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Tips to Achieve Your Ultimate O

Stop Faking It in the Bedroom

By Ashlyn HarperPublished 5 years ago 4 min read
Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

What is something that humans and animals have in common? That would be sex. The difference between us and most animals is that we actually can enjoy this act recreationally instead of using it just as a tool to procreate. With something that feels so incredibly amazing for both men and women, there seems to be an imbalance. I recently read that up to 80 percent of women fake it in bed. While this is an enormous percentage, it didn't really surprise me.

It's a simple fact that most women take a little more time to achieve an orgasm. Not because we are difficult creatures, but because we just have a little more going on down in that vicinity. Most, if not all, men can easily achieve orgasm with a simple pumping motion. Women usually need some form of foreplay, different speeds, and simultaneous "foreplay" action during intercourse. Ladies, you should not be faking it in the bedroom. Whoever you are with should want you to enjoy sex, and, frankly, we deserve to enjoy it.

If you find yourself ending sex a little unsatisfied or having to push him into orgasm mode to end things then it might be time to change it up. I was the same way a few years back. I had an extremely low libido compared to other women my age and never really wanted to have sex. Therefore, I faked it more than I would ever like to admit (sorry, love). After trying these tips out, I can now positively say that I rarely ever fake it, and sex has become more exciting for the both of us. Don't just trust me; try out these tips below to achieve your ultimate O.

Communicate. Communicate. Communicate

I cannot stress this tip enough to you. A huge reason women (and males, for that matter) end up faking an orgasm is because they simply would rather end it than tell their partner how they feel. I completely get it; saying you are not enjoying yourself seems hurtful and a huge turnoff. Stop thinking of it as a talk that points out a negative but more navigating towards the positive.

Trust me, your partner wants you to enjoy yourself during sex. Not only is it a turn on to see you loving a certain feeling, but it usually gives them a great confidence boost. We know our bodies and what feels good. Next time you are having sex, guide them to a certain move or massage by saying, “You know what I would love?” It is a huge turn on to hear someone come out and say what they like and will guarantee you that amazing O you deserve.

Know your body.

Obviously, you cannot produce an orgasm with another human if you don't even know what makes that magical moment happen. Ladies and gents: You need to masturbate. I don't care how you do it or what you have to watch or fantasize about, but it is incredibly beneficial to try out. Not only will this help teach you what your body likes, but it can give you great ideas for foreplay.

I masturbate, and I'm extremely open about that with my partner. This is hot for him to think about, and he usually incorporates my moves in the bedroom with both of us. You can even slow down sex and try touching different areas of each other. Touching can be extremely erotic and might teach you about their likes and desires and vice versa.

Try out new moves.

If you do the same position day in and day out, you typically get bored pretty quickly. While it might be a turn on and working for you (good for you!), chances are that you fake it a few times during this excursion. Again, no partner will get mad if you want to try out a new move. Finding different positions could help you find a perfect g-spot movement that drives you wild.

My advice would simply be to pick up a Kamasutra book or cosmopolitan magazines (they have loads of different positions). Give each one a try and see if you like it. If you hate it you can simply go back to a position you know works effectively. For some reason, we take sex too seriously sometimes. Sex is fun! Don't worry about looking like an idiot while on top (that is the last thing they are thinking, anyway).

Warm up before play time.

If you are with someone who doesn't want to warm up before jumping in, they are either extremely self-centered or just straight up naive when it comes to foreplay. I have had partners that went straight into a thrusting motion. For one, most women need a little warm-up before starting off just for natural lubrication purposes. It is also less likely I am going to orgasm if you do the unforgivable "jackrabbit" routine for five minutes straight.

Again, women have more to them then the simple up, down, orgasm. Warming up by sensual touching, erotic talking, or fun foreplay is fun for both parties involved and extremely sexy. You could even potentially have your ultimate O in this stage alone! Don't underestimate a good warm up.

Overall, sex needs to be fun for both parties. If you are not enjoying yourself make sure to speak up. It isn't heroic to be silent for their benefit. By communicating and changing things up, you might just find yourself enjoying sex a lot more and actually achieve your ultimate O instead of pretending to. After all, an actual orgasm feels pretty great!


About the Creator

Ashlyn Harper

A chaotic room of stories. My curiosities lead me in all types of directions, creating a chaotic writing pathway. I want this place to be for experimenting, improving my craft, and sharing new ideas with anyone willing to read them.

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