending their shit doesn’t stink.
That might sound smutty and crude on my part but fortunately, Psychology Today has my back in this instance:
“The wise can be vulgar, snarky, hypocritical, or deceptive if a situation calls for it. They are, in that respect, the opposite of prudes. Prudes are superstitious and simplistic. They limit their repertoires based on half-witted notions of good and bad.”
One day, I am going to be dead. There is no way in hell that I’m going to die after a lifetime of suppressing myself to appease the closed-minded ideals of others.
Wise people write about sex if they want to.
Again, we seem to have adopted a notion in that wise people are usually quite humdrum, principled and sober with a sense of humor like sour milk.
That’s not you, though, is it?