Lingerie

Lingerie

It is our anniversary. After work, I ran to the shop to get some flowers for Jane. In the shop, I am not impressed by the variety and colours. It’s all the same. Always this around that. Small white sprinkles everywhere, one large bright red thing in the middle. I honestly could do without this but I feel that after last year's disaster I have to put in some work. I am not gonna tell you what happened that year but it wasn’t pretty. Nothing extravagant, no tears or anything but there wasn’t a spark either and it was our fifth anniversary. Five is an important number for a young couple, yet we ended up doing “Netflix and chill” on our anniversary. Sorry, I digress.

After a careful consideration and a little chat with the bored florist, I got the roses. 23 of them. Maybe it is too much but I love Jane. She means the world to me and I want to make her feel special. Even though I have to get over myself once in a while.

Maybe it’s for the best. We can start a new tradition. Every three years we celebrate. Or every six? Perhaps that’s too much but that will stop those other couples who always brag about “their special day”... Everyone got them. Every couple! It’s your special day, for you, not someone else. Make them feel special, not yourself through the minds of strangers.

I have to grab a tube, it’s raining and I am already late. Jane knows we are celebrating tonight. She will be waiting. The tube is packed as always. Extra today, with the noisy ones. Stupid football. I can't get over how rude you have to be to scream and shout like that in public. We get it, you like your team. I bloody love Jane, do you see me shouting? Maybe I should start shouting her name in the tune of our favourite song - Come On Eileen. No, no the words don't match, I will look stupid shouting it alone too.

I wait for the next tube as this one is too loud and I'm afraid for the flours to go bust. I calm myself down, we still have plenty of time, Eileen, I mean Jane, will understand. I jump on the next underground train, it’s packed but I find the spot in the middle and my flowers are left untouched. At my stop, I jump out, check the time and see that I am critically late.

Say “no” to the cake. Stupid football. I lose myself in anger and step into the puddle. Oh no. Ok. This is my own doing. Time to run. I run home at the top of my speed while minding the flowers. “Mind the gap” spins in my head, I chuckle and feel at ease. Soon. I will be home with Jane and we will celebrate. Nothing special - roses, champagne, sushi and cake, just what she loves, what she deserves and bright roses her favourite, no, our favourite colour.

We are so lucky to find each other.

Shit! No cake today… That makes me sad, out of the two of us I am the one with an affinity for baked goods and yet I come unprepared.

Even from afar I see that our windows have no light.

Where is Jane? I slow down for a second, checking the time, past 6. She must be home, she couldn't forget, we talked about it on Monday. Ok, ok, I breathe out slowly and spin the wheel of what could have happened. I hear it in my brain. *Tick, tick… tick…*

Two more minutes and I’m home. Before our floor, I stop and pant. I didn’t exercise for weeks and my obsession with desserts didn't help either. I bend over on the last step and exhale slowly. My vision is spinning and blurry. Palms holding knees I straighten my back. I notice our front door isn't shut. No light, the door is open, what’s going on?! I feel my heartbeat in my throat. I’m not made for this shit.

Ok, ok.

Time to be brave. I open the door and slowly step into a dark hallway. Everything seems like it was when I left. Everything is a shadow. I take a step closer to the bedroom and see the changing lights escaping through the gaps. I slowly push open the door and see Jane standing with her back to me in front of the mirror.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, shit.

I’m such an idiot. I realise that I have left the flower on the steps and what did I think was happening? That she was robbed and dead? I read in her face, she sees my worries in the reflection, she nods and slowly turns around. I tune out of my head and hear music filling up the room.

Jane starts moving to the beat. She is the most magnificent in the aquamarine waves flowing over her. She is bathed in colours, they dance like the surface of the sea in the sunlight. My arms fall to the sides, I’m standing breathless. She sees that I'm stunned by her beauty and smiles. That makes my worries fade away.

I stand and watch while she turns and twists, slowly coming closer. Her arms waving in trance, feeling for the invisible threads of graciousness in the air. Her hips move as a pendulum back and forth making a sudden desirable motion of her soft buns. When they roll I can’t resist thinking of a hot gooey cinnamon bun I want to dip my face in. Every step is leaving an impression of her feet flying. The gracious steps on and off the bed mark the flirtatious lines of her smooth lustrous legs. I didn't know anybody could move like this until now.

She steps around me, gently touching the flocks of my hair in the process. She wears only bright red silken-smooth lingerie. It shines in the tangerine light. I’m dazed by the spectacle.

I trace the lines of her belly with my stupefied eyes. It moves like the sail in the sea breeze. I watch her breasts move up and down undisturbed by the speechless audience. When I gazed upon her neck she caught my eye. Instantaneously she bent closer to me, dropping one arm to her knee. Her hair flicked back and she left a red nail trace along the neck. It glows in the dimmed light. I only wished this moment to last forever. My fists squeezing white and I can't resist biting my lower lip.

The music, the light, the smell of sex lingering in the air swallow me. My eyes start to water. She doesn't react, instead, she comes closer and coils around me.

What more could I wish for? A cake. If I wasn’t so late. If… Flours, cake. I am unlike her. Years could have gone into this. Her delicious body hypnotises me. She is the best person I know. She must have known exactly what I was doing and trusted me to be late.

The song changes and she stands in front of me. Her nipples point out of her laced floral cherry red bra, ready to burst. She touches my chin and holds it up. I look in her eyes, bright blue, like a clean evening sky, like the shores of the hottest beaches. We stand like this for a moment, her gaze fierce, my palms sweaty. She's got powers over me.

She tiptoes, moving closer to my ear and whispers “bite me”. I didn't know I could lose a sense of speech twice. She closes my jaw with her fingernail and repeats herself. Louder. In a clear commanding tone. I shake off the loss of control, prepared to follow her orders. When she sees that I'm ready for action she points at her right nipple, it looks delicious. I go down on my knees ready to grab her. She pulls my hair gently up and says “no hands”. I nod. I want to suck on her belly button but I follow the finger and focus on the nipple. It is a cherry on top of the whipped cream dessert for two. My thoughts are in shambles. I go for it. I bite into her lingerie and feel the nipple.

I realise too late that something is different. I can feel it. I bite into it, it’s soft and juicy. Then it comes off. It’s in my mouth. I feel it dripping off my chin. I panic. She watches me fall to the ground, my body erected by my hands, her mischievous smile gets louder. I gather myself. And all of the sudden it hits me.

I lick my lips and through the veil of awe I whisper to her: “Is it cake?”

Her eyes spark up and she nods.