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Why Women Need Twice the Amount of Sex As Men

You will feel better in your relationship if you understand female sex psychology.

By Mind & RelationshipsPublished 3 years ago 7 min read
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Most people are unaware of the one difference between the male and female brains, and how it could be affecting your relationships.

Have you ever been in a relationship that didn't work out?

Did you ever get the feeling that your partner didn't understand you?

Two of the most common explanations for relationships and marriages falling apart, according to study, are:

1. A Failure in Interaction.

2. Libido Variations.

Men are often thought to want sex more than women, according to popular belief.

This is totally false, and I'll clarify why in this post (along with how to level the playing field when it comes to sex drive).

And it's not that there isn't enough contact when it comes to "lack of communication"...

...it's that both men and women have no idea how their brains function.

I'm going to break down neuroscience for you so that you can:

  • learn how your brain functions
  • what goes on in your partner's head,
  • and how to use what you've learned to better your relationships.

Male Vs. Female Brain

One of the fascinating aspects of our brain is that the left and right sides of our brain operate in very different ways.

THE MALE LEFT BRAIN

Our brain's left side is rather mechanistic; it is task-oriented, strategic, mathematical, and linear.

The "male" brain is what this is referred to as.

Of course, this isn't to suggest that women can't be strategic, mathematical, or linear, but these traits are more common in men.

Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that resides in the left brain.

(Imagine a neurotransmitter as a brain hormone.)

Your motivation is derived from dopamine.

Remember how good it felt to cross something off your to-do list? Or when a Facebook friend likes your status update?

That's dopamine at work.

To put it another way, when you do something that increases your dopamine levels, you're more likely to do it again to get the same dopamine boost and good feelings in your brain.

You will remain engaged, passionate, and inspired to complete tasks when you have high motivation.

What's great about dopamine is that you can increase your own levels.

THE RIGHT BRAIN (FEMALE)

Things get a bit more complex when we step towards the right brain.

The right hemisphere of the brain is more sensual.

It's more imaginative. It's a very stressful situation. It's all about the passion.

This is more about the “female” brain, and while men may be sensual and passionate, these are more feminine characteristics.

This is where our happy hormone, serotonin, resides.

Serotonin is a neurotransmitter found in the right side of the brain, and the difference is that you can't lift your own serotonin levels.

EXTERNALLY, serotonin is elevated.

Strong reviews from our loved ones, our workplace, and our surroundings all help to boost our happiness.

Since serotonin raises dopamine levels, it's important to recognise this.

As a result, the more positive reinforcement we get from our external environment in the form of encouragement and gratitude, the more inspired we are to keep doing the action that earned us the praise.

In the background of your relationship, your partner increases YOUR serotonin levels.

So you get positive feedback from your partner, which raises your serotonin levels, which in turn raises your dopamine levels.

RIGHT NOW THIS IS THE PART THAT WILL BLOW YOUR MIND...

Despite the fact that women are more right-brained, men have 50 percent more serotonin receptors than women.

Increased by 50%!

So, what does this mean in terms of intimate relationships?

Women want twice as much as men:

  • affection and passion
  • positive reinforcement from the outside world

To evoke the same neurochemical cascade, women need more motivation along the way.

If she does not receive positive feedback from her surroundings, her serotonin levels will decrease, and her dopamine levels will follow.

The Dopamine-Serotonin Dance

As previously stated, increased serotonin levels lead to increased dopamine levels.

The Serotonin and Dopamine Dance in a Positive Light:

My clinical practise generates a lot of positive feedback (serotonin) because patients always tell me how much of a difference I've made in their lives.

I've seen athletes achieve new personal bests, fathers be able to play with their children again, and women say their headaches are gone and they've never felt so energised and satisfied.

I tell myself all the time that I can't wait to do it all over again tomorrow!

What really happens in this positive feedback loop in neurotransmitter land is that I get a serotonergic boost from my external environment, which boosts my motivation (dopamine).

This motivates me to continue to improve as a doctor and to serve others.

To put it another way, when your serotonin levels are up, your dopamine levels are high as well.

A Negative Example of the Serotonin — Dopamine Dance: A woman wants to express her love and affection for her male partner. She spends the day researching recipes and preparing his favourite meal, as well as cleaning the house. She has her hair, makeup, and everything else done, and she's all perfumed and ready to go.

Her partner arrives home in a foul mood or exhausted. He doesn't want to interact with her and just prefers to relax in front of the television.

What will happen to her dopamine (motivator) and serotonin (happiness) levels?

Simply put, since she expects a result that suits her efforts, this will be neurochemically devastating.

If she does not receive the feedback she expects, she will be less motivated to do so in the future.

Dopamine levels drop as serotonin levels drop.

What happens to her motivation (dopamine) when this happens again? Is this the tenth time? Is it for the hundredth time?

BABY, LET'S DISCUSS SEX.

This is where things start to get a bit more interesting.

The reason I'm telling you this is because you can't talk about an epic, legendary relationship without considering sex, right?

So, what exactly is a normal sex life?

Two to three times a week, according to the data.

So, in terms of males and females, who needs more sex?

It's a woman!

Women NEED positive feedback from their partners in order to increase serotonergic pathways in the brain, and thus dopamine levels.

Isn't sex the purest, most intimate form of communication and connection we have with our partners?

Intimacy, link, confidence, and bonding take place here.

As a result, I totally reject the notion that men are only interested in sex and women love chocolate.

If a woman feels nourished, cherished, cared for, and honoured, she will pursue sex like an animal in order to get the serotonergic burst in her brain, and she will be inspired to be the best partner she can be.

Now, I understand that this may be difficult for some to accept, but understanding that health is an active process and that a woman's health is a direct reflection of her relationship with her partner is essential.

A woman requires love, honour, esteem, and protection.

Let's not forget about the guys. Our guys, too, need to be valued and respected.

Men are unable to bear children or breastfeed, but they are eager to assist you, ladies!

Thank them for taking out the garbage, repairing your phone, or just being a wonderful person who solves problems for you.

This would also increase his serotonin and dopamine levels, motivating him to be the best partner he can be for you.

Show them some love and admiration for their unique genius and abilities.

Failure to understand and support your man in a relationship will cause him to withdraw from you. He is unappreciated for his efforts and contributions.

As a woman, you will begin to feel less empowered, less loved, and less inspired as your man pulls away, and you will begin to fall away as well.

A neural reason for our country's 70% divorce rate, as well as the cause of most disputes in your life.

Going Forward

Remember the serotonin — dopamine relationship and the discrepancies between men and women when you're dating, in a relationship for a minute or a decade.

Women in your life, whether it's your girlfriend or a coworker, need more positive reinforcement than men.

Although the men around you do not need as much positive affirmation, they do need gratitude in order to stay motivated to serve you.

They must be treated with dignity.

Like what you've read so far? Send me a gift below to contribute to my next article!

sexual wellness
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About the Creator

Mind & Relationships

Writer, Director and Producer of @sirenVD | Author of #DepressionToMotivation

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