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Tinder Tattle: Hotwife Messages Sexy, Single Man for Drink

We all know why we’re on Tinder. Or, do we?

By Belle du JourneyPublished 3 years ago 4 min read
Tinder Tattle: Hotwife Messages Sexy, Single Man for Drink
Photo by Mika Baumeister on Unsplash

The following is a transcript of a real conversation I had on Tinder this week with a guy I’m calling Kyle. Names are protected for privacy reasons. I’ve written this article in the third person for editorial reasons. For your enjoyment, I’ve added some commentary or asides using [] like these.


Wednesday @ 7:30 a.m.

Never one to shy away from making the first move, Belle types: Hey! Are you having a nice day?

Kyle: Now that I see your message I’m having a good day. How about you?

Belle: I’m procrastinating about going to the gym. But I’m in Portland, Oregon for the summer and looking to meet people. Staying with elderly relatives. [Meaning she can’t host]

Kyle: You could run away in my direction.

Belle: Tell me more about yourself? [Adding some flattery, I state] FYI, you’re one of the few guys I’ve seen on Tinder who doesn’t look like Grizzly Adams.

Kyle: I feel very unique in this city. [Cryptic but interesting]

He still hasn’t answered my question. Let me try another angle.

Belle: I bet. Just the lack of a beard?

Kyle: Some people are into that [beard]. I’m hairless like a dolphin. [All good]

O.K. My secondary question didn’t work. Time to be more direct.

Belle: What are you looking for? And, please don’t say me. Are you single, etc.? Can you host?

Kyle: I’m single and live alone. I even have some dumbbells if you want to give them a try. [seems quick-witted]

He still hasn’t answered any of my questions. No wonder he’s single.

Belle: Where are you based? [I’m away from home so need to confirm Kyle lives where I do.]

Kyle: (Gives a neighbourhood somewhere near mine)

Belle: We’re relatively close. Interested in going for a drink over the weekend?

Kyle: The weekend is so far away. [so far, so good]

Belle responds more assertively: I’m free tomorrow night. Pick a time and place.

Kyle: I thought you were free now since you are procrastinating. [Cheeky bugger]

Belle: Gotta get to the gym. Let me know about tomorrow night. [It’s important to set the tone upfront. Never be available immediately! Make Kyles work for it. It makes him want the prize — you — more. This is a test. Don’t fall for it.]

Kyle: Ah! So you are going to the gym.

I’m thinking, is this guy daft? He’s been lucky enough to meet a hotwife on Tinder. And, she’s asked him out for a drink. This should be every man’s fantasy. Is he going to take the bait?

Here’s how Kyle responds:

Kyle: Tomorrow could work. If you get bored tonight, I’ll be watching the sunset and dancing.

Frustrated with Kyle, Belle shuts down the conversation by typing: Talk later. Enjoy tonight. Sounds fun.

It’s now 8:25 a.m.


Afterwards, I reflected on this bizarre Tinder conversation. I’ve been a hotwife for over two years now and I’ve never met a man who didn’t want to meet me. Some were interested in sex, others were curious about the lifestyle; and a few about the hotwife experience. But, this was the first time I ever had a man flat-out ignore my expressed interest to get together with him for a drink.

At this point, I figured I wouldn’t hear from him again. But you’ll never guess who messaged me the following morning — you guessed right! — Kyle. Look at what he had to say.


Thursday @ 10:41 a.m.

Kyle: Hi, how’s your morning going?

At this point, I read the message and chose not to respond. I mistakenly thought there might also be a follow-up suggesting a location for a drink that evening. Nope, I was wrong. Not Kyle. Other guys might do that but not losers like Kyle. He just ignored my suggestion.

3:06 p.m.

Kyle messages me again: Uh oh. I lost you. Classic.

4:59 p.m.

Belle responds: No, you didn’t. [thinking you loser] You just didn’t follow up when I asked you to find a place for a drink. I think I even mentioned it twice.

Kyle: That doesn’t mean you can’t answer my question from this morning. [Are you getting snippy with me Kyle? You sound like a toddler.]

In my mind, I began to think about what a passive-aggressive little-you-know-what Kyle is. No wonder he’s single.

I didn’t immediately respond to this message either. Ordinarily, I would have unmatched from a jerk like this but I decided I could have fun with Kyle. By now, I’d decided this bizarre Tinder experience would make a good article for Medium.

11:11 p.m.

Kyle: So when are we meeting?


10:30 a.m.

Bye-Bye Kyle. Belle cuts bait and unmatches from Kyle on Tinder.

The moral of this Tinder vignette is to listen to your senses.

If you’re a man and a woman asks you out for a drink, please say yes. Show her you’re a man of action by suggesting a time and place. Women like that. However, be prepared for her to suggest changes. Don’t be a Kyle. She may be thinking about her personal safety. Or, she might be a control freak. You should be careful too.

If you’re not interested, please be kind and tell her quickly. Be a gentleman, not a troll.

If you’re a woman who wants/needs sex and a man won’t answer your questions on Tinder. Give him the boot! Unless you think you could use the encounter creatively like I am. If the man is like Kyle, he doesn’t deserve your company, let alone access to your pussy.

© Copyright Belle Du Journey, 2021


About the Creator

Belle du Journey

Belle du Journey writes about her adventures in life. Her interests are diverse and include sexuality, polyamory, parenting and travel.

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