Filthy logo

Guess What Happens Next When You Send A Woman Send A Nude Selfie

And, more than likely, it's not what you would do.

By Ellen "Jelly" McRaePublished 8 months ago 6 min read
Image created on Canva

For those men who are thinking of hitting send on your nude selfie to a girl, stop.

Ok, well, you don't have to stop. I'm not the gatekeeper of your life. But I think it's only fair you know what you're getting yourself into.

We've had a lot of horror stories lately about unsolicited selfies and men crossing the line with how they aggressively approach women. Most of the time, we only see the fallout of these stories.

Man gets caught with his pants down, literally. Woman get's offended by a photo.

Whilst I'm not saying these scenarios don't happen, we've been sending nude pictures to each other for a while. And not every woman takes offence or has the same reaction.

I've had plenty of nude selfies sent my way, even a video or two. I didn't hate them. Not one bit.

Yet, it doesn't mean I enjoyed them or used them the same way that men do. Nude selfie culture is different between men and women. 

So before you hit send, let's find out what the woman is going to do with that snap of yours.


By the way, this isn't for the people in a relationship where nude selfie culture is fine, acceptable and established. Where it's what you do and is part of your love language.

For those people, keep sending those pics. Spice up that love life any way you can.

She zooms in

Once the photo lands in her hands, she opens it and uses her two fingers to see the fine details. She zooms in and inspects every part of the photo. 

  • Where you are. 
  • The background, the details you might not have thought of. 
  • She also looks at your body; the hair, the no-hair, moles, veins, you name it. 
  • She's evaluating what it looks like based on the details.

Which probably scares you, by the way. You wouldn't like your junk put under a microscope. 

But if you expect a woman to go down on you, she's going to see it in real life, up and close. Photos can be more flattering than under the harsh light of day, too.

By the way, a lot of women will refute my claim. 

They will pretend to feel disgusted by the photo and delete it right away. Though that might eventually happen, they want to look at what was so worth sending in greater detail.

The curiosity is too great to pass up, especially for women who are open to this type of sexual expression.

She saves it

Yeah, she might want it to disappear from her messages with you. But that doesn't mean she isn't storing it away in a folder on her phone or computer and holding onto it for later. 

She might screenshot it, instead. It's a time and date recording of your interaction too. 

You never know.

If you ask her to delete it, think about how you might answer that request. You can always be truthful, delete it and say it's done.

But that's taking everyone's word for it.

She shows someone else

I'm not saying this is a hard and fast rule, but every girl I've been friends with has done this with me. And I've done it with them. 

When they've received a nude picture from a guy, who they weren't dating, they've shown their girlfriends.

I have done it; a guy I was sleeping with used to send them to me every two to three weeks. It meant he wanted me.

If I was out with my girlfriends when I got one, I would show the nearest friend.

We wouldn't study it or zoom in together. I would say it was a three-second glance accompanied by girlish giggles. And hooting and more giggles.

They don't usually send it around like revenge porn. Normally a quick flash of their phone after a glass of wine and that's it. Sometimes they won't say who it's from. 

In many ways, it could look like a random naked man from the internet.

But it's naïve to think she won't show anyone or keep it to herself. Especially if you have something worth showing off, she wants her friends to know what she can attract. 

Or, sometimes, seek some help on what to do next with this nude information.

She feels obliged to return the favour

The nude photo is a contentious move because it does set up this social precedence that the woman reciprocates. 

You showed her yours, so she should show you hers. If the situation were reversed, you would have sent a nude selfie right back, right?

But women don't always want to do that. 

It's not in their natural instinct to start passing nude pictures as flirting or love language. in short, you can't send a picture in the hope of getting one back.

If you send a picture just to get one back, you've gone about it all wrong.

You can't get angry when she refuses, either. In fact, I wouldn't normally tell people what to do, but in this case, don't get angry. 

Don't even let some bitterness swell inside you. 

It's a sexually aggressive move that will ensure the woman will run a mile, and tell anyone willing to listen you're a pervert and scumbag.

Sorry, but that's a reality you're facing.

She knows what you want

You've put all your cards on the table. 

You want sex, right? Why else would you send a nude picture to a girl? What other possible reason would you have?

And don't try to invent some noble reason now. Too late. We all know what the nude selfie is for. 

A woman knows this, and now you're no longer a mystery. You're a 2D version of a date. You have one agenda. Sex. 

Sure, it's an assumption, but a logical one.

That's a big problem for you if your agenda is sex and a relationship. Your actions don't seem like that of a respectful person who wants to approach the relationship with sensitivity. Nor does it seem like you seem to care how relationships work. 

Relationships aren't all about sex, you know.

She's got a preview

If this photo comes before sex with her, she now knows what she's getting. And she might not like it. You might have given her a nasty preview that meant any chances of getting her into the bedroom vanishes instantly.

You are taking away the mystery too.

Half the fun of that first encounter is stripping each other, like opening a present. It's about discovering what's underneath, not having someone spoil it for you beforehand.

The preview might be enough for her to decide it's all too much for her. Or it might be what pushes her from feeling interested to pants off.

It's a gamble, though. You don't know how it's going to go until you hit send and she reacts.

She might not even react the way you had hoped.

I'm not saying don't send your nude picture…

I think you're going to do it whether I warn you against it or not.

I'm also not going to preach about how society views this type of communication nowadays. Or how easily a hacker can get into your phone and get the photo before she does.

You know all those things. You've heard the warnings. I wanted to let you know how most women receive that message and what they do with it.

Go send it, if you want. 

But you can't say you weren't warned.


If you enjoy this article, leave me a tip, follow me or even share my work on your socials! Any support for me would be appreciated 💜


About the Creator

Ellen "Jelly" McRae

I’m here to use my wins and losses in #relationships as your cautionary tale | Writes 1LD; Cautionary tale #romance fiction |

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights


There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2023 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.