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Sex with a long-distance boyfriend online: the sex diary.

The brilliant thing about them is that I can combine my two hobbies and write about sex, as contrary to popular belief, you don’t need to be a sex blogger or an erotica writer to write about sex.

By Fluo & PatternPublished 4 years ago 5 min read
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Sex with a long-distance boyfriend online: the sex diary.
Photo by Shaira Dela Peña on Unsplash

Morning sex can bring you and your partner closer together. How so? Sex produces oxytocin, also known as the “cuddle hormone.” Oxytocin is the chemical in the brain that controls love and bonding. When it’s released during sex, you’ll feel more connected to your partner.

Want to give your brain power a boost? Morning sex is the answer. Multiple studies show that getting busy releases a mix of neurotransmitters and hormones— in particular, dopamine, the feel-good hormone — that can benefit brain health and cognition.

Morning sex may be your very own fountain of youth. Some experts think that sex is the key to looking younger because it releases oxytocin, beta endorphins, and other anti-inflammatory molecules. BBC News reported that older research suggests having sex at least three times a week can make you look several years younger than people who have less sex. Orgasms can even benefit your skin in several ways!

Favourite Sexual Memories

Once you are a little more comfortable with writing about sex, write about your favourite sexual memories. It is journaling, remembering and processing it all over again. You need to focus and remember, you need to find the right words to express what happened, how you felt.

Taking it even further, if you are already comfortable writing about your memories, detailing them as much as you feel like detailing them, you can get into exploring your own fantasies and finding out what it is that really turns you own.

Writing about your fantasies, whether you are single or coupled, is helping you to know yourself better — in the most intimate ways possible.

It was not lost on me that most of the diaries I was staring at in that period were written by men. Male diarists are typically much more expansive in their sense of options, and therefore so are their realities. What men excel at, I realized, is identifying what they want in the immediate term.

Rather than trying to define our relationship, I simply focused on it, with lots of together time. In the intervening years (it's been three now) a gentle definition arose, by watching what it is that we tend to do naturally. And what we do is this: enjoy and nurture our relationship and fill our lives with a select group of deeply friends/lovers to dabble with when one of us is traveling or needs attention. It's a nuanced relationship that shifts to meet needs that themselves shift over time.

I like things like BDSM and sensation play. I enjoy sexual contact that is much more intentional, and where connection is much more powerful. I like choose my sex together to him.

It's a shame though, as I feel like a creative person in most areas of my life – but, in bed, my timidity has meant that creativity deserts me.

So I spent that evening bouncing around because something reeeeally great was going to happen to meeeeee the next day. Today we were halfway engaged, but tomorrow we'd be fully engaged. It was among the happiest nights of my life. I knew that getting asked twice wasn't the norm, but it was what I wanted. So I asked for it.

The imaginary new home, the room of the sex.

I proposed that we retire to my room, which we did, and we proceeded to have a really lovely time. Everything was hunky-dory, except that on the couple of occasions when we engaged in penetrative sex, he lost his erection.

Piece of the favorite book sex on the telephone. The reading to him best piece on the sex.

Getting used to the words and expressions in writing can help you verbalise your wishes — in a subtle or straightforward way, depending on the situation and your personality. It can help to get better at erotic talk (aka dirty talk, which is not at all dirty in the negative sense of the word).

You don’t need to be an aspiring sex writer. You don’t need to write erotica or porn. You don’t need to step out of your comfort zone — at all. Writing about sex is about creating a safe space for yourself, where you are free, where you are you — with all your needs and wants about the most natural thing in the whole world: sex.

A romantic sex diary, share with friends all the our secrets and the moments unforgettable.

I want say to you: "I love you" and "I missing you".

I want from you the next best surprise.

By freestocks on Unsplash

Visualise Your Dream Sex Life

You can use writing as a way of visualisation. Visualisation, as a technique is used for self-improvement and growth — and it’s used by athletes and entrepreneurs, to define how the imagine the realisation of their desired self. Putting a finger on your yeses and nos is extremely helpful to define your north star, to set your dreams and decide on your goals. It can work also when it comes to your dream sex life.

Masturbation. Best real life also if him there isn't in the bed.

Best thinking to every hours.

At the moment I’m having masturbation sex three or four times a week, which is great. Of course, it’s really hot when you’re at the start of a relationship and having interesting or intense sex frequently. I do feel like people in long-term relationships are put under pressure if they’re not having sex that often, and that’s not really fair. On the other hand, it’s very easy to slip into not really having sex or talking about sex at all in a long-term relationship, and that’s difficult in a different way. You can just sleepwalk into becoming platonic friends.

Share all the things, big and small.

Don’t pressure yourself to only talk when you have a long time, but also share the small moments, a la “I saw this thing and it made me think of you.” Quick check-ins and shares—whether on your long call or via a quick text—are equally important for staying intimate and connected.

Long distance relationship come with their own unique challenge.

With a bit of creativity and a whole lot of communication, yours can be as intimate, exciting, and fulfilling as when you are together.

sexual wellness
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About the Creator

Fluo & Pattern

Makeup artist, fashion/beauty blogger.

Journalist, editor and writer, and body painter of events and TV show.

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