Episode 8 - B*tch Better Have My Money

I don't even know homegirl like this for her to opening up to me, she's either really off or a really good sneaky-ass-acting bitch. Either way i'm going to play it cool, because she already fooled me the last time.

"So you're here to tell me... I should leave this nigga because he's a popcorn pimp, who now has your heads wanted by B out of pure kindness? Cause that doesn't make sense but thanks for the good deed. And that's sounds that a problem for you guys, so I guess we're done here" I said rudely.

"Girl it's not about me being a 'kind' person, this man ruined my life. I was going to leave him and go to B, now I can't go to anyone. You mean something to him and his wallet, you leaving will hurt him more than I can right now. There are some girls who need pimps and there are some girls who don't, but they may just like having a nigga like that around. And I feel like that's me and you. You don't need this nigga, we both know it, so leave him. This dumb ass nigga has all this shit coming to him, you're young why do you want to risk that? Leave him but actually leave him, I know all too well how long "leaving" can actually take", she said and then gathered her car keys and got up.

"You really don't have to worry about me, trust me" I said in a much lighter tone as we walked towards the door.

"I'm not. Keep this little conversation between us girls yeah, goodbye Royaal", she said as she walked through the open doorway.

I closed the door behind her, then immediately ran through all the ways it could be a plan/scheme set up by Pablo. It wouldn't really make sense for him to send Ari to come tell me that shit or tell me to leave him. Unless he's trying to be smart, and thinks if he sends her and she tells me to go, i'll want to do the opposite and stay. Cause why would I listen to her? She could also be lying to me about her really wanting to leave him and just want me out of the picture, or maybe he could be testing me. But maybe Ari's telling the truth and this is more for her than me. I mean when I leave Pablo, it would be a win for both of us.

I realized I had to get a plan together and quick. She's right, women been leaving their no good niggas from the beginning of time and still right beside him right now. I refuse to be her, if I don't plan and do i'll get too comfortable and stay. And that's just not the life I want for myself. I began to pace around the house, brewing my getaway plan.

It wasn't really a getaway plan considering I was going to stay here and he was going to move. I love my space, my first condo, I don't want to move, i'm not moving. I was going to text him and let him get his shit. He can go move in with his bitch and they can live happily ever after, over there away from me.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous, I never left a pimp before but I imagine it's not going to be easy. I just wanted to start over, start fresh without lies, drama, or a pimp. I went to the freezer and grabbed the ice cream, no point in spoiling a good night. I'm celebrating, I would soon have the new life I wanted.

It was the next morning, I didn't realize I had fallen asleep on the couch. The little bit of ice cream had melted in it's container on the coffee table and some comedy was playing on netflix. I checked my phone it was 10:16am and there was a missed call and a few texts from Pablo. I put my phone down and headed towards the washroom to brush my teeth and freshen up.

"I need to go to the bank" I said while brushing my teeth. "I'll put the money away then tell Pablo".

"Maybe I should call him", I thought to myself. "But I don't know if I can hear his voice or do it in person. He has a way with words and I lose my thoughts every time. I don't want him to trip me up, touch me or do the most", I contemplated with myself as I got dressed.

"I'll say i'm going to the grocery store, since RBC is right there too" I said, I was trying to calm myself down. I sent Pablo a text saying I was heading to the grocery store and called an uber.

The uber came and picked me up and took me to Metro, I grabbed about a two bags worth of groceries before heading over to RBC. Opening an account went faster than I expected; after I deposited my money I went back home to get right back to my plan.

It wasn't until I was back in an uber that I realized Pablo didn't text me back yet."It's like 11am, I know he's awake".

I got out the uber and carried the two bags up to the house. I grabbed my key and unlocked the door. Pablo's shoes were off to the side, he was home.

"Hey prettygirl", his gorgeous smile caught me off guard as he walked around the corner. He grabbed the bags out of my hand and kiss my forehead before taking them to the kitchen.

"You're finally home" I said, with as much enthusiasm as I could muster up.

"Yeah, I wanted to shower and shit. I called you last night, I figured you were sleeping though. I haven't really spoke to you since you came back last night, so I wanted to see you" he said as he put away the groceries. His tone was mellow, but carried an ominous feeling, kind of felt like the silence before a thunderstorm.

"Oh yeah, I waxed off the ice cream and had a spliff and ended up falling asleep on the couch. I texted you this morning before I went to get the groceries. Soooo, is everything okay? Are you okay? How's Ant doing? Did you find out who shot him?" The questions fell out of my mouth like water, I didn't even consider if I was giving myself away by the type of questions I was asking.

He looked at me, chuckled a bit, rolled his eyes and went back to putting away the groceries, "Ant's doing aight, I'm good too, everything always good until it's not right" he said in a monotone voice. "Listen, you don't got nuttin' to be worried about, aight?".

