Sexuality and Mental Illness

Being sexually active has its perks. However, it is not always a walk in the park.

Let us all take a minute and reflect on our own sexual preferences.

Let me preface this by saying I do not condone incest or underaged sex in any capacity.

With that being said, however, I place a lot of weight on my sex life, and you should read why and maybe prioritize it a bit more for yourself.

Sex is sex. If it's quick or if it's long. It's shallow or intimate.

My sex life is very demanding. It is demanding because there are a few things I can't get in such quality or quantity. I enjoy role play; my other half is my protector. Now this role is our lifestyle. I am naturally submissive so most of my life revolves around that dynamic.

I tend to require more sex. Sex feels, well, just amazing. I enjoy the sex I have. However, it is rarely what I picture it in my head. The concept of love and support and a little bit of a challenge is what is important. All of those things are important outside of the bedroom too.

In the bedroom you should be able to be present and mindful. That means even if you are trying something new, you should still be able to feel excited. That is why I found roleplay.

I would say my sex life is roleplay mixed with soft BDSM. I have a pretty high pain tolerance so my wonderful s/o has to sort of adjust a bit; a challenge for him. My end of the deal is that I need to give up control sometimes... being stubborn that is fairly hard to do. In this sex life dynamic we as a couple actually foster personal growth.

That is why we have sex often. That is a huge moment for self and external exploration and growth. It also feels pretty good, and in itself you get your typical release and love and support.

I used to cry if I couldn't perform. I used to feel horrible and really uncomfortable. It still happens, but now I can laugh about it if I pass gas or things happen a bit earlier than I had hoped.

Sex has actually saved my life both physically and mentally. I have more confidence in my business or personal relationships than I have ever had before.

Sex helps build or break peoples' confidence. It helps relationships or ruins them. Not once have I ever been comfortable saying I have kinks or fetishes. Now I can say I do and at least be okay with it.

Never being interested in men has always been a confusing point for me. Being in a longterm relationship with a man is a confusing time for this woman. I have learned so much in such a short window of time about my body and myself that I know so much more now. I know more than I would have known being single or sexless.

It is never too late to try something new. If it sounds interesting, do it. If you gain comfort in it — keep doing it. Sex should never be stressful. You should always look forward to being naked with yourself or anyone else. Don't let shame and fear affect your abilities to love and be love by others. Keep physical communication open in any capacity. There are tons of benefits for yourself.

Without sex I would not be the person I am today and I would honestly hate to see who I would be — I would be unhappy inside and out.