Filthy logo

Stigmatization of Masturbation

Stigmas between Male and Female genital masturbation

By Kaitlynn EsquibelPublished 2 years ago 3 min read
2
Stigmatization of Masturbation
Photo by Diana Măceşanu on Unsplash

In the United States many of us can agree that sex education needs to be adapted and be more inclusive. Speaking personally the sex education I received in my school was heavily abstinent influenced. No sex before you are married if you are a female. My class at the time had both Males and Females in the class and at the time I didn't realize until I was older that the topics we covered were mostly related to the male anatomy including ailments such as erectile dysfunction. We never touched on female genital ailments such as Endometriosis. I had no idea what most ailments were for females until I was in my 20's even now I still don't know much. I can sit here all day and talk about changes to the sex education system but that's not what this article is mainly about.

When I was in college I took a course on "Psychology of Women and Gender Studies". We were discussing the sex education system and in our textbooks there was a sub chapter on the stigmas of masturbation. I have slept since taking this course but I do remember my thoughts upon reading this section in the textbook.

In a way it opened my eyes seeing that those that identify as cis gendered males in our society we expect them to masturbate and see this as normal as males have "urges" and it is a way to control those urges but if a cis gendered female were to masturbate there is a shameful context to it as females are made to suppress those urges and remain "pure" and it is seen as dirty to indulge in that which is normal for the male counterpart.

I know there are plenty of sex toys out there for female and male genitalia alike. That doesn't mean that their won't be a stigma for females that choose to use them from society telling them that they shouldn't be doing what they are doing. If a male were to buy a sex toy to pleasure themselves then that is okay? There could be a million different toys out their for male or female genitalia but the females would still get stuck with the stigmas that they shouldn't be doing that and touching themselves.

A friend of mine disclosed that when they were younger that their parent caught them touching themselves for the first time and was told by the parent that she shouldn't do it and that it is a nasty thing for a female to do to themselves. She was mortified enough about being caught in her bedroom of all places and more importantly be her parent. She said she felt immense shame and promised the parent that she wouldn't touch herself again. A time before that I had a step brother whom when I was visiting my father, my step mother and step sister were making fun of him for catching him in the act of masturbation. It wasn't full on shaming him if anything comments were being made like "He was beating his meat" and so on. I made the comment about "girls do it too" to which my stepmother replied "Ew, that's what a man is for". In that instance they were praising my stepbrother but shaming any female that chose to do the same.

Masturbation is a healthy exploration of ones body and helps you know what you like before fully being sexual with another. So why are we quick to throw shame and other stigmas on the subject regardless of gender? Will society ever fully accept and destigmatize masturbation for all?

feminism
2

About the Creator

Kaitlynn Esquibel

Sometimes all you need is a good book and a cup of tea to start the day off right. Other times it's life that throws a story at you and you can't help but catch it and run with all the crazy twists and turns life throws your way.

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2024 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.