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searching for a sub part 3

by Lena Bailey 2 years ago in relationships
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the madness continues

So if you hadn't read the other parts please do so. This is more of my search for a sub. I have been at this for a few months on and off. So let's get back into it.

One thing I forgot to mention in my previous posts was that there was a guy I was talking to who blocked me just because I was plus sized. I get not everyone is into plus sized people but that's not a reason to block someone. You block someone because they won't leave you alone or they are truly rude. When I say rude I mean rude I don't mean them being honest and hurting your feelings.

I also ran into another guy I knew was just out for sex and play. This one crossed a line, a very fine line. He didn't even ask if I was still looking or nothing just immediately into asking questions like "what do you look like?" Then I told him I'm looking for a relationship and he said that he was too. Then literally in the next message he asked me how big my tits and ass are and if I could squirt. I just laughed, of course I would get the sex obsessed guy. The lifestyle is very sexual and people think that it's just about sex. You can do a lot in this lifestyle without even touching each other's privates.

Then there is the crown jewel of them all so far. I get this message from this guy and we started to talk. I did what most people did (or what I thought most people did) and just went about my business, getting to his messages when I got to them. I started to notice I would get his messages right away and I noticed that I would get messages like "Are you there? Did you get busy?" So the next day I told him I thought that he wanted more attention than I could give and he got pissed then lashed out. He said "you must be an hourly worker as you don't understand etiquette", those things are not related. It's also insulting for someone to assume you are a certain way because of your job. I have heard of a lot of salary workers that know less about etiquette than hourly workers. One thing that made laugh was that he was saying that being an adult is about respecting people's time and yet he thinks I have to clear my schedule to sit down and talk to a total stranger. Also if etiquette is so damn important to this person why would they insult me as a person and lash out? I think I have the last laugh because I get to tell the story and possibly make money off of it.

So I also ran into a girl who obviously didn't know how life and dating worked. She thought the idea of me possibly talking to and meeting more than one people meant I wanted her to try out for me. That's not a try out and I told her as much. Normal people who are dating or seeking a sub usually are talk to at least 2 people at any given time and have every intention of meeting of one or both people. That way if one doesn't work out or you don't vibe with one you have options. It may sound harsh but it's the truth.

I have had crazy encounters and the thing is some of these people don't know how crazy they are. I ask a few questions to weed out the ones who are not what I want. One of the questions is "if I pick you can you host?" and one guy said that he had a room at a frat house. With this question and this type of answer I got to think about my safety and privacy. I don't know the other people in the house and with the frat house there will people be a ton of people in their for parties. I can't really vet all of those people and make sure they don't have bad intentions. Bad things happen in frat houses lots of rapes and assaults happen in frat houses. With my privacy it's not that I don't want other people to know that I'm kinky but it's because I don't want people to over hear me and assume something.

I also got another person that I didn't get a truthful vibe from. He was telling me his "stats" which is fine but he included how big his dick is. I called him on this because if you don't want sex why are you mentioning how big that part is? He may not see it that way but that is the way it comes off. It was off putting and I told him I wasn't interested. He did leave me alone which is a good outcome when you say you're not interested.

If this one is a repeat so if it I'm sorry there's a lot going on obviously. I use to send my expectations/ standards or just the main ones and at the end of the message I would put "if this is ok let's continue to talk". There was one guy I sent that to and I never heard back from him. Honestly when I read his profile I don't think he was truly ready for a female lead relationship. A lot of men who believe they're God's gift to women aren't ready for the female lead relationship they think they want. His profile seemed to come off like "I think I'm the best thing ever" and as a female dom (or a female in general) that is one of the biggest turn offs ever.

So I love this series. I get to not feel so crazy. Part of me wonders if these people read this series and want to get into the next post. Please don't do this because anyone I write about in this series don't have a chance in hell with me so don't waste my time.


About the author

Lena Bailey

Lena is the writer's name of a 35-year older writer who specializes in advice and giving knowledge.

If you have any questions or comments please email [email protected]

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