Amber

I watch the red, digital numbers on the face of the black clock on the nightstand rearrange themselves from 4:24 to 4:25 as the amber rays from the autumn sunset fill the room with its warm and present energy. The acoustic tunes that played through my Google speaker sitting on the tan, wooden dresser in the corner of the bedroom, ceased its artful ministry leaving the sounds of us catching our breath to replace the liberating sounds of the strumming guitars and soothing piano play that once played through the black, netted speaker cover. The sweet-smelling breeze fills the room from the widely-cracked window breathing life into the sun and moon tapestry hanging perpendicular on the, otherwise, bare, white walls. Its blue, clothy body dances through the ripples of air passing through and forcing the papers and book pages on my desk to dance. The autumn winds continue to rush across our bodies causing a chill to our wet skin as the goosebumps rise against your body compressing mine to the bed.

4:25 becomes 4:26 as you peel your 190lb sweaty body from off my body that you have compressed stomach down onto the bed. I release a little whimper as you rip your thick, mushroom penis from inside me. I turn onto my side to watch you, carefully, roll off the condom and wrap it up in a white kleenex. The amber rays bounce off your glistening, golden-brown complexion as you lean over to toss it in the trash. The sunset admires its reflection off of your perfectly round and ripe ass as you pick up your curve-hugging black boxer briefs. Watching your ass protrude out the top of your underwear before slipping into the solid black waistband compelled me to lean back on my forearms revealing my girthy erection. "You sure you can't stay?", I ask. You respond with silence like I wasn't even talking to you. Maybe you heard the crash of disappointment in my heart as you force one leg at a time into your blue, ripped 34s straight jeans. You do a little jump allowing your ass to jiggle a little when you pull them over the hump that meets the bottom of your chiseled vertebrae that made my penis cheer. The jingling sound from your orangeish-brown belt bounces off the walls while you hustle the strap through the denim loops making sure you don't miss any.

4:27 rolls around and the sunset is still admiring its reflection off the masculine chest and abdominals as you check yourself out in the mirror pulling your white t-shirt over your head and then your red campus hoodie. You're fixing yourself up when a loud buzzing comes from the nightstand. It's your phone and it's playing one of those cutesy Taylor Swift songs. Not judging you... completely. I grab the phone and catch a glimpse of her picture on the screen before passing it to you. You almost snatch it out of my hands in excitement to answer the call. "Hey babe! I'm walking across the campus now to meet up with you". The urgency used to convince her that losing her is not an option put my heart in its place. At 4:28, you tell her "you love her" and hang up. You slip your feet in your slightly worn Air Forces without untying the laces. "You know how to get me if you want more." Silence. "I'm talking to you, damnit!!", I think to myself as you pat down your pockets and mumble to yourself looking around the room to make sure you don't leave anything behind. Half-past the 29th minute is when you finally turned your back on me walking towards the door, unlock it, and take off. I hear your muffled footsteps imprint the carpeted hallway get more quiet and distant as the door slowly closes. I watch the door and latch approach as a countdown waiting for you grab the door once again so I can lock in that last image. But the door and latch finally embrace and, once again, I was alone.

4:30pm. My erection is deflated. My ego is bruised. My self-esteem is shattered. No "Thank you." No "I wish I could stay". Not even a courteous lie left to tell. As I lie here, I can still hear the ever-so-slight vibrating energy from the jingling of your belt buckle bouncing off the walls. The air circulating the room causes a chill around my eyes where the tears weld up and overflow the corner thresholds of my eyelids. The tears slowly roll down the side of my face before being absorbed into the bed. The sheets further torture my ever grieving heart by locking and releasing the aroma of body wash and baby powder from your skin. The corner of the blanket is still bunched and wrinkled from when your fingers interloped with mine as you came in me. I guess that was good-bye. The sun and moon tapestry's blue body has fully lifted from the wall as the ripples of air passing through and forcing the papers and book pages to fly and float across the desk as the nightly winds begin to pick up. The once autumn sunset that illuminated your body like a beacon of ecstasy has nearly declined to a dark, fall sky.

I look over at the red digital numbers on the face of the black clock on the nightstand and watch them rearrange themselves from 5:22 to 5:23. I'm still lying in the same position, sunken into the mattress. The room is full of crisp, fall, night air causing the tears on my face to dry up fast. The goosebumps surround my skin and my nipples reach its maximum hardness. I can almost see my breath, I'm so cold. I should get up and close the window. Maybe get something to eat. Honestly, I don't give a shit anymore...