"I know baby, I just want to make sure everyone's okay, especially you. Cause I know how you are, you won't be if everyone's not", I said charmingly as I walked over and threw my hands around his waist. I could tell something was weighing heavy on him, whether I actually cared or not didn't matter; because I had to pretend like it.

"Nah it's good, i'm good prettygirl", he turned around and kissed my forehead, before walking to the couch. "You tryna watch Black Ink or what? Oh and I saw how much money you made shawty", he silently clapped like he was impressed. "Windsor got you feeling yourself uh. I like it though", he teased with that sexy ass smirk. "Bring that ass here!".

I smiled bashfully as I walked over, I could feel my lips get moist. He gripped his big arms around me and pulled me into the couch. He bearhugged me as we watched Black Ink and smoked spliffs.

It was fake, but it felt peaceful and good to be in his arms again, underneath his warm body. I don't know how to explain it, but it felt different. It's like now that I don't need him i'm able to really see him, I see him differently than I did before. Shoot I see myself differently than before too. Maybe I did have a part to play in this, by putting too much on one man. Maybe what was charming in the beginning, the innocence, the ignorance, the having to think for me turned into a liability and extra responsibility later. Maybe the fact that I needed him for everything wasn't as endearing as he made it seem. I look at him now, and I really don't know how I let so many things go unseen or unsaid.

He was so big to me before, it feels different being in my power being next to him now. I could see the man he wanted to be, the man he fooled me into thinking he was. And I could see the man he actually was, inside there's just a insecure black boy trying to not be where he was yesterday. Trying to get the love he never got yesterday, ready to use anything and everything in his power to do it. I was just a lost little black girl, looking for love, that was unfortunate enough to fall into his grip.

We kicked up in each others essence until his phone went off and he had to leave again. It was nice, being in that energy with him one last time. We didn't fuck, but the tension and intimacy was there. I allowed myself to indulge in it, because I knew what I had to do once he left.

He took a shower, got ready, grabbed the money and headed on road. He said he'd be back later but not to wait up. I was off for 3 more days and we'd go out to eat soon.

I began to pack up his shit, I couldn't let him be the pilot in this situation. I wasn't going to wait until he decided to "come grab his things". I was done with moving on his time, I packed up all of his shit, gun and money included. I decided to take out a rack to make it more realistic like I wasn't already saving something.

His stuff was packed and it was time for me to text him. I decided to smoke a spliff just to calm down my nerves. I don't know if he turned up the heat before he left, but the air in the house was thick. Like there was no room for you to breathe. 2 hours passed since he left, but it felt like time didn't change at all.

I pulled out my phone to text him, "Listen", I wrote. I didn't know how I should say it.

"I know about Ari and honestly i'm not even trying to hear it or fight with you. That's why I didn't say anything while you were here. But i'm not doing this anymore, I'm out. I packed up ALL of your stuff, you can come get it. Wish yall the best", I hit send.

I know Ari asked me to keep our little talk between us but honestly I didn't care. I just wanted to get the point across and get this shit over with, if anything i'll say some bitch at the club told me. I placed the phone down on the coffee table and stared at it.

"The end is only a new beginning, the end is only a new beginning, the end is only a new beginning", I chanted to myself.

I wasn't worried that Pablo would put his hands on me, the most he'd do is yell and break shit. He's dumb, but he's not that dumb, he wouldn't fuck up his money like that. But I guess I technically wouldn't be his money anymore..

My phone rang, it was Pablo, he called about 4 times before he sent a text. It said "wtf are you talking about. Answer the phone". He started calling again, my ringtone filled the living room, I'm surprised I could hear it over my rapid beating heart.

Another text, "Answer the fuckin phone, stop playin wit me".

He started calling again, I knew if I didn't respond he would just end up coming here on 10, so I texted him back.

"I'm not playin, you know what i'm sayin & I don't want to talk. I just want you to get your shit and go".

"Are you fucking ok? I was just in the house, man answer the fuckin phone. Stop fucking playin with me before I get tight", he texted back. He started calling again, I decided to answer.

"Hello", I sighed.

"Yo what the fuck are you talking about? Are you okay? Where is all this shit coming from?" he asked, I could tell I was on bluetooth in the car.

"I'm perfectly fine, I know about Ari and how she's your girl and you guys are playing house. But that's fine, cause i'm not apart of it anymore. So I packed up your shit, so you can go play house at her house. You can come pick it up but I don't got shit to say to you", I said with more confidence than I knew I had at the moment.

He hung up, I was shocked, did that mean I won? It couldn't be that easy.

"You wanna be a renegade like your bitchass friend uh. Yeah you didn't think i'd find out about French. I just wanted to see if you would say anything or not, who knows what other secrets your holding onto", he texted.

"You want to leave, you know what it is. Run me my $25,000 and you can go, keep the spot and everything".

"But if you don't have that, don't talk that or until you do get your ass to work bitch".