Yes. But ... No...

She entered the chatter-filled room yearning for an invisibility cloak; everyone slowly stopped mid-conversation with an insatiable desire to stare. She felt their whispers crawl down her spine, her mind paralyzed by the attention; she quickly scanned the room with hopes of seeing a familiar face.

Cleo waves her hand with anxious energy, surprised and overflowing with joy. Cleo's palms are clams, and her body is shifting climates by the minute.

She sees Cleo and walks at a glacial speed through the room, hesitant yet curious. As she walks over, her mind starts to rapidly sift through past memories, her body is running hot, and her spirit is pleading for an S.O.S. Cleo breaks the ice and awkwardly grabs her by the hands, looking deep into her dazed eyes, and wraps her arms around her with relief.

Cleo: Woooowwww! I cannot believe you are here ... or more so that you trusted me and decided to take me up on my invitation.

She: Yea, I'm not so sure why I'm here, and I can't get a grip on my feelings to even know what I'm feeling.

Cleo: I ... I'm grateful. Grateful that you are here in the flesh and willing to ...

She: Hold up... I'm not willing to do anything. I just said that I'm unsure about all of this.

Cleo: Ok, understandable. Can we at least sit down?

She: Sure ... but first, I need to run to the bathroom real quick.

Cleo: Ok, let me show you where it is...

She: Nope, just tell me where to go.

Cleo: Ok... it's outside, across from the garden.

She: Cool, I'll be right back.

Cleo sits down with unsettled energy and starts bouncing her legs with intense nervousness. Her mind is pacing, ruminating, and wondering how all of this will unfold. Rehearsing and repeating what she wants to say ... fumbling over her thoughts ... she decides to get up and walk towards the garden.

A tall, slender gentleman gently taps Cleo and says, "You know the rules."

Cleo turns around with reluctance and goes back to her table, wondering if this was a mistake.

She is in the bathroom having a whole therapy session. Her mouth is pressed against the phone, whispering and questioning why she's in this situation.

Therapist: It's ok; give yourself permission to explore and make mistakes. This may not be a mistake. This could be a chance for a new healthy beginning or end. Try being compassionate and practice a little patience with yourself and Cleo ... just see where this goes.

She: I don't even know why I said yes! I can't even walk out of this bathroom ignoring our past.

Therapist: I'm not asking you to ignore your past, but there is a reason why you said yes. Do you want to figure out why?

She: I don't know! This is why I called you! Aren't you supposed to have the answers? Isn't this why I'm paying you a boatload of money??

Therapist: Let's find a way to calm down.

She: I don't want to calm down! I need answers ... I need you to make sense of my feelings and make sense of why I'm here!

She: I'm in an emotional crisis right now, and I NEED you to help me sort out WHY I'm here and what did I sign up for?

She: I religiously sit in your office, crying, purging, and seeing new horizons... why isn't all of that hard work paying off right now? Why does it seem like I am back in square one?! I mean... I've done too much work on myself to be BACK in this situation!!

She: Shouldn't I be healed by now?! I shouldn't even be flooded with feelings... I should be unphased, unbothered, and...

I should be out there as the new me! Cleo doesn't even know who the new me is! I should be...

She: Hello? Hello!!!!

She: H- E - L - L -O OOOOOOO????

She: UGGHHHH! Are you kidding me right now?! Why is my battery dead!!!!

She: Ok, let me just pull myself together and figure this out on my own